Heaven Beside You
by Santana
Summary: Luther is gone and Fayt is dying of boredom so he decides to visit Albel. Shared hardships will bring them closer together, whether they like it or not. AlbelxFayt.
1. If Friends Were Flowers I'd Pick You

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter One:** If Friends Were Flowers I'd Pick You

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean.

**A/N: **This is my first fanfic attempt, so please be gentle, I bruise easily.

In the months following the defeat of Luther, Fayt had been searching for a place to call home. Earth was gone, along with his old life and so much had happened to him that it just seemed unfeasible to try and return to school as if nothing had happened. People would recognize him, the government feared him and there were those who would gladly try to use him if given the opportunity. Eventually he had decided to return to Elicoor. He knew the people there and they were, for the most part, friendly to him. In fact, the planet reminded him very much of the world he had lost so acclimatizing had not been a problem.

At first he had stayed in Aquios for a while, enjoying the calm serenity of the Holy City. The air was pure there, and the water was clean and fresh. It was truly a wonderful place, but something had begun to bother him the longer he stayed. He knew that the peaceful city was beginning to dull his heightened senses as he was overtaken and consumed by complacency. There was no driving purpose behind him which required action and, at least in the beginning, he had welcomed the newfound peace and tranquillity. He had no responsibilities, no one was demanding anything from him and he was allowed to come and go as he pleased without restrictions. But eventually he had become restless. The city was not blissfully calm as he had once believed but stagnant, and the inactivity was slowly killing his ambition.

Unable to stay in the claustrophobic city any longer, Fayt had left on a journey. It eventually led him back to the land of Airyglyph, and back to Albel the Wicked. The Black Brigade commander was not one to remain inactive so Fayt looked forward to the refreshing change of pace life in Airyglyph would offer him.

In order to keep busy, he had decided to started patrolling with Albel and it could be said that the other man tolerated him as one would tolerate a benign tumour. Albel was resistant at first, but eventually Fayt began to grow on him and he adapted quickly.

During their previous travels together, Albel had started to grow close to the young leader, perhaps even becoming fond of him in his own way, but by the time they fought Luther, nothing had come of his affections. After Luther's defeat they had gone their separate ways and Albel had almost forgotten his feelings. But now Fayt was back, and Albel wasn't sure how to react to his sudden reappearance. Why exactly had Fayt come back to him? Was it just as the boy claimed and he had returned due to sheer boredom? Or was there something else driving him, something that neither of them would realize until they were forced to acknowledge it? Whatever the case, their current relationship had fallen into familiar patterns and for the moment both were comfortable with how things were proceeding.

It was still early in the morning and the sun had not yet risen in the sky when Fayt was rudely awakened by someone prodding him forcefully in the side with the hilt of a sword. Albel's voice broke the peaceful calm of morning with a not so gentle reminder."Wake up fool. We have work to do."

Disgruntled and moody, Fayt made a feeble attempt to bat the sword away with his hand before turning over and pulling the bed sheets up around his neck. When Albel continued to prod him, this time with the blade unsheathed, Fayt gave up and half opened his eyes to glare at his assailant. Slowly, Fayt began to rouse but his movements were sleepy and sheepish. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Fayt wondered what time it was exactly and silently lamented Elicoor's lack of clocks. Looking dazedly around the room, the blue-haired boy spotted Albel who had moved away from the bed and was now staring thoughtfully out the window of the Kirlsa mansion's guest bedroom. Fayt was tempted to fling a pillow at his turned back but decided against it. Albel was not known for his sense of humour and Fayt was just too tired to start something like that this early in the morning. After all, he wanted to live long enough to see the sun rise at the very least.

Through tired eyes Fayt examined his companion in the soft glow of candlelight which illuminated his room as if it was the first time he had ever bothered to look at him that closely. Albel, as usual, was dressed in his trademark outfit. There was the form fitting mauve top which left little to the imagination, loose billowing skirt, slit up the side to allow ample movement . . . and to give any interested viewers a delicious view of Albel's shapely legs which were covered, for the most part, in the same dark purple fabric. Left exposed were Albel's firm muscular thighs, for aesthetic purposes Fayt supposed, or else he would have worn pants.

Next Fayt admired the other man's jet black and gold tipped hair. It shone with health, unlike most of the planet's other inhabitants, and was also immaculately clean. Cascading down his shoulders were two long braids, ending in gold highlights, which bound and kept the long hair in check as well as providing a perfect juxtaposition for Albel's graceful, inward curving spine. To top everything off, Albel had those beautifully expressive ruby-red eyes which were currently piercing him with a furious glare of annoyance.

"What do you think you're looking at, maggot?"

Fayt simply smiled and met his companion's eyes with a wry stare of his own. "You haven't changed a bit Albel," he chuckled softly.

"What's that supposed to mean, fool? I haven't changed . . . were you expecting something different? Do I disappoint you?"

Fayt shook his head quickly so Albel would not go ballistic on him. "No Albel, it's nothing like that. I'm just happy to see you again. So much has changed in my life . . . " Pain flittered across his features briefly, as memories offered to escort him into despair, but he rallied against it and continued. "What I mean, is that it is nice to know that some things have stayed the same, despite what has happened. It's kind of comforting, don't you think?"

"Useless sentimentality," Albel scoffed bitterly. "Whether things change or stay the same, it doesn't matter. All we can do is go forward and make the best of our current situation."

"You're absolutely right, as always Albel."

"While we're on the subject, Fayt, you haven't changed that much either, you know . . . " As he said this, Albel strode across the room to stand beside the bed and gazed down at his young guest.

"Oh? How's that?" Even though they were so close together, Fayt could not quite discern what it was he saw in the other man's eyes. Holding his breath in anticipation, Fayt imagined that maybe Albel was going to admit that he actually liked what he saw. Perhaps Albel would finally approve of him and accept him completely. It was unlikely, but he would still love to see it happen. Fayt's hopes were dashed though as the other man finished his thought.

"No Fayt," he said, shaking his head disgustedly, "you haven't change a bit . . . You're still a lazy maggot who won't get out of bed when you're told!" To emphasize this point, Albel slid both hands under Fayt, who was still lying in bed, half covered by blankets and flipped him out unceremoniously onto the hard wooden floor.

"Well that was unnecessary," Fayt muttered sulkily as he staggered to his feet and brushed himself off. At least he had recovered quickly.

As Albel watched him, his eyes glittered with amusement and his face twitched as a restrained smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth. "It got you out of bed, didn't it?" Albel asked him as his smirk blossomed into a full blown wicked grin. "Now that you are up, get dressed and we'll be on our way. You _can_ dress yourself, right? Or would you like me to do _that_ for you as well?"

Ignoring Albel's taunts, Fayt quickly pulled on his pants and shirt vest, not caring that his companion was watching him a little too closely as he dressed.

"Ready to go _now,_ fool?"

_As if I have a choice._ Fayt sighed and glanced moodily toward Albel. "Can we at least have breakfast first?" he asked hopefully.

Albel mulled the question over in his head for several moments. Eating would take time and he was anxious to leave, but if Fayt was truly hungry, he would be absolutely useless if anything happened. Eventually he nodded with approval. "Fine. If the little worm is hungry then by all means it must be fed," he said with more than a hint of sarcasm. "Follow me, fool . . ."

Together they left the guest bedroom and headed down to the basement and into the storage cellar. Albel moved swiftly toward a dimly lit corner and removed two pieces of fruit from a dank looking barrel. "Here," he said, thrusting one of the presumed apples toward Fayt who accepted it with suspicion.

"What's this?" The Embodiment of Destruction inquired innocently.

"An apple," the Wicked One replied, looking at Fayt like he had just said the dumbest thing imaginable. His gaze was a mix of disdain and concern, wondering whether hitting the floor had damaged the boy's brain or if he was just plain stupid.

Fayt regarded the shrivelled fruit he held in his hands and considered what Albel had told him. He supposed that it had been an apple at some point in its existence, but after an indeterminate time in storage it had lost all the characteristics which would readily identify it as a bonafide apple. The small fruit seemed to heave a depressed sigh as Fayt examined it further. It was wilted, a bit soft and its skin was dull brown in colour as opposed to the usual glossy red and he wondered if it was even edible.

"So this is what you consider breakfast," he muttered weakly. "No wonder you're so thin Albel . . ." He immediately regretted his comments when he saw a flicker of sadness and doubt in Albel's eyes. He had been hurt by Fayt's words. But the other man's visage cleared quickly, switching from being upset to the more familiar offended in the span of several seconds.

"I suppose it's a little different from what those Aquarian dogs have been feeding you," he said, every word smothered in scorn and disgust. "But it's all we have."

It was true. In Aquios, Fayt had been well fed every day. The harvest had been superb and food, as always, was plentiful. Meanwhile, people were starving in Airyglyph. Though food was abundant, Aquaria had not offered to share and Airyglyph had been too proud to ask. The war had been over for a while now, but tensions were still high and trust was not easily given.

"I'm sorry Albel, I meant no disrespect," he said sincerely.

But Albel just shrugged and shook his head wearily. "You have nothing to apologize for except stating the obvious. It's no secret that we don't have it as good as they do, just a fact of life. Besides, Woltar insists that we give what little we do have to the spineless maggots in town who either cannot or will not feed themselves." Suddenly Albel's eyes blazed passionately, and filled with pride. "Irregardless, I'll not have people say that I wasn't able to feed you properly. So here, have mine," he said fiercely while holding out the second apple, waiting patiently for Fayt to take it.

"It's all right Albel. I'll be fine, really. You need to eat too."

"Never mind that fool, I've already eaten while you were still sleeping."

_He's lying . . . but if I call his bluff, he'll hate me for it . . . _Fayt knew that eating the apples would most likely make him sick, but if he had complained, or attempted to explain to Albel that it wasn't the quantity but the quality which was the problem it would severely damage their already tenuous friendship. So Fayt reached out and gently took the proffered apple. "Thank you," he said, making sure that he sounded properly grateful and beholden. Looking into his caretaker's eyes, Fayt was duly rewarded. Albel's eyes sparkled with something close to happiness. Perhaps it was still pride, or even satisfaction, but it could just as easily have been an illusion since it had quickly faded. Feeling the need to give his friend something more to gloat about, Fayt spoke again. "You make me feel like a dependant weakling you know . . . "

"That's because you _are_ weak, at least compared to me," his companion replied mercilessly. "Still, on your own you are quite strong. If you weren't, I never would have . . ." Albel's voice trailed off but his mind finished the thought silently._ I never would have let you come near me._

"Albel?"

"Forget it. It's nothing. Eat!" he said with authority, gesturing toward the untouched apples. "And don't let anyone say I couldn't provide for you. It's not that I care, but I have a reputation to uphold."

"I thought your reputation was being Albel the _Wicked_, not Albel the Generous. If you really want to uphold your precious reputation, you should let me starve. Unless, of course, you do care and just don't want to admit it."

"Shut up, worm! Those apples won't eat themselves. Why do you hesitate?"

Reluctantly, Fayt bit into the first apple and chewed it thoughtfully as they started walking out of the mansion and into town. Suddenly it occurred to him that Albel had not said where they were going. Swallowing quickly, Fayt dared to ask. "Exactly where are we heading? We don't usually need to leave this early in the morning for a regular patrol, so what's up?"

Albel's eyes brightened in response to the boy's interest and he spoke with barely contained excitement, at least as much excitement as he was capable of. "There have been reports of a strange and very powerful monster attacking villagers near the Mountains of Barr. It is our job to find, and defeat the beast before it can do any more damage."

"You're looking forward to this aren't you?" Fayt spluttered incredulously, nearly choking. It wasn't a question, more like a resigned statement as Fayt shook his head helplessly. Only Albel would find pleasure in waking up at the crack of dawn to kill a rampaging beast which was probably dangerous if not deadly.

"Hopefully it will present some small challenge. Of course with you here we should be unbeatable . . . if you don't slow me down that is."

Fayt gawked at him. Was that really praise he had heard? Sure it had ended with something a little less than kind, but he was willing to take what he could get. "Do you mean that?"

". . . Yes Fayt, you are indispensable. You will be the perfect bait for this monster. Then, while you distract it with prattling, or swinging your sword wildly as you normally would, I'll go in for the kill."

"Bait . . ." His heart sunk to the soles of his feet where it was promptly stomped on. "You're kidding right? You wouldn't really . . . ?" Fayt couldn't finish. He was too afraid of what the answer might be.

"Hmph. You do smell quite tempting. Sweet even, like apples. Surely that will peak the monster's interest."

"That's low, even for you." Fayt grumbled, shooting his friend a disgusted look. _I should have seen that one coming . . . _Ignoring the amused chuckle which came from his companion, Fayt turned his attention toward the second apple. Once he was done eating, Fayt had yet another question. "So . . . is there a dragon knight around here somewhere waiting to take us to the base of the mountain?"

"We're not walking the whole way, are we?"

Albel turned on him. "And what if we are?" he demanded angrily. "Do you have a problem with that, worm?"

Fayt crossed his arms and levelled an annoyed glare at the other man. He had only asked a simple question, Albel didn't have to overreact. "It just doesn't make sense, that's all. If we walk, that uses a lot of energy, energy we can't afford to waste _especially_ if you want to fight a monster at the end of everything."

_Damned flawless logic . . . _"Look, we don't have to rely on those dragon bastards for anything, got it? They are inferior and so asking for their help is a clear sign of weakness. I only accepted their assistance that time with Crosell because of your pathetic friends. Ordinarily I can get by on my own."

"What have you got against them? If they are inferior, then you should exploit them to suit your own needs. Is it because of how Vox trained them or something else? Now that I think about it, how come you don't have a dragon Albel? Shouldn't someone with your strength have one too? Especially since you are clearly superior to the current dragon knights . . ."

Albel was trembling with . . . something. He didn't know if it was rage at Fayt's words or the fear of being forced to answer his questions and admit that he had failed the Accession of the Flame ceremony long ago. But Fayt was not finished and his questions continued to get even closer to Albel's private shame.

" . . . or are there certain requirements or something, like you have to be the son of a dragon knight to even have the opportunity?"

_I was the son of a dragon knight . . ._

"I've heard people talk about a certain ceremony and if you pass the test you'll get a dragon partner. Does that mean anyone can try, and when it's over you get a dragon?"

_Not everyone finishes . . . some die. I should have died . . . _

"Er, Albel? You haven't said a word or even made an attempt to answer any of my questions . . . Is something wrong?" Sensing the sudden tension, Fayt became quiet.

_You mean besides the fact that you are listing my broken dreams?_ Looking away in an effort to hide his inner struggle Albel rebuked him. "It's none of your business fool. Just drop it."

"Okay . . . so we walk." Knowing he should at least try to make amends, Fayt continued. "I have faith in your judgement Albel. You wouldn't lead me astray."

"Hmph, that kind of mindless obedience will get you killed some day. Such trust should not be awarded lightly." Albel made an attempt to sound scornful of Fayt's optimism, but in truth the boy's complete confidence in him and his abilities had helped to chase away the pain of his childhood failure.

_So if I question him he gets angry, and if I agree with him he gets angry . . . This is hopeless but I suppose it can't hurt to play along._ "I wouldn't trust you if I didn't think you deserved it, believe me. When we were travelling together you proved your worth a thousand times over. Besides, I'm a guest here and you know this planet better than I ever will so I have no choice but to accept your decisions.

"No Fayt, you're wrong," Albel said seriously for once. "There are always choices in life and often people make the wrong ones. For example, how do you know that staying with me and following my orders will not lead to your death?"

Shrugging, Fayt answered him honestly. "I don't know, and that is what makes life interesting. If we knew how everything would end, we would most likely spend our entire lives trying to avoid that inevitability and miss a lot in the process. This situation is kind of like the old saying, it's the journey that is important, not the destination. If I am to die as a result of being here with you, than I will make sure our time together is well worth dying for."

"You say that now, but that is only because you know nothing of death." Albel snapped without thinking before growling with impatience. "But I tire of this conversation . . ." Albel stalked away impatiently and entered the Kirlsa Caverns. It was the fastest route for their purposes and he welcomed the darkness of the underground passageways which would hide his reaction to Fayt's words.

Fayt's views had been unnerving to say the least, and Albel was finding it harder and harder to ignore him and dismiss the boy's ideals as mere ignorance. Fayt truly believed in everything he said and it was not due to a lack of experience either, as Albel had suggested. The boy was well acquainted with the concept of death and he supposed that Fayt would sacrifice his life for just about anything or anyone if he felt it was necessary. While some people would find this type of dedication noble or even admirable, Albel found it disgusting. Only a fool would give their life for another, or risk death just so they could remain with someone. His father had been a fool, and so had Fayt's for that matter. They owed their lives to the deaths of others. It was almost as if they belonged together . . .

_I wonder if he feels the same way . . ._ _Sickened by the fact that he is only alive because someone died in his place. _Albel thought this to himself while glancing over his shoulder at the oblivious Fayt. _We shouldn't be alive and yet here we are . . . _

Albel shook his head to clear it. He was thinking too much. They had both been given a second chance thanks to the idiocy of their parents and he was not going to waste his time with useless thoughts.

"Come on Albel! The haulers are this way!" Fayt's voice shattered Albel's concentration and his mind returned to consider their current situation. Apparently, Albel had been so preoccupied that without realizing it he had started walking down the wrong tunnel and he hastened to retrace his steps. Fuming, he approached Fayt and shot him a disgusted look which was the byproduct of fierce embarrassment and the necessity to deny such a thing even existed.

"I know that fool! Think before you speak!" he snapped harshly as he stormed past the boy. Deep thoughts always ruined his mood and right now, Fayt was the only one he could lash out against. Fortunately, Fayt was used to the other man's mood swings and the words washed over him harmlessly. _It's going to be one of those days . . . _

A/N: Congratulations on making it to the end! I hope that someone found that entertaining. If you are that someone, please review.Chapter2 is basically finished aswell,so it'll be updatedas soon as I get around to it.


	2. Like Father, Like Son

**Title: **Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 2: **Like Father, Like Son

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Star Ocean.

**A/N:** Thanks to everyone for the kind reviews!They really made me feel a lot better about what I'm doing. Hopefully this next installment won't be a disappointment.With that said, here's chapter 2!

ooooo

The hauler beast delivered them to the cave's exit without incident, placing them that much closer to their destination.Heading up into the mountains via the Bequerel mountain path, they met with and defeated various insignificant creatures which Albel did not hesitate to classify according to his elite and complex system of maggots and worms.

Fayt was surprised to learn that there were no creatures deserving of the fool moniker but made no attempt to point this out to his companion. Perhaps fool was now reserved for him, since it seemed to be Albel's insult of choice these days. It was true that Albel had started to address the blue-haired boy by his given name, but he still said the name "Fayt" with the same disgusted tone one would use to complain about the stench of an uncleaned lum stall.

The sun had yet to rise completely and the sky was bathed in the pastel colours of dawn when Fayt cut down yet another spiny rodent.Turning to his companion, he flashed a quick, satisfied smile before asking yet another vital question."So where exactly is this thing supposed to live? You said it was attacking people around here, but where would it be now?"

Wiping fresh spilled blood from his katana absently, and without even bothering to look at Fayt, Albel offered an answer."There is a canyon deep within the mountain range which is reported to be the only place large enough to house the beast comfortably." Sheathing his sword, Albel turned his gaze on Fayt and continued. "I assume that it will be there now, and we will be able to ambush it. Most of the attacks have taken place later in the afternoon so if we make good time this morning we should be able to reach the canyon by the time the beast is just waking up. If it is still tired, we will wait until it has woken completely before subduing it. After all, what would be the point in defeating an enemy which is half asleep?"

As usual, Fayt was not surprised by the other man's lust for battle and to be honest, he too was itching for a good fight. Nodding in agreement, Fayt voiced his thoughts. "There's no fun to be had if your victim doesn't fight back, and there is no glory or pleasure to be gained from killing the helpless, right?"

Albel raised an eyebrow at the boy's words. _So he shares my enthusiasm? This is indeed a rare occurrence. _"Heh, the maggot speaks the truth for once but . . ." Albel's speech was cut short as he drew his katana once again, lunged past Fayt and sliced through the neck of a wolf creature who had been readying itself to pounce on the unsuspecting boy.

Fayt spun around and his frightened eyes took in the scene which had played out behind him with delayed shock. Albel stood before him, triumphantly licking the blood from his blade, relishing the taste as well as the disturbed look which the action brought to Fayt's face. "As I was saying . . . There is little joy in slaughtering the weak, but it must be done."

"Albel, you . . . ?"Fayt gaped in disbelief._He protected me . . . _

"What?You didn't actually think I'd let that miserable creature spill your blood, did you?You're mine.I alone will make you bleed, understand?"

"Perfectly." Fayt shook his head sadly, not knowing if he should be offended or flattered by Albel's sadistic declaration of possession.Whatever the case, his answer seemed to please the other man so Fayt supposed that being Albel's property couldn't be all that bad. _I suppose that's the only way he can justify his actions. How sad . . ._

Side by side they travelled further up into the mountains and at long last they reached the famed Dragon Road. There were fewer dragons than there had been the last time Fayt recalled coming this way and he wondered if it had anything to do with this new creature. If it was attacking humans, what would stop it from doing the same to the mountain dragons?

It seemed like such a long time since Fayt had been in the mountains but in reality it had only been a relatively short time. Things had progressed rapidly since that fateful day Hyda was attacked and his life had changed forever. He couldn't help feeling strange returning to the familiar mountain caves where they had sought the aid of Crosell without the friends he had made during his journey.

For a while, that small group of people had become his family and Fayt had become incredibly fond of everyone who had lent him their assistance. But now, it was just Albel and himself. It should have made him depressed. His friends were scattered across the galaxy, after all, but for some reason he was happier than he had ever been with the others. He wasn't part of the larger group any longer, but he wasn't alone either and Fayt couldn't help thinking that it was better this way.

"Albel?" He addressed the man beside him hesitantly, as if he still wasn't quite sure that what he was about to say was a good idea. It might even get him run through, but Fayt felt compelled to speak.

"What do you want now?" Albel muttered impatiently. He turned to look at Fayt briefly but did not stop walking.

"T-thank you," his voice seemed small and Fayt wondered if he had even been heard. He needn't have worried.

_Thank you?_ Albel was momentarily stunned into silence since the words had seemed to come from nowhere. There had not been anything to prompt them so why had Fayt said it? If only he had been able to hear Fayt's silent reflection, all would have been made clear to him. Instead, Albel used the old-fashioned method to get the information. He asked Fayt a question. "For what exactly?" he inquired finally. "I don't recall doing anything which would necessitate being thanked." _No one has ever thanked me for anything. Only Fayt . . ._

"Thank you, for letting me stay here . . . with you. I don't know where else I could have gone. I just want you to know that I appreciate it and I'm glad. You don't have to say anything either, I only wanted you to know that I'm grateful." The weight of his confession had started to make Fayt's cheeks burn with embarrassment. He shouldn't have said such things. It would only anger his companion. Before Albel could reply, Fayt trotted on ahead and was soon nothing more than a speck in the distance before he disappeared completely into the Barr Caves.

Far behind him, Albel was frowning in confusion. What had come over the boy which had made him speak in such a manner? Surely he realized that Albel really didn't care if he was there or not. Fayt could stay or go, it made no difference to him either way. But part of him, a tiny, minuscule yet still inescapable part insisted that his life had improved when Fayt had returned. "Sentimental fool," Albel muttered, unsure if he was referring to the blue-haired boy who had hurried on ahead, or himself.

Wandering through the caves, alone now, Fayt finally came to the exit. The sun was high in the sky as he left the darkened corridors and entered the thin stretch of rocky land which surrounded the great canyon Albel had talked about.

Looking down over the steep walls of the chasm, Fayt saw what must have been the largest dragon on Elicoor II. It was massive, much larger than Crosell had been and it was surprisingly beautiful. The beast was curled in a loose ball with its tail wrapped around its side and was apparently asleep, just as Albel had predicted. Glossy black scales covered its body, neatly overlapping like the finest armour one could imagine, and they gleamed with an iridescent rainbow of subdued colours.

Fayt shivered in spite of himself. There was something odd about the beast, but he couldn't quite identify what it was exactly that made him so nervous. "Shit," he cursed quietly. "Can we beat that thing?" he mused aloud, completely unaware of Albel who was now standing quietly behind him. Moving quickly, Albel had caught up to him just in time to hear his doubts.

"You're not actually scared, are you?"

Hearing the swordsman's gruff voice startled him, and Fayt nearly jumped out of his skin. Albel saw this and smiled. "Typical. And to think I almost believed that you were showing some promise."

Regaining his composure and completely forgetting that it wasn't that long ago that he had been emotionally gushing over his companion, Fayt turned to face Albel angrily. "Enough with the insults! Just admit it. That thing looks dangerous, even for us."

Albel merely stared at him. Finally he shrugged and responded in a voice that was strangely calm. "You're welcome to leave. It's really not your concern. But I'll lose face if that beast isn't dealt with."

As frightening as the dragon was, letting Albel fight it alone was even worse. "No Albel, you were right before. It will be a worthy challenge. Besides, I'm not just going to leave you! We're in this together, come Hell or high water!" Fayt beamed at him and in that instant, Albel's stubborn resolve wavered.

For the first time in what seemed like ages, Albel was actually enjoying himself. Fayt's return had provided him with a welcome distraction from the excruciating boredom of life in Airyglyph. When word had spread of a powerful beast, he had been eagerly awaiting the chance to once again enter battle with Fayt at his side. Not only that, but once he had been separated from his idiotic gang of friends, the boy was actually good company, though Albel often denied the fact. And it didn't hurt to see that Fayt was thriving in his new environment in spite of, or perhaps because of, the company he was keeping.

_It might be dangerous, and Fayt could get hurt, or worse. _Albel looked deep within himself and was surprised by his next revelation. _I don't want that to happen. _Albel didn't understand why he felt this way, but the feelings were there nonetheless and he couldn't ignore them no matter how much he wanted to.

It was one thing to endanger his own life, it wasn't worth much anyway, but Fayt was beloved across the galaxy. If he died fighting some stupid dragon on a backwater planet people would be outraged. He would have insisted that the boy turn back, but Fayt was already making his way down the rock face and heading toward the sleeping behemoth.

"Fayt!" he hissed desperately. "Get back here! You can't just rush in like that, fool." _Damn it. If he's not careful, he'll be killed._

But Fayt didn't hear his companion's warning as he scaled down the cliff, nor did he notice the pale blue eye which opened lazily and observed his approach. Albel had seen it though, and panic seized him. Fayt had almost made it to the canyon floor, and the beast's shining claws flexed in anticipation.

Scrambling to make up the distance between Fayt and himself before the dragon made its move, Albel started skimming down the rocky wall. In his haste his body did not seem to register the small messages of pain that were sent out from the various scrapes and gashes which were accumulating on his arm, legs and torso, as he fumbled downwards and was cut by the sharp outcropping granite. All that mattered was facing that monster and getting both of them home alive.

Nearing the bottom, Fayt gasped as he stumbled and slipped after missing a foot hold. He tumbled roughly down the rest of the wall and collapsed on the hard stone ground below, groaning in pain. Moments later, Albel was beside him, coaxing the boy to his feet with the aid of his metal claws while he kept a watchful eye on the dragon's movements.

Groggily, Fayt rose to stand beside his alert companion. "Albel, what . . . ?"

"Silence, fool. The beast awakens." Taking Fayt by the arm, Albel dragged him into open space a good distance away from the dragon. There was no way he would allow that thing to trap them against the steep wall.

As one might expect, the dragon was none to pleased with being woken from its peaceful slumber. Slowly it staggered to its feet and yawned, showing several rows of deadly fangs, some of them still stained with blood and Fayt nearly vomited when he saw the unmistakable shape of a human arm stuck between two incisors. It was obvious that the dragon was capable of crushing either of its attackers effortlessly and what was worse, the beast was well aware of that fact. Raising a single claw to its mouth, the dragon deliberately picked the little leftover bits of human flesh from between its teeth and smiled.

Overall it seemed generally unconcerned and perhaps a little amused with its current situation because it took the time to stretch its forelegs and flex its massive membranous wings which glistened in the afternoon sun. Only then did the dragon turn its full attention toward the source of its discomfort. Crystal blue eyes assessed them in one sweeping glare and Fayt trembled as those same cryptic eyes passed over him in judgement. There was intelligence swirling behind its casual glance, and it was terrible. This beast was far superior to Crosell in every way which caused Fayt to wonder where it had come from.

"_Vermin. You dare challenge me? Foolish children! You will pay for your arrogance. Allow me to be the first to congratulate you on your descent into the underworld._"

The dragon's voice reverberated inside their heads. It was telepathic, and the mental intrusion shook both of them to the core, but it was Fayt who hesitated. It was just too much. He couldn't take the strain of that monster's piercing gaze combined with the booming voice which threatened to unravel him from the inside. Those eyes saw right through him, past the fear, past the doubts and into his future where it could see his death.

"Snap out of it, fool!" It was Albel's voice which shook him out of his stupor, that and the forceful cuff to the back of his head. "Don't let this overgrown lizard's taunts affect you! Attack!"

"_Prepare yourselves mortal scum. Those who tempt my wrath will pay with their lives!_"

Without hesitation, they charged the enraged beast who faced them fearlessly. It's offensive and defensive capabilities were unknown, yet one thing was certain; no matter how confident the dragon had sounded, its body was still groggy with sleep and its movements were slow and laboured.

Fayt easily dodged the heavy blows which were levelled against him and skirted past the beast's front to attack it from behind. One glance at Albel confirmed that the other man was succeeding in his efforts to distract the mighty dragon's attention from his actions. Apparently the dragon was not prepared for close combat and its mobility was greatly restricted by the narrow chasm which was working to their advantage.

Seeing his opportunity, Fayt thrust his sword upwards, intending to slice through the soft underbelly of the beast as he passed and gut him that way. With satisfaction, he felt his blade sink deep into the creature's flesh and he grimly awaited the bloody mess of innards which should have followed his attack. But there was nothing. The dragon's creamy white flesh showed no sign of damage, and did not even have a scratch to prove that Fayt had made contact. _I must have missed, but, I could feel it slide through. Its skin must be tougher than I thought._

In the small fraction of time it took to reflect upon what had just happened Fayt became vulnerable. With one flick of its tail, the dragon sent Fayt flying back to land out in front where Albel was currently weaving and twisting just out of the beast's range.

"Worthless maggot!" Albel roared when Fayt rolled to a stop at his feet. "How could you possibly miss?"

"I'd like to see you do better!" He cried from the ground before rising painfully to his feet. "There's something strange about this. I think it's toying with us. That thing had the power to break every bone in my body. Instead it used just enough force to ensure I landed back here."

"Then perhaps it is weaker than we first assumed. Just because it is large, does not mean it is strong. It's just another overgrown worm, and I'll prove it!"

From where he was standing a good distance away, still recovering from the attack, Fayt watched as Albel glided past the beast's defences and set to work hacking away at its hindquarters. Strangely enough, the creature did not make any effort to stop him. Instead, it turned its attention toward Fayt, and fixed the boy with its now hypnotic gaze.

"_You cannot win boy, give up. Your friend will die, and it will be your fault. You are not strong enough to defeat me, nor can you hope to outsmart me. I know everything about you, Fayt Leingod."_

At the mention of his name, Fayt broke out in a cold sweat and he tightened the grip on his sword. "What are you talking about?" he demanded.

"_You are insecure. Weak. Useless. Deep down you know this. You are a burden to your friends and death follows in your footsteps. How many have died because of you? Because they were close to you? How many did you fail to protect? And how many innocents have you slaughtered just because they were in your way?"_

The voice in his mind was seductive and Fayt quickly lost himself to the mental grief and guilt which the dragon was feeding him. His eyes clouded and Fayt stood transfixed and helpless, completely mesmerized by the dragons endless blue orbs which seemed to penetrate him, rifling though his darkest and most painful thoughts and memories only to bring the worst ones to the surface in order to torment him. Fingers loosened and his sword clattered to the ground.

At the sound of the falling sword, Albel's head swivelled from the bloody gashes he had left in the dragon's haunches and he saw Fayt. The boy was standing motionless, green eyes locked with sky blue ones, as one clawed hand of the dragon was raised in anticipation. The beast would have its fun breaking the boy's will. Then it would break his body.

_What the hell is he doing? _Racing back toward the entranced Fayt, Albel couldn't contain himself. "Move, maggot!" he barked hopefully, but Fayt showed no sign that he had heard. The dragon spoke again.

"_And what about your father Fayt?_"

"F-father . . ." he whispered quietly.

"Get out of the way, worm!" Albel was closing in fast but his stomach lurched when he saw the dragon's claws twitch, poised to strike at any moment.

"_If it wasn't for you, he'd be alive, wouldn't he?_"

". . . Yes" Tears streamed down his face and Fayt stumbled forward, unwittingly moving closer to his death.

"Run, fool!"

"_You don't deserve to live do you?_"

"N-no . . . " Another step.

"_Nobody wants to have you at their side Deathbringer. The universe will be better off without you._ _Prepare to die."_

Like a pendulum of the doomsday clock, the dragon's arm swung down in one swift motion.

_I'm not going to make it . . . _"FAYT" Albel screamed the name with every fibre of his being and was immediately shocked and confused by his behaviour. _What am I doing? Why do I care? _It was the boy's own fault for succumbing to the beast's tricks after all. But when he saw Fayt blink and witnessed the joy filled sentience flooding back into those bright green eyes at the sound of _his_ voice, Albel understood why he couldn't let the boy die. But the awakening had come too late and Fayt was still unaware of his own impending death. _Just a little farther . . ._

The full force of his body connected with Fayt's slender form. Gathering all of his strength, Albel shoved Fayt out of the dragon's path, but there was no chance to save himself. He felt the razor sharp claws tear through his flesh and the searing pain was accompanied by the cracking of bones unable to withstand the dragon's crushing power. He tried to scream, perhaps he succeeded but it was drowned out by an agonizing wail of despair. That was Fayt.

His battered body soared through the air until it hit the canyon wall with a sickening wet thud while more bones, he wasn't sure which ones, splintered on contact. The base of his skull smashed against the rock face and Albel lost himself to endless night. The swordsman's limp body slumped to the ground, as dead weight is wont to do, where it twitched once before lying still.

_No! It's not possible._ "ALBEL!" Fayt cried desperately but the other man did not move. His body remained where it had fallen, with crimson eyes now shut peacefully. Deep wounds wrapped around Albel's side and back, oozing blood and viscous fluids which were pooling beneath him at an alarming rate. Time stood still for Fayt as he was struck by the awful truth of what had just happened and he gave in to the sheer pain and intensity of his loss. The force of his emotions exploded within his slight body and everything changed.

His mind became crystal clear. Fuelled by desolation and rage, Fayt opened the gates of destruction. His mind was a placid lake, and dwelling within it was calm resignation to what must be done. Senses heightened, he could hear the whispers of power within him which begged for their freedom and resulted in tiny ripples spreading across the surface of his calm. The power flowed then. Like a raging river it flooded his senses and roared past the barriers which had been placed inside him long ago.

His body was on fire. Every nerve burned itself raw as the wave of energy passed through him, forcing its way to the front of his consciousness and he released it, allowing the blast to overtake him. It controlled him. He couldn't resist even if he had wanted to.

"_This power! What is it?"_ The dragon never learned what hit him. Its body was vaporized instantly by the pillar of light.

_Vengeance. _But the power continued to flow, still driven by grief and loss as well as something new. Deep within in him was the desire for self-destruction. Why had Albel done it? Another life had been sacrificed so that he could live, but what good was life if you were alone? There would be nothing but emptiness.

Giving himself a mental shake, Fayt snapped back to reality. His energy was draining fast and if he didn't stop his life force would be sent out with the beam of power. If this was allowed to happen, the devastation would encompass the planet as Destruction imploded. Even if he wanted to die, he could not endanger the planet's inhabitants by ending his life that way. Willing himself to stop, the power ceased to flow, and Fayt crumpled to the ground. He was exhausted, but at least this time he hadn't lost consciousness.

Using the last seeping bits of his remaining strength, Fayt dragged his weary body to lie beside his fallen companion. If he was going to die, he did not want to die alone. _Let them find us together._ Resting his head on Albel's chest, Fayt closed his eyes in satisfaction and let the darkness of oblivion overtake him.

ooooo

**A/N:** Hmm. Things got a little emotional in this one but don't worry. I know that was a little out of character but you can't expect Albel to just sit back and watch Fayt get killed, right? At least I hope he wouldn't, or else the story would have been really short.


	3. In the Wake of Destruction

**Title: **Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 3:** In the Wake of Destruction

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Star Ocean.

**A/N:** This one took a bit longer than expected and not just because I've been busy working on things for school. Some parts had been jotted down, but others just magically appeared when I was typing it up so it kept getting longer. But all that's over now and here's the result!

ooooo

Feeling lightheaded, Albel slowly revived from his unconscious state and curiously assessed his situation. No longer were they surrounded by steep walls. The canyon was gone and only the small portion where Albel had been leaning was untouched. _What the hell happened? _Albel scanned the sky for any ships. He knew from experience that they were the only things which could cause this level of devastation. And where had the dragon gone? Had it fled a new attacker or . . . ?

Albel's attention was torn away from his thoughts when he realized that something was pressing against him. Looking down, Albel was surprised to see that atop his chest rested an exhausted Fayt. At first glance, Albel thought that the boy was dead but soon he became aware of a second heart beating in time with his own and he sighed with relief.

In response to the sudden movement, Fayt stirred against him and Albel winced as the boy unknowingly aggravated his injuries. Emerald eyes fluttered open, and as they focused looked up, fixing their gaze upon his own.

"ALBEL! You're alive!" Tears welled up in Fayt's eyes as he spoke, and each word was saturated with happiness that Albel just could not understand.

_Why does he look at me like that . . . ? _Albel frowned and Fayt's smile faded, only to be replaced with concern.

"Albel, what's wrong?"

For a little while, Albel had felt rejuvenated once he knew that Fayt was alright, and his own exhaustion had protected him from feeling anything, but now the pain returned in full force as his body reawakened and it did not hesitate to remind him that things were not at all well.

"Get off, fool!" Had Fayt already forgotten that he had been wounded?

"But I was just . . . " _Happy to see you._ In truth, Fayt had forgotten momentarily once he had discovered that Albel had survived and could think of nothing else, but when the Wicked One spoke again, Fayt understood.

Albel clamped his eyes shut, and groaned painfully through gritted teeth. "Get . . . off . . . or . . . I'll . . . kill . . . you. You're hurting me! Stupid maggot."

Sensing the other man's urgency, Fayt removed himself from the comfort of Albel's body and in doing so revealed the total extent of the damage. Unable to control himself, Fayt gasped in horror at the sight of his companion.

"That bad, huh?" Albel asked softly, as a weak smile of resignation appeared on his face. _Fayt is safe_, he thought grimly, _but I'm not going to make it . . . Heh, I never thought it would end like this . . ._

Fayt heard the defeat in his companion's voice and in frustration he shook his head angrily. "Damn it Albel, don't you dare give up!" But secretly, Fayt had his own doubts as gave things a closer inspection.

Albel's upper body was actually a couple of shades darker than his shirt,and the exposed skin was almost completely covered in a kaleidoscope of black and purple bruises. His midsection was torn open, and only bloody, gaping holes were left where flesh should have been while strips of tattered skin where the dragon's claws had grazed him hung loose around each wound.

Albel's internal organs were miraculously untouched, but they had been left exposed and the whole scene reminded Fayt of a botched dissection. Internal anatomy was _not_ supposed to be visible when the subject was still alive after all. It was still surprising though, and the only explanation Fayt could offer was that the blow had not been as accurate as it had seemed.

After hehad passed out, thepressure of Fayt's body had been enough to stop the bleeding, but without anything to prevent it, blood had started to flow once again. It was not gushing as it had been earlier, but Albel's condition was critical and if he lost even a small amount more it could be devastating. So Fayt frantically looked around for something which would make a suitable compress and was distressed to discover that the best option was Albel's skirt. It was the only thing large enough to wrap around the wound, and the sash which secured it to Albel's waist could easily be improvised to hold the bandage in place. That left only one problem; Convincing Albel that allowing Fayt to remove his clothing was absolutely necessary.

But Fayt did not have to ask the all-important question because Albel had been watching him, following his gaze and could almost read the thoughts which were racing through the boy's head. "Go ahead, worm. Do what you must. But if your hands start to wander, I'll cut them off."

The familiar tone in Albel's voice brought a hopeful smile to Fayt's lips. _If he still has enough energy to threaten me, than maybe he'll be alright. _"Hmph. You're hardly in a position to be making threats. There is no way you could follow that one up."

"I didn't say I'd do it now. For the moment you may keep them."

"How considerate of you. Really Albel, I think you're getting soft." Fayt sighed happily and set to work undoing and removing the red sash before tackling the daunting task of pulling down Albel's skirt. With trembling hands he grasped the waistband and slowly started to wriggle it off but to his dismay, Fayt encountered a small problem.

"What's taking so long, fool? If you hadn't noticed I'm bleeding to death here," Albel growled impatiently in an effort to hide his growing panic, fighting desperately to remain calm and disguise the pain in his voice. It hurt to speak, but if he had stopped Fayt would surely have gone into shock and lost his focus.

"It's stuck." Fayt replied simply. "Forgive me, Albel." While one hand clutched a handful of cloth, Fayt slid the second hand down the back of the other man's garment. Cheeks burning with embarrassment, the boy's fingers closed around Albel and proceeded to lift him gently off the ground. Enraged at the invasion, Albel let loose a string of obscenities which was thankfully cut short when Fayt yanked the skirt loose and quickly released Albel from his grasp.

Albel's face flushed with something he hoped was rage and the glare he shot at Fayt would have been enough to permanently scar most people for life. "I could have lifted myself, maggot!" he roared.

"But it was caught on something. I had to dislodge it. And you shouldn't exert yourself unnecessarily." Fayt shook his head for emphasis as if what he said was the absolute and irrefutable truth. Knowing he didn't stand a chance of winning the argument, Albel sighed, leaned back and forced his tense muscles to relax. In all honesty, it hadn't been that bad, just unexpected.

Having achieved his purpose, Fayt quickly wrapped the fabric tightly around Albel's gaping wounds and shifted his attention to the next problem. Reaching out with both hands, Fayt continued his examination and began to search for broken bones.

The blue-haired boy felt an unfamiliar tingling sensation deep within him as he ran his hands along the length of Albel's body. The older man stiffened in response to Fayt's touch but Albel soon relaxed under the delicate exploration of his body and even blushed faintly when he realized that he was enjoying it. Pain mixed with pleasure and Albel shut his eyes, concentrating his attention on every sensation. Fayt pretended not to notice Albel's contentment, making sure that his face remained a mask of concern, but he smiled inwardly. _So he likes it when I touch him . . . and . . . I like it too. Interesting. _

"Does it hurt when I do this?" Fayt asked worriedly while exerting only the slighted bit of pressure against Albel's side.

Biting his lip against the pain, Albel nodded curtly and a thin trail of blood trickled down his chin. Albel winced as Fayt's deft hands moved higher and a distressed whimper managed to escape him despite the attempts to stifle any sounds which would expose his weakness.

"Let it out Albel. It's just the two of us, and I promise not to tell anyone." But the other man remained silent as if Fayt's reassurance had meant nothing to him and the boy was forced to fill the silence with his own voice. "Your ribs are broken, and judging from the angle, I'd say your good arm is broken too."

Albel still refused to answer him so Fayt kept talking. "You're lucky you know. That blow would have been enough to kill most people." _Still, I don't think it was meant to kill him. It was just enough to disable him so the creature could finish with me and still be able to torment Albel later._ Setting his thoughts aside where he wouldn't forget them, Fayt spoke again. "It could have been worse, but you're not out of the woods yet. If infection sets in . . . "

"I'm well aware of that, fool!" Albel snapped finally. "Just who do you think I am? It's not like I've never been injured before!"

"Yeah. I know. But something tells me you'd never allow yourself to be hurt this badly. You're much too strong for that." _This is all my fault._ Fayt thought dismally and he was reminded of the dragon's words. _Being near me is dangerous and if I stay with Albel any longer . . . he might not survive. I'll have to leave him when this is over. It's the only way._

"Feh, what do you know?" Albel scoffed. "This is nothing. I'll be fine so don't waste your time worrying about me. I don't need a maggot's pity."

"Can you move?" Fayt asked hesitantly, choosing to change the subject rather than respond to Albel's anger.

"Of course I can!" Cringing, Albel used his gauntlet arm to push his body off the ground and stood up, perhaps too quickly for his tired body because he promptly faltered and fell to his knees. "Damn it!" The words came out sounding like a frustrated growl deep in his throat and they were accompanied by a hint of disbelief. Albel the Wicked most certainly did not go around falling helplessly to the ground. But the fierce anger of disappointment was driven out of him by a wave of intense pain which washed over his body, and drowned his senses in misery. Unable to do anything else, Albel shut his eyes and groaned. Fayt was at his side immediately with an offer of assistance.

"You've lost too much blood Albel and your body is weaker than you think." Fayt knelt down in front of his wounded companion. "Climb on. I'll carry you back to town, okay?"

"You must be joking," Albel hissed. "I don't need your help. I don't need anyone's help." The words sprang from his lips as if the denial of aid was necessary before he could ever accept, but it was a weak protest and Albel knew it. He couldn't make it back on his own and though he was loath to admit it, he really did need Fayt.

"You're hurt Albel," Fayt pleaded quietly. "Please, just let me help you."

There was something strange in the boy's voice, quiet desperation perhaps, which finally won the battered swordsman over. "Fine, but I do this under protest, understand? And no one can ever learn of this. If anyone finds out, I'll kill you."

"Whatever you say Albel." At that moment, Fayt would have agreed to anything as long as Albel would cooperate.

In a slow, laboured motion, Albel draped his metal arm over Fayt's shoulders while the broken arm hung down at his side, as the boy looped his own arms around Albel's legs, hoisting the wounded man off the ground and onto his back. Fayt stood up slowly and allowed Albel to secure himself before taking a tentative step forward, being careful not to cause any unnecessary movements.

Though he was far from comfortable, Albel shut his eyes and rested his head against the back of Fayt's neck. Soft blue hair caressed him gently with every step Fayt took and Albel soon relaxed as he grew accustomed to the rhythm of the younger man's movements. _Perhaps this won't be so bad after all._

Since the canyon walls had been destroyed along with the dragon, the going was smooth for the most part and the ground sloped gently upwards but never became steep or impassible. As Fayt continued to descend the mountain he could feel Albel's hot breath on the back of his neck which would have been a great comfort to him if the other man's breathing had not been shallow and pained. Fayt knew that every inhalation must be like torture as Albel's lungs irritated his broken ribs and jostling against his back could not be that pleasant either but there was no other choice which was why Albel didn't complain. Fayt winced as Albel's claws dug into his chest, clutching him tightly as the pain worsened, the action mirroring his thoughts.

Just when Fayt thought things were as bad as they were going to get, he realized that the movement had reopened Albel's stomach wounds. Warm blood seeped through his shirt and squished against his back. His clothes were becoming saturated with blood and Fayt was becoming increasingly worried.

"Albel? Are you still awake?" But there was only heavy silence filling the air. "Albel! Answer me!"

The weight on his back shifted uncomfortably and mumbled something in response. Greatly relieved, Fayt sighed and his body shook from the intensity of his momentary panic. He was feeling weak in the knees and it wasn't just because he feared for Albel's safety. Though he hadn't been physically injured, Fayt was still in bad shape himself. The energy blast had sapped most of his strength and up until now he had been able to proceed on adrenaline alone, but even that was starting to fail him.

As if noticing for the first time, Fayt saw that the sky above his head no longer shone with the brightness of midday. It was getting dark. A curtain of deep blue draped the sky and the stars which spread across it sparkled like diamonds. They had worked so hard to save those stars, and this intimate connection only enhanced their beauty in Fayt's eyes. Dark thoughts sliced through the happy memories though, andthe boy'sworries returned to pester him. It was getting late, that much was clear, but he had no idea how far they had come or how much further he had to go.

Exhaustion had begun to blur his vision and Fayt was stumbling in the dark without any sense of direction. At some point he had missed the entrance to the Kirlsa Caverns and turned down a long forgotten side trail which, as luck would have it, just happened to lead back into town. When he saw lights blinking in the distance, Fayt almost thought the stars had fallen from the sky but when he recognized them as the familiar glowing illumination of Kirlsa, joy embraced him and chased away his weakness.

"We're almost home Albel!" Fayt announced happily and smiled to himself. "Home" The word sounded so strange to him. _Yes, I'm home at last. There is nowhere else I want to be. _But the boy's epiphany was interrupted as Albel started to struggle against him.

"Let me down, fool."

"But Albel, you don't have the strength to . . ."

"I said, LET ME DOWN!" Albel raised his claws to Fayt's throat and treated the boy to a deadly caress. "Don't you remember our little chat earlier? No one can be allowed to see this! I want to walk into town without assistance."

Fayt's skin prickled. He couldn't see it, but he knew Albel was shooting an icy glare at the back of his head. There was no sense in fighting. The proud warrior would never allow him to win this battle. "Alright Albel. I understand. Just try not to overdo it, okay?"

"I'll be fine. I told you not to worry about me. I don't need or want your concern."

As Albel removed himself from Fayt, he saw the bloodstain which he had left on the boy's clothing. _Maybe he should be worried . . ._ But there was no stopping once he had started something. With his head held high, Albel sauntered into town as if nothing was wrong.

It was late and there were few people loitering in the streets, but those who still had business outdoors saw him and marveled at the strength of their Lord Albel. Some were distressed by his condition, noting the bloodstained clothing, tousled hair and limp arm which swung at his side, but since he acted as if nothing was wrong, the masses were appeased and sufficiently deceived.

Only Fayt could see how hard it was for him. He saw that the usually bright crimson eyes were glazed with fatigue and pain as heavy feet were forced to propel him forward. Sweat beaded on Albel's brow and drenched his bangs so that they stuck to his forehead. Several stray wisps fell into his eyes, further obscuring his vision.

All the while Fayt walked beside him, fighting to remain alert in case Albel showed any signs of failure, but as it turned out he was not needed. They progressed slowly, but eventually made it to the Storm Brigade mansion where worried soldiers greeted them with concern before guiding the pair into the parlor.

Once they were safely inside and the door had been shut behind them, Albel collapsed. His knees buckled, and he crumpled into a pathetic heap on the floor after finally losing his prolonged battle with exhaustion. Fayt screamed for a doctor before he too sank to the floor beside his companion. Trembling fingers reached out to press against Albel'sneck as Fayt desperately checked for a pulse and he was rewarded with a strong beat. Before he could revel in the satisfaction this brought him, Fayt was dragged away by two men in order to make way for Kirlsa's doctor who immediately ordered that Albel be taken to his room for further treatment. Fayt could only watch helplessly as his savior was carried up the staircase and disappeared from his view.

"Dear gods boy! What happened to the two of you?" The voice belonged to Woltar who had apparently been patiently waitingfor their return because he was still fully dressed. The old man stood over him with a look of genuine concern spread across his features. He was obviously expecting an answer, but Fayt ignored him and staggered to his feet in order to follow the others to the second floor.

Woltar rested a restraining hand on the distraught boy's shoulder and shook his head sadly. "I don't know what you've been through Fayt, but believe me when I say you can't help him anymore. The doctor will see to everything. I trust him and his skills. So for now, you must wait patiently. When things have calmed down, I will inform you immediately of the situation. Is that satisfactory?"

Fayt reluctantly nodded in agreement. "I will wait, but if anything happens I want to know about it."

"Of course. I wouldn't dream of withholding information from you." Woltar wrapped a strong arm around Fayt's shoulders and guided him toward the guestroom. "Come with me, boy. You are tired and I am certain that Albel would not be pleased if he knew you refused to rest because you were worried about him."

Too tired to resist, Fayt allowed himself to be led into his own room where he sought the comfort of his bed. Still wearing his soiled clothing, Fayt crawled under the covers and snuggled against a pillow briefly before sleep descended upon him.

ooooo

Later that night, Fayt was gently shaken by Woltar until he roused from his slumber. Blinking and rubbing his eyes sleepily, Fayt tried to remember what had happened. Had it all just been a bad dream? No, it was nothing of the sort and the thought of Albel's condition jolted him awake faster than anything else could have.

"Is something wrong?" Fayt asked anxiously, gripping his sheets so tight that his knuckles went white from the tension.

Woltar quickly allayed his fears. "Everything is fine, boy. Albel's wounds have been properly cleaned and sewn shut, while the broken bones were neatly reset as well. He will be alright. All he needs now is a long period of rest in order to give the injuries time to heal."

"Can I see him?"

Nodding calmly, Woltar replied. "He is currently awake, and I believe that a brief visit will not be harmful. I think he has something to ask you as well, so be prepared." The old man smiled warmly and Fayt instantly felt much better. "There is one more thing Fayt. I have a question of my own for you to answer."

Confusion settled on the boy's face and he frowned at Woltar's words. _What could he possibly want from me?_

"Albel told me what happened when you confronted the mysterious creature and there was something that bothered me. It seems that he chose to protect you and in the process was injured himself, correct?"

"Yes . . . Is that the question or is there something else?"

"I won't mince words with you. I believe that Albel has opened his heart to you in the only way he knows how, by using his strength to keep you safe. Will you accept him knowing that it will be difficult for the fool to ever express himself? He will continue to treat you poorly and vehemently deny any attachment other than possession. I know it doesn't sound too appealing, but the other option is total rejection. If you don't want to deal with him, then sever all ties. Which will it be Fayt?"

"I would like to stay, but . . . my presence would only cause more problems. I'm better off alone. It's safer for everyone that way."

"So you would willingly stay here if it wasn't for those doubts, eh? I suppose that is better than nothing. Is there any chance that you would change your mind?"

"Anything is possible I guess . . . "

"Do consider it Fayt. I for one would enjoy having you around here a little longer, although it would be best if you chose to stay indefinitely." The old man winked at him and Fayt flushed at the praise.

Exiting his bed, Fayt flashed a bright smile at Woltar in thanks before heading out of his room and down the hall toward Albel's. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, Fayt eased the bedroom door open and peaked inside. Albel was lying in bed, with a multitude of bandages wrapped around his head and chest. The familiar armor had been removed completely, except for that ever present gauntlet, and Fayt couldn't suppress the rising curiosity which began to gnaw at him. He'd never seen Albel without that thing covering his arm and he was still no closer to discovering the reason why, but that issue could be addressed later. Right now though, Albel looked considerably weaker than Fayt was used to seeing and something about it caught him off guard. It hurt to see his companion like this, and knowing it was his fault only worsened Fayt's mood.

Red eyes turned and passed over him briefly before returning to their previous occupation of gazing at the ceiling. "Come here, worm."

Fayt opened the door wide so he could enter and gently shut it behind him. Obediently he crossed the room, settled down in the chair which someone had conveniently placed beside the bed and waited patiently for further instruction.

"Why did you hesitate today?" Albel asked suddenly. Dark red eyes met deep green ones and demanded an answer.

"What do you mean?"

"You were just standing there. When that beast spoke to you, what nonsense did it fill your head with?"

Knowing that he had nothing to lose by being honest, Fayt shared his deepest fear with the only person who had ever bothered to ask about it. He lowered his eyes and answered, his voice quivering with long repressed emotions. "It said that death follows in my footsteps. Anyone who comes near me, or gets too close, will be killed."

And Albel laughed at him. "It was right, you know," he said finally, still chuckling weakly.

Fayt squeezed his eyes shut and fought back tears. This was the real Albel. Sadistic and cruel, he enjoyed the pain and suffering of others. Hands clenched into fists and Fayt rose abruptly from his seat to leave but he seemed to waver for a moment. He wanted to storm out of the room, leave the town and get the hell off this sad excuse for a planet but something held him back. _And to think I had actually considered staying here! _

"I should have known you wouldn't understand. Goodnight Albel. I've had enough. I'm sorry you were hurt but that doesn't give you the right to laugh at my problems in order to make yourself feel better!" Fayt glared at him, hoping that some of his pain would register with the other man. He wanted Albel to regret his actions, but there was nothing in those ruby eyes that resembled sympathy, just selfish amusement.

"You're not listening, fool. I wasn't finished. The beast was right, but not in the way you're thinking." Albel's eyes glittered deviously and Fayt was compelled to hear him out. "_I_ _am_ Death, and I've followed you for a long time now. I gladly slaughtered your enemies because taking lives thrills me to no end and as long as you attract strong opponents, I want to stay near you. Death may be your companion Fayt, but you need not fear him. Death and Destruction are intimately linked, and one inevitably follows the other. That is the way of things and you must force yourself to acknowledge it."

The strength of Albel's conviction shocked him. He had never imagined that Albel had ever entertained thoughts such as these, but he was more surprised by the amount of sense they made. In a strange way, the words comforted him like nothing else would have been able to. _This must be Albel's version of sympathy . . . I think he's trying to comfort me._ Reclaiming his chair, Fayt sought to redeem his outburst by lightening the mood. "So that's the extent of our relationship? I'm still just glorified monster bait."

The comment brought a tired grin to the wicked warrior's face and Fayt smiled in return. Everything was back to normal. "Get some sleep Albel. You deserve it."

"Aren't you going to leave, fool?" Albel asked softly as his eyes began to shut.

"Not tonight Albel. You're stuck with me."

"A pity . . . " With these final words, Albel's eyes closed completely and his head pressed further into the pillows.

Fayt watched him sleep for a while, mesmerized by the rising and falling of Albel's chest, starting at every scowl or frown which twisted his calm features periodically but for the most part Albel slept peacefully. At some point, Woltar entered the room and Fayt turned to greet him.

"Why haven't you returned to bed Master Fayt?" Woltar asked him patiently, though he already knew what the answer would be.

"I-I don't want to leave him Woltar. No one should have to suffer alone."

"I see." The old man smiled knowingly and while he stood in the doorway, he could see Fayt's head droop slightly. He would not be awake for much longer. As Wolter watched, the blue-haired boy nodded off and fell forward in his chair, only to land on top of the sleeping Albel. Completely oblivious to what he was doing, Fayt snuggled closer. Albel's body was soft, warm, inviting, everything one could possibly want and Fayt was no exception. Using the other man as a living pillow, he sleptcontentedly.

_The poor boy's exhausted! Who can blame him for falling into such a precarious position?_ But the old man was hardly worried. He was actually incredibly pleased with how things were progressing.Woltar had lived a long time, but in all his years of experience watching youngsters fall in and out of love, he had never seen a stranger couple, or a more perfect match. _They suit one another, but it will be hard to convince them of this fact. _

"Pleasant dreams, Master Fayt," he whispered softly before excusing himself from the room. Woltar would need to be well rested if he was to take on the role of matchmaker. The old man chuckled absently to himself as he walked toward his own chambers. _There is much work to be done . . . _

ooooo

A/N: So there you have it! Nobody died and I was able to work in some gratuitous snuggling. XD


	4. Promises Broken

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 4:** Promises Broken

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Star Ocean, which I almost spelled as Satyr Ocean. I am now the not so proud owner of Satyr Ocean, since no one else wants it.

**A/N: **The chapter takes place roughly a week or two after chapter 3, if anyone's keeping track. Nothing exciting happened in that time. Assume that everyone slept. There was one incident of stick poking, but that would hardly make an exciting chapter (unless someone wants a chapter of nothing but poking the poor characters with sticks). There is no need to worry though. The offender has been punished.

Thanks again to everyone who reviewed! I love to hear nice things!

ooooo

During those first few days after the attack, Fayt had remained at Albel's side despite the other man's desire to be left alone, and made sure that his friend was comfortable, but when Fayt had completely recovered, Albel had insisted that he return to his duties. After much protesting, Fayt had conceded to the older man's wishes and he had to admit that it felt good to be useful once again.

As Fayt entered the town after finishing his morning scout of the area, he was greeted by friendly village faces. It seemed that word had spread concerning his heroic actions and the attention the villagers paid him was making Fayt uncomfortable. According to the story currently circulating around Kirlsa, he had single-handedly disposed of a monster which had posed a threat to the people's safety. This same beast had been so strong that it had laid up the town's best warrior for several days with terrible injuries and this only heightened their admiration of the unharmed Fayt. The villagers had no idea what power he had used and Fayt knew that if they ever found out he would become the monster.

Such was the story which had been spread, but he knew the truth of the matter. Albel had been injured protecting him. The thought that Albel had sacrificed his own safety for his sake shamed him, but at the same time the idea filled him with such warmth as he remembered his conversation with Woltar the night they returned. The realization that he had earned the affection of the coldest heart in Airyglyph pleased him more than anything else.

Unbeknownst to Fayt, Albel had been watching him from the Storm Brigade headquarters. His broken arm still rested in a sling, but his metal arm was raised toward the window he looked through with its claws resting upon the smooth surface, as if expressing an unspeakable longing for the subject of his gaze. Albel leaned closer to improve his view and his hot breath fogged against the glass in puffs of intrigue.

He watched with interest as Fayt adeptly handled the villagers, accepting their congratulations and praise, smiling with the kind of warmth and kindness he could never hope to muster. Albel thought the commoners should be scorned for their weakness and inability to defend themselves, which is why he couldn't help but be impressed at how well Fayt handled the situation.

Fayt had become their hero, and he humoured them by listening to their inane comments, shaking hands, and assuring them that the trouble was past. Only Albel could see how he longed to escape from the adoring crowd of people and return to the mansion. But what shocked him the most was seeing that the smile Fayt gave to the villagers, while sincere, was nothing compared to what Albel was used to receiving. _Is it my imagination, or does he reserve his brightest smiles for me? _Albel's brow furrowed in confusion immediately after the thought entered his head. _It shouldn't matter to me, but it does. I wonder why? _

Albel was so preoccupied with watching Fayt that he didn't notice that Woltar had entered the room he occupied and was observing him curiously. The old man remained silent, content to let Albel enjoy himself for just a little while longer. He could guess what it was, or rather whom it was that had attracted and held the other man's attention. It gladdened him to see that Albel was learning to care for someone other than himself, albeit slowly. Finally Woltar broke the silence and addressed the wistful swordsman.

"You care deeply for the boy, don't you? Enough to sacrifice your own health for his sake hmm?"

Albel whirled around in surprise to face the intruder but he quickly looked away in order to hide the embarrassed blush which had spread across his face as a result of being discovered. _How long has that maggot been watching me and how the hell did he guess my train of thought? _In a vain attempt to escape Woltar's interrogation Albel answered the question with one of his own.

"What makes you say that?" He stammered defiantly.

"Oh I don't know. Perhaps it's the way your eyes light up when he enters a room, or your reaction when he says your name with such kindness. Or maybe it's because you are spending your free time ogling him like an infatuated schoolgirl."

Albel blanched as he said this but made no effort to deny it. Before long, Woltar continued.

"His cheerfulness always seems to bring such shock to your face. It is really quite amusing, to think that anyone would be so happy to see _you_ of all people. It really makes him hard to ignore doesn't it?"

"Stop spouting nonsense!" Albel had recovered his usual colour and was fully prepared to defend himself against Woltar's barrage of invasive questions.

But Woltar would not be dismayed that easily. He had heard it all before. "You cannot help having feelings for him, can you?"

"Silence!" Shaking with fury, Albel raged against the suggestion. It was too close to the truth for his liking and there was no way he would ever admit to such a thing. He couldn't even admit it to himself. "Do not push me, old man. You cannot possibly know how I feel." _Even I don't know . . ._

"So tell me about your feelings Albel. If you feel nothing then why did you protect him?"

"What difference does it make? Consider it a lapse in judgement."

"Be honest Albel. There must be something which prompted such uncharacteristic behaviour. It's not like you to act in such a way. Think it over for a moment. What is it about the boy that you felt was worth saving?"

Having regained his composure, Albel answered him seriously with the safest response he could devise. "He is the only one who has ever professed a desire to stay with me without wanting something in return. When we faced the beast, I knew he was afraid. He was well aware that it would be dangerous, but he wouldn't leave my side. I still can't understand his choice, but at the time it pleased me. I suppose I admired his foolish determination."

_There have been others_, Albel remembered bitterly. Some had looked at him with lust in their eyes and manner, but he knew that they only wanted to take from him briefly. There were none who would willingly remain by his side for any length of time, not after they learned just how damaged he was. Those who desired him at first soon came to fear his cruelty, yet Fayt had accepted him and his flaws without question even after everything he had done to the boy and his friends. Fayt knew the things he was capable of and still stood by him. This alone made him worthy of Albel's protection.

Unsatisfied, and sensing that Albel was still holding some of his thoughts back, Woltar prompted him for more information. "So he refused to abandon you, eh? Is that all?"

Albel hesitated briefly and considered the question. _Is that really the only reason? _"Perhaps, there is more," he admitted warily, hoping that Woltar would not question him further but the older man was not about to let the issue drop, especially if Albel seemed even the slightest bit willing to discuss things. Besides, there was no one else whom Albel could confide in and Woltar was determined to help him work through this.

"Does it have something to do with how Fayt feels about you?"

Albel blinked in surprise. He had never considered Fayt's motivations, only his own, but now warm memories came flooding back to him. "I know he doesn't hate me . . . He accepts what I am."

Albel's mind drifted back to past experiences with the boy and in every scenario Fayt had been good to him. Throughout their travels, Fayt had been the only one in their group who had ever made an effort to befriend him. He had always been able to speak freely with the younger man without fear of condemnation and Fayt had listened to his opinions when no one else would. He was more to Fayt than just a man with a penchant for murder and a blood fetish. He was a trusted friend.

"Have you ever considered the possibility that Fayt loves you Albel, despite your imperfections? Can you name anyone else, besides me, who actually enjoys your company?"

Blood red eyes momentarily widened in surprise at the mention of love, but soon narrowed into a state of sad contemplation. Eventually, Albel shook his head fiercely as if the suggestion bothered him. "Fayt doesn't hate me. That is hardly comparable to love."

"Then why do you suppose he is willing to stay here, hmm?" _Good gods, are they both so blind to the other's feelings, or are they just too stubborn to admit it?_

"He claims to be bored with life. Apparently things are more exciting for him here. I too am bored, and he helps to alleviate that." Albel's tone remained emotionless as he spoke, careful not to let anything slip which could be misconstrued as attachment to that boy. _Fayt is just a distraction, nothing more _he told himself, but it hardly sounded convincing.

Unimpressed by his answer, Woltar continued to press the issue. "Do you _really_ think that life is more exciting here with youthan travelling through the stars on one of those celestial ships? It seems highly unlikely that there is anything on this planet which would interest someone who has the capabilities to explore anywhere he wishes."

Albel refused to be lured by Woltar's subtle taunts and continued to speak with total confidence in his assertions. "I believe he has grown tired of that life and has begun to seek something more than aimless travel." _He called this place "home." I wonder if that is what he wants. What constitutes a home though?_

"I see. So he wants to start a new life here _with you_?" Woltar chuckled merrily. "Yes, I suppose that is possible."

Albel couldn't miss the meaning of those words and he glared furiously at the older man. _How dare he insinuate such a thing?_ "Just what are you suggesting, fool?" Albel argued angrily. "We are not a couple of lovesick newlyweds as you so desperately wish to imply!"

Woltar smiled sadly in response to Albel's angry denial. It was time to up the ante. "I suppose you don't realize the extent of his devotion, do you?"

"What do you mean by that?" Albel asked with genuine curiosity.

"Tell me Albel, what happened to the monster after it attacked you?"

"I don't know," he said honestly. After all, he had lost consciousness the moment his head had connected with the stone wall of the crevasse. "I guess I assumed it gave up and wandered off . . . " Even Albel realized how unrealistic that had sounded but he could think of no other explanation for the beast's disappearance.

"And what would you say if I told you that the boy defeated it single-handedly? You were injured when you finally awoke, so I supposed you didn't notice the extent of the damage Fayt had caused. Not a trace of the beast was left."

"But that's impossible! If Fayt had the power to defeat it, why didn't he do so in the first place?"

"Simple Albel, it's because his power is uncontrollable."

"What are you suggesting? If he can't control it, how could he use it?" Albel was getting impatient. Why did Woltar always string him along like this instead of coming right to the point?

"You are confused because you spent the end of the war in the dungeon. You missed something important and I suppose Fayt has never really told you. He's probably afraid of your reaction to him. As you may already know, our war with Aquaria was cut short due to the invasion of a third party."

"The Vendeeni?"

"Correct! But do you know what happened to the ship after it killed Vox and decimated both armies?"

Albel didn't know, the subject had never come up. After he had been released from the dungeon there were greater threats to be dealt with. The first ship was gone and that was all he cared about. "I assumed it had left after the damage had been done . . . "

"Wrong again Albel, but it's not your fault. You should know though, that it was Fayt who destroyed it."

"What?" Albel was in disbelief. While he could almost believe Fayt was capable of killing a mere beast, he just couldn't imagine that the boy could defeat something like the sky ship. And if it was true, why had they gone to all the trouble of battling Crosell to make such a small assault on the second ship?

Woltar was speaking again so Albel listened intently, "I wish you had been there to see it, boy. It was both beautiful and terrible at the same time. After devastating our forces, the ship also attacked the Aquarians. Supposedly one of Fayt's good friends was mortally wounded in the blast. While people were dying all around him, the boy came to learn the truth about himself, part of it anyway. The ships had come because of him. Everyone was dying because of his presence. The guilt and pain were too much for him to bear and he lost control, unleashing the deadliest force I've ever seen. The sky ship was completely destroyed. All because Fayt was upset over causing the deaths of his friends and strangers."

"And you're certain this was all Fayt's doing?" Albel asked suspiciously. "So what does this have to do with me exactly?"

"I know it's hard to believe but hear me out. From what you have told me, the boy carries a strange gene, correct? The gene of . . . "

"Destruction," Albel finished for him, finally understanding the implications of Fayt's childhood gene alteration. He had known the boy possessed something strange, but he had never realized that the gene had made Fayt into a weapon. The boy was strong, stronger than most, so Albel had believed that was the extent of the gene's power. But now . . . _So what I told him that night about death and destruction was even more profound than I had ever imagined!_

"Anyway, I will come to my point soon enough, be patient Albel. The gene's power is only released when the boy becomes intensely emotional or desperate and when there are no options left for salvation. When Fayt, or something important to him is in danger, the gene's power takes over. So when the boy saw you sacrifice yourself for his sake, taking the blow meant for him, his emotions activated the dormant gene. It was the fear of losing _you_ Albel, and the grief and guilt of causing your death, which made him lose control and incinerate his enemy. It's a shame you were not awake to see it."

For once in his life, Albel was speechless. Woltar seemed to think that Fayt's feelings for him were deeper than the guarded warrior had ever realized and it was making him feel something in return. After all, something deep inside his own heart had prompted him to protect Fayt that day, and maybe it was something more than just respect or selfish pride. Albel moved slowly toward the door, intending to return to his own room and reflect on what he had just learned, but before he could leave, Woltar addressed him one last time.

"Listen carefully, Albel. There is something else you should know about Fayt. That first night when you both returned here, he refused to leave your side. I tried coaxing him into the other room to get some rest, but he was too worried and couldn't sleep anyway. It's not that he thought you were in any danger, far from it. Rather, he thought you would feel better and recover faster knowing that you were not alone."

Albel shrugged. "Sentimental fool," he muttered to himself quietly so Woltar wouldn't hear, and stalked out of the room. He already knew Fayt had stayed with him that night. He remembered feeling uncomfortable and waking up, only to discover that the younger man had collapsed across his chest. He had been so weak that night he wouldn't have been able to remove the boy even if he had wanted to. But strangely enough, Albel hadn't minded having Fayt so close to him. _Besides_, Albel thought wistfully, _the fool had looked so peaceful as he slept that I just didn't have the heart to wake him_. By morning, Fayt had already disappeared, only to return later with breakfast and Albel never mentioned the incident. Fayt still believed that his mistake had gone unnoticed and Albel would let him continue to think that way, while he alone cherished the memory.

As he left the room, Albel heard a door open and close downstairs, signalling Fayt's return. The sound of the closing door interrupted his revery and distracted the swordsman from his destination. Instead of turning down the hallway toward his own room, Albel's feet turned as if they had a will of their own, or perhaps just a hidden agenda, and started to carry him along the path heading for Fayt's room.

As he passed the staircase which led to the first floor, he could hear muffled voices from the lobby which assured him that Fayt was currently occupied so he would be able to slip into the boy's room and wait there for his return. Albel paused and listened to the conversation for a moment and though he couldn't hear any specific words, the tone was unmistakable. Fayt continued to talk casually to the guards, and Albel could hear the calm in their voices as they spoke. Fayt had that effect on people. He could put everyone around him at ease without even thinking about it.

Breaking away from his eavesdropping, Albel let himself into Fayt's room through the unlocked door and situated himself on the boy's bed. Sitting down, he crossed his legs and began to twitch nervously, with one leg bouncing the other up and down unconsciously as he waited impatiently for Fayt's return, still not altogether certain why he was even there.

Several minutes later, Fayt entered the room unceremoniously and started to peel off his sweat drenched clothing while smiling to himself as he reflected upon the day's activities. He was almost finished unzipping his vest when he noticed that he wasn't alone. Fayt froze instinctively and shot a puzzled look at Albel who was currently watching him with unreadable eyes and he shivered in spite of himself. _I didn't even see him. I'm going to get one hell of a lecture._

But a reprimand was the last thing on Albel's mind as his gaze assessed the boy's outer appearance and had to admit that he looked decidedly unFaytlike. Speckled with blood and bits of monster flesh as he was, Fayt would probably have disgusted most people. But Albel was anything but disgusted. For someone like him, the combination of blood, sweat, and death was a recipe for arousal and he couldn't avert his eyes. They traced over the younger man's form, noting the muscles which rippled underneath the modest clothing as Fayt arched his back and stretched in order to loosen them. But his appreciation was cut short when the blue-haired boy turned to address him.

"Um, can I help you?" Fayt asked hopefully while running a nervous hand through his hair, obviously uncertain and slightly curious about Albel's presence in his room.

"Not likely," Albel grumbled by means of a reply.

Fayt frowned in confusion. "Then why are you here?"

Albel fidgeted with his claws for a moment as he flexed long dormant brain muscles which were in charge of polite conversation. "How did things go today?" he asked awkwardly, and quietly cursed himself for forgetting the usual accompanying insult.

"Since when do you care?" Fayt asked hesitantly. The boy's eyes clouded with concern and he quickly followed the question with another. "Are you feeling alright Albel? You're not fevered or anything, are you? Are your wounds bothering you? Would you like me to dress them for you?"

"Be quiet! There's nothing wrong with me, fool. And I don't care. I'm just curious. But if it makes you uncomfortable I'll leave. I didn't come here to argue."

"Then why did you come here?" Fayt asked patiently.

"I'm bored," he confessed. It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't really true either. Woltar's insights had troubled him and Albel's head was still struggling with several issues. He looked at Fayt with dull eyes and watched as the boy's face flooded with understanding.

"You're restless, aren't you Albel?" Fayt asked him kindly as he sat down beside his moody guest without even a hint of hesitation. "Being cooped up in here with nothing to kill must be hard on you. How about I give you a full report?" Albel shrugged in agreement and Fayt began to describe the morning battles. "First there was a group of wolves outside the town harassing traders, so I had to deal with them . . . "

As Fayt spoke enthusiastically about his kills of the day, Albel grew more and more interested. Shutting his eyes, Albel could picture every scenario Fayt described and one might even say he was excited at the image of Fayt's unrestrained bloodlust. It was obvious that the blue-haired boy had no qualms about killing, as long as it was necessary and the joy he gained from battle was almost a match for his own. When Fayt was finished, Albel asked the one question which had been bothering him.

"So you like living here . . . ?" he asked tentatively.

Fayt nodded with exuberance. "Of course I like it here!"

"But why do you want to stay with me?" Albel glanced at Fayt and would have looked away but the boy's cheerful green eyes caught his own and held him captive.

If the question had caught him off guard, Fayt didn't show it, and he answered almost immediately as if he had already thought long and hard on the matter. "I can't really explain why I like being here with you Albel. It just feels right. I know that sounds strange, but I've never felt this comfortable with anyone else."

"Not even the pink maggot?" Albel added with a sneer.

"Sophia?" Fayt shrugged. "To be honest, she makes me nervous sometimes and the whole clingy act gets annoying after a while. She wants too much from me and I'm not prepared to give in to her whims."

"But I thought you were in love with her, though for reasons I cannot comprehend. Wouldn't you rather stay close to a loved one?" Albel asked. He was frowning and obviously perplexed because he couldn't even follow through on his own logic. Fayt should stay with a loved one, and that made perfect sense, but he couldn't connect that thought to the fact that Fayt was staying with him.

"Maybe I did love her, but that was before . . ." Fayt glanced at Albel briefly, flushed, and dropped his eyes southward in order to examine a spot on his shoe before his enquirer could notice. "Ah, I mean she was always like a little sister to me. Sweet but immature, you know? I felt responsible for her, but now that she's safe I'm free to do as I please."

"And what pleases you?" Albel asked cautiously.

"Isn't it obvious?" Fayt smiled warmly at him and Albel trembled slightly, confused by the boy's intense kindness. He would have said something but Fayt was not finished.

"You treat me like a regular person. When we speak, you don't hold anything back. You're completely honest, and blunt about things and I respect that. The others treat me differently because they know that I'm– " Fayt stopped himself abruptly before he gave away too much information. Albel had never seen what he was capable of and he wanted the other man to stay ignorant of his destructive power.

Albel didn't miss the sudden pause and he knew what it was that Fayt didn't want to mention. "Woltar told me about you. I know about your power, Fayt."

Fayt's smile quickly faded and eyes filled with terror which was soon joined by despair. They had been sitting close together but Fayt moved away, feeling suddenly uncomfortable. "Does it bother you?" he asked meekly. "I'm a weapon, after all. I can't control it, and I could hurt you. Everyone else worries because of what I am."

"Of course it bothers me." Albel replied mercilessly. Fayt wilted at his comment and Albel couldn't comprehend the depths of the boy's sadness at his answer. _Is _this_ his weakness?_

"It bothers me because I can never become stronger than you, that's all. I'm not afraid of you, if that's what you were thinking. Why should I fear a weak little maggot who would be dead now if it wasn't for my protection, hmm?" The swordsman chuckled wickedly and shot a victorious grin toward Fayt but he quickly sobered when he noticed that the look on the younger man's face was pained and creased with worry. For a short time, Fayt had forgotten the vow he had made to himself the night they had returned, but now his doubts were back with a vengeance.

"Don't be so casual about that Albel. You almost died because of me and that's why . . ." Fayt took a deep breath before continuing. "Once you've recovered, I'll be leaving."

In that moment, Albel felt his fragile new world of companionship crumble around him. The fragments of pleasure and wisps of happiness which he had gathered close to himself during Fayt's stay were scattered by a breeze of disbelief. His life was at a dead end on Elicoor, but having Fayt with him had made it somewhat bearable. While they had been together, he had always been able to claim indifference to the boy's presence because Fayt's absence was not something he was prepared to deal with, or accept. He had been lulled into a false sense of security by Fayt's kindness and he had honestly believed that the young man would remain with him.

For the first time in years he had let his guard down and allowed someone to enter his private sphere of tolerance. He had compromised his ethics and this was his reward? Anger rose to the surface and whispered taunts of betrayal. _He said he'd never leave! I shouldn't have trusted him. There is no one I can trust. _Locking the pain of loneliness away where it had always been, Albel forced himself to speak. He would be heartless. It was the only way to keep disappointment at bay. "Do as you please, fool," he hissed. "I won't stop you."

Fayt watched him sadly, clearly upset by Albel's sudden callous behaviour and his eyes became moist as tears threatened to fall. _I didn't expect that reaction. I thought he might try to stop me. I guess he doesn't care after all._

Albel instantly regretted his actions when he saw Fayt become teary eyed over his words and he searched in vain for a way to ease the pain he had caused. _I can't let it end like this. I don't want to hurt him _that_ badly._ Sighing deeply, Albel spoke again. "Where will you go?" he asked, defeat plain in his voice.

"I haven't decided yet. Perhaps I'll find a nice underdeveloped planet where no one knows who I am, or what I am."

"You want to be alone then?" _You don't deserve to be alone._

"I don't _want_ to be alone. I'd like to stay here but I know it will be best for everyone if I keep to myself. I don't want anyone else to get hurt because of me. I'm a liability to you Albel. I know how much you hate weakness so until I become stronger, I can't stay here"

Albel scoffed bitterly at his reasoning. "Self-imposed exile, eh? How noble." Acid dripped from his words and he shook his head angrily before continuing. "Fool! You're always thinking of others before yourselfas if this was some happy little dream world where you're the hero who has to save the lives of everyone around you through self sacrifice. It makes me sick. Did you ever stop to consider the feelings of the people you would leave behind?"

_Feelings?_ "Albel, do you want me to stay?" Fayt asked quietly, eyes begging the other man to give him a reason.

"Of course I want you to stay. Airyglyph could always use another strong fighter," Albel said dismissively, waving his clawed hand for emphasis.

"I don't want to stay for Airyglyph. It means nothing to me." Fayt was treading on the emotional equivalent of thin ice and he knew it, but he needed to be absolutely sure that he was wanted.

_Tch. _Albel looked away and his voice dropped to a barely audible whisper. "Stay with me." The words sounded strange and completely unfamiliar, but he didn't regret them.

"Do you mean that?" Fayt asked skeptically, wondering if he had heard correctly.

"I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it, maggot!" Albel grumbled, some of the familiar edge creeping into his voice.

Fayt chuckled softly at the other man's defensive behaviour. "If you feel that strongly about it, I'll stay. Being with you is something I want as well, as long as you're certain I won't be a burden to you."

"I never said you wouldn't be a burden." Albel taunted him, as contentment settled over the swordsman once again. "But at least you are an _amusing_ burden."

Fayt smiled inwardly at the other man's apparent relief. Albel's happiness was obvious to one who understood his backhanded compliments. _Perhaps staying together is well worth the risk of injury, or even death, for him. He's been alone for so long . . . _

Albel gave his companion that patented wicked grin and Fayt was struck by how much it pleased him to see the other man enjoying himself, even though he was typically the unwilling cause of that enjoyment. _It's rare for him to show his pleasure, but when he does, it's breathtaking. _Lost in his thoughts, Fayt didn't notice that his companion had ceased his gloating and was currently glaring at him.

"Stop that, worm!" Albel said as his features twisted back into the usual scowl.

"Stop what Albel?" Fayt asked with as much innocence as he was capable of producing, which just happened to be a hell of a lot.

"Leering at me like an idiot." He accused the green-eyed youth. Apparently Albel had become immune to Fayt's innocence.

"I was not!" Fayt cried out indignantly.

Unconvinced, Albel swatted the younger man in the back, sending him tumbling to the floor. In an embarrassed huff, the swordsman stood, stepped over Fayt's prostrate body carelessly, and made his way out the bedroom door. Albel turned and called over his shoulder one final comment. "Grovelling looks good on you Fayt. I'll expect much more of that for allowing you to stay with me."

Fayt sighed, and his eyes followed the retreating back of his companion, watching lazily as hair tails swung behind the other man in silent mockery. _I bet he'll never admit that _he_ asked _me_ to stay. Maybe I was wrong about him. But then again, I wouldn't have it any other way._

ooooo

**A/N:** I didn't like how parts of this turned out (like the beginning, heh), but it's done and I'm glad.


	5. Happiness Is

Title: Heaven Beside You

Chapter 5: Happiness Is . . .

Disclaimer: I don't own Star Ocean.

A/N: It's time for chapter 5, and I know what you're thinking. It's been five chapters already and not even one kiss! When are things going to heat up? Give me a few more chapters. It'll be worth the wait. I promise a drunken Albel (He's a mean drunk by the way), a weepy Sophia, and a few unexpected complications . . . like Cliff. :D

This one's a bit short, but I've got my reasons . . .

ooooo

It had been several weeks since Fayt had decided to stay in Airyglyph and life was slowly returning to normal. With his wounds all but a distant memory, Albel was back in fine form. But when his strength returned, so had the same distant behaviour with regards to Fayt as he had displayed when the boy first arrived. Heartfelt confessions were nowhere to be found and Fayt was beginning to wonder if Albel had meant any of the things he had said.

But he could not afford to think of such things now. They had both been recalled to Airyglyph for a special mission and were currently staying in the castle proper. While Fayt was not an official citizen of Airyglyph, nor a member of the military, he willingly worked alongside Albel whenever the king made a special request. He maintained that he was merely repaying the king for his generosity, andfor allowing him to stay in the kingdom but the truth was he didn't want Albel going into danger alone.

There wasn't much chance of danger today though, since they had only been ordered to do a routine survey of the Airyglyph mountain range, checking for monsters, weather damage, the usual. Fayt was even looking forward to the trip. It meant spending more quality time with Albel and that thought was enough to make him chuckle happily to himself as he made preparations for their excursion. The noise drew Albel's attention away from the map he was studying and he turned to look at Fayt.

"What's so funny, maggot?" he snapped.

"Nothing Albel," Fayt replied placidly.

"Then why were you laughing? I don't see anything worth laughing about. We're being sent on a mission that any weakling could do. There's no challenge, no excitement, just cold weather."

"Are you finished?" Fayt said dryly, giving his friend a disinterested glance. Fayt was pushing buttons and he knew it, but messing with Albel's head was just too much fun, and sometimes he just couldn't resist. There was no way he could ever tell Albel that the Arzei's request was designed to be a recovery mission. It was meant to be something simplistic which would ease Albel back into active duty without seeming too sympathetic. Albel was about to continue when he realized Fayt was mocking him.

"You dare mock me, maggot!" Albel roared. Drawing his blade from its sheath, Albel held it up to Fayt's throat, fully intending to make the blue-haired boy regret his actions. Albel the Wicked would not be trifled with.

Fayt knew he should have been trembling with fear, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. He humoured Albel enough when it came to this sort of thing.

"C'mon Albel, you know I didn't mean it. Can't you take a joke? Geez."

The annoyance was plain in his voice and the force behind it stopped Albel cold. Slowly he withdrew his sword and stalked away. "You're not worth the effort, fool . . . " he muttered before exiting the room and slamming the door behind him.

Fayt smiled to himself. No matter what Albel threatened him with, he knew it was just an act. Enough had passed between them to show him that Albel really did care about him, although the admissions were few and far between. The only way Albel _could_ express himself was through taunts and threats. _Maybe someday_, Fayt mused to himself, Albel would change and they would become closer, but for now he would humour the swordsman as best as he could in the hopes that his efforts would pay off.

ooooo

Meanwhile, Albel had exited the castle after deciding that a brisk walk around town would clear his head and calm his anger. Unfortunately it wasn't doing much good because he was still furious and confused. He paced through the city, shooting death glares at any foolish citizen who happened to look his way and desperately wished that there was something around for him to stab since he had been unable to skewer Fayt like he had intended.

_How could I let anyone treat me like that and live?_ It went against everything he stood for. If a stranger had addressed him in such a manner, he would have cut them down without a second thought, but when it was Fayt he just couldn't do it. His inaction was bad enough, but Albel soon found that his mind was preoccupied with something else.

He was upset, and not just because Fayt had become angry with him. He was also displeased with himself for causing the boy's seemingly bad mood. Was Fayt truly disgusted with him? He had only been voicing his honest thoughts, and acting as he normally would. Hadn't Fayt praised him for that very trait of brutal honesty? So why had that wretch become annoyed with him?

"Hmph," Albel muttered to no one in particular. He was thinking too much, wasting his time analysing Fayt. _It's unnecessary, pointless . . . so why can't I stop? Why does that fool's opinion of me matter so much?_ Besides, wasn't Fayt the one who was treating him badly, and taking him for granted? Fayt wasn't afraid of him anymore, or perhaps he had never been afraid. _Isn't that what I wanted? _His heart whispered gently, but before the thought could take hold, it was pushed away.

Albel cursed himself, he had been too soft on the boy lately and Fayt had become spoiled. That must be it and the relief this revelation brought him was immeasurable. He could solve the problem with a little tough love . . . er not _love_ though, that was a poor choice of words. Perhaps a tough beating, or something similar would make the boy think twice about challenging him. If Fayt thought he was in control of their current relationship, he was sadly mistaken. Albel smiled deviously, confident that Fayt's arrogance would become a thing of the past. Satisfied, Albel finished his walk and turned back toward the castle, intending to do a little extra training before they left.

ooooo

"Master Fayt? Sir Albel has returned. He is in the training yard and ready to leave whenever you are finished here."

"Thank you." Fayt dismissed the servant, gathered up the things he had packed, and headed outside. Standing in the doorway of the courtyard, Fayt immediately searched the area for Albel and it wasn't long before he spotted the other man who was angrily driving his sword through one of the practice dummies. Since Albel hadn't noticed him yet, he decided to remain quiet and watch his companion's training. _Just for a couple minutes_, he told himself and a small smile appeared on his face.

It was common knowledge that Albel could easily overpower anyone in the three military branches, so he trained by himself in the corner, apart from the others. It was the only way he could truly test the limits of his strength and not have to worry about injuring anyone.

_He's always alone . . . _, Fayt thought, and it saddened him to think that Albel really didn't have anyone else to rely on. Stray thoughts of desire prodded him unsuccessfully in an attempt to make the boy aware of the fact that he wanted to stay with Albel and ensure that the man was never lonely again, but he misinterpreted them as mere rumblings of friendship and they were quickly dismissed.

_I suppose I could join him, but he probably doesn't want me around after how I acted today. _Fayt was feeling guilty, and he didn't like it. Secretly he hoped that he would have the opportunity to make it up to the other man, but the chances of anything happening were mediocre at best.

Sweat was dripping from Albel's brow as he practised his swordplay. Without realizing what he was doing, Fayt's eyes wandered down to Albel's body and noticed that it too glistened with sweat, which accentuated his lithe, muscular form. Fayt's hands tightened on his bundle when he realized that he was currently assessing the painfully attractive qualities of his _male _companion. _What am I thinking? _Embarrassment painted his cheeks and a delightful shade of red appeared which only deepened when he realized that he didn't feel the least bit ashamed of his thoughts. Curious about his burgeoning feelings, Fayt turned his attention once again to their catalyst.

Albel was panting now, clearly out of breath and Fayt was also breathing harder but for entirely different reasons. Albel had been working so hard, yet exhilaration shone in his eyes, and it was obvious that he was enjoying himself. Fayt felt his body tingle with pleasure as he witnessed Albel's transformation from a brooding loner to an ecstatic warrior and he sighed contentedly. _I . . . I love it, when he's happy . . . _

Fayt's head was still foggy with half-formed thoughts of admiration when Albel turned around, and spotted him standing in the doorway. Shaking himself free of any lingering ideas, Fayt forced a smile as Albel strode over to meet him. _If he ever finds out what I've been thinking, he'll kill me . . ._

"Have you finished your preparations, worm?"

Fayt felt a lump rise in his throat as he struggled to answer the simple question and he blushed profusely under the scrutiny of Albel's gaze when he couldn't form a reply. Crimson eyes glittered with the familiar hint of amusement and a confident grin played across Albel's face as he misunderstood the reason for Fayt's hesitation.

"So you were watching me, hmm? Too scared to talk back now?"

Fayt wrenched his eyes away from Albel's and began to contemplate the ground. His heart was beating so fast. He had to calm down. But why did he feel this way? It was just Albel after all. It was true that he cared about him, and perhaps even loved him, but being _in love_ with him was another matter entirely. Besides, even if he did have deeper feelings for Albel, his _friend_ would never feel the same. At the very least he could try to make amends for their earlier altercation.

"Listen, Albel. About what happened earlier. If something I said made you feel so insecure about your strength that you felt the need to prove to me just how strong you are, then I'm sorry." Fayt smiled with what he thought was sincerity but Albel wasn't convinced. Fayt watched as the swordsman's grin faded into a disappointed scowl and he knew that his words had backfired. Something else had to be done because he couldn't leave Albel looking so downcast. He had to let Albel know just how much he cared.

"Cheer up Albel, all right?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Albel replied moodily, obviously caught off guard by Fayt's sudden change of heart.

"All I'm saying is I like it better when you smile," Fayt said warmly. _And_ _I want to be the one who makes you smile . . . _

"Whatever Fayt," Albel replied sounding sceptical. Shutting his eyes, Albel walked past him and through the door into the castle.

But Fayt was hardly disappointed by his reaction. Albel had actually used his name in order to address him, not maggot, fool, worm or anything else he could come up with so it was obvious that his anger had passed. His mood brightened, Fayt eagerly followed his companion into the castle.

ooooo

They said their goodbyes to the king and left, heading toward the mountain path behind the castle. At this time Fayt reached for the extra coats he had packed for when their regular clothes were no longer sufficient. Taking the first coat for himself, Fayt then offered the second to Albel, who promptly refused to take it.

"Bah, I've no need for such things. You can't fight properly if you are weighed down by too many layers of clothing. It's too restrictive. Besides, I'm used to the weather."

Fayt eyed him suspiciously, and with good reason. Albel was freezing, but he would never admit it to Fayt. Taking the coat would expose his weakness and make him seem dependent. It wasn't as if he had lied either. Fighting in a coat _was_ difficult.

_Idiot_, Fayt thought warmly. _Too proud to take something if I offer it because he can't bear to look weak_. Fayt sighed,_ I bet he doesn't even realize that I know he's freezing_._ He tries to act tough, but I know who'll have to take care of him when he gets sick_.

"Swallow your pride and don't be so stubborn Albel," Fayt said gently, letting a trace of his true feelings seep out with his words. Though he couldn't always show it, he really did care for Albel, and if anything happened to him, Fayt would be devastated. So with this in mind, he took the liberty of draping the coat over Albel's shoulders.

"But I already told you, I don't need it," Albel protested.

"Don't argue. It's for the best. Besides, what would happen if you got sick? Haven't you heard of the flu? Frostbite? Pneumonia? Medicine is pretty archaic on this planet, so I wouldn't be surprised if people die of the common cold here. What would I do if you died Albel?"

"I don't know . . . "

"Neither do I," Fayt said quietly, lost in thought for a moment before he continued. "Do this one thing for me. I don't want to live in a world without you." It was the closest he had come to confessing his need, both to himself, and the man who walked beside him.

This last part struck a chord with Albel and he promptly conceded and put on the coat. Did Fayt mean what he had said? Or was it just another ploy to make him feel so guilty that he'd do whatever Fayt asked of him. Whatever the case, Albel couldn't ignore the warmth spreading throughout his body brought on not by the coat, but Fayt's heartfelt concern.

He had often wondered whether anyone _really_ cared if he lived or died. He imagined that the king and Woltar would feel some regret but in the end they wouldn't miss him. _But Fayt . . . Would that fool really be_ _upset if I wasn't with him_? Fayt's desire bothered him, since he had never let anyone become attached to him for various reasons and insecurities, but at the same time he was mildly pleased that Fayt was thinking about him in that way.

As he considered the implications of what Fayt had just told him, Albel was momentarily distracted and completely unaware that the boy had gone on ahead without him. Looking back, Fayt called to him in a cheerful voice. "I'm just going to do a quick scout around. I'll be right back, okay?"

"Do as you please, fool. It makes no difference to me," Albel answered irritably. After all, Fayt could take care of himself. There was nothing out of the ordinary, and no cause for concern. Albel continued walking at a leisurely pace, enjoying the warm sun as it streamed down upon his face . . .

When he heard Fayt cry out from around the next bend.

"Albel!"

Fear gripped him with icy fingers, and a stab of panic pierced his heart, when he heard Fayt call his name. Albel could hear the urgency in the boy's voice and it chilled his blood more than the weather ever could. He ran as fast as his feet would carry him and his mind was racing too. Had something been stalking them? Waiting until Fayt left his side? Albel's mind ran through every possible scenario, none of them pleasant, but nothing could have prepared him for what he saw next . . .

ooooo oh no . . . . . . !

A/N: Mwahahahaha . . . ha . . . er . . . That's it people. I give you a cliffhanger. Every story needs at least one, right? And I just couldn't help myself. XD So if anyone wants to know what happens, review! I respond well to being prodded for information and if enough people care I'll give you the second part. It's already written, so it's just a matter of uploading.


	6. Elusive

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 6:** Elusive

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean

**A/N:** A big thank you to everyone! You've all been so supportive and the positive feedback reallymakes mehappy. I'd give you gold, but I don't have any, so how about the conclusion instead?

ooooo oh yeah!

As Albel rounded the corner, he drew his sword and prepared himself to meet whatever beast had attacked his young companion. Red eyes blazed with brutal vengeance, yet his heart beat with concern.

_Whatever hurt him, will meet with a swift and painful death!_

Thin lips curled into a snarl and old thoughts began to rage inside his head, comprised mainly of acceptable excuses and justifications for his behavior. _He's mine! I won't let anyone, or anything else, defeat him!_

Then the unexpected happened.

"Albel! There you are!" Fayt beamed at him and greeted the other man with a wave. "I found a hot spring!"

But Albel had been going too fast. His clumsy armored boots skidded on the snowy ground, and caused him to careen out of control without any means of stopping. His headlong flight was abruptly terminated when he collided with an unsuspecting Fayt. The force knocked the smaller man to the ground, and Albel landed on top of him awkwardly.

Momentum continued to force them even closer and without warning, their lips met. Albel's eyes widened and he would have pulled away, but he hesitated for a moment when he noticed the blissful look which was plastered on Fayt's face, and felt the warmth spreading to his own from their contact.

Albel could swear that he felt Fayt gently increasing the pressure against him in an almost imperceptible kiss which inexplicably left him wanting more, but instead of reciprocating, he denied himself that simple pleasure and hastily broke free. Embarrassed and slightly confused, Albel rose quickly to his feet and immediately wiped his mouth with apparent distaste.

Looking down at Fayt, who was still lying on the ground with a slightly bewildered look on his face, Albel ensured that his face masked the feelings which were currently churning within him. Albel was furious with himself. He had been a fool, in more ways than one.

First of all, he had overreacted in response to something he thought was a cry for help, and it was maddening to think that he would ever be that reckless just because one insignificant maggot might be in danger. Even more problematic, was the relief which had washed over him when he realized that Fayt was alright. But these were still minor when compared to what had happened on the ground.

Overreacting due to concern for the boy's safety was one thing, but to allow something to happen which teetered precariously on the edge between affection and desire was unforgivable. Those were _feelings_, after all. Foolish emotions he would never admit to, the ones he had always done without, and he would continue to ignore them for both of their sakes.

"Lousy maggot," he spat angrily. "What the hell was that about? Why did you call me?"

"I didn't think it would bother you . . . and I was excited." Fayt mumbled apologetically. Pushing his hands against the ground, Fayt raised himself into a sitting position and prepared himself for Albel's inevitable emotional backlash.

"Use that feeble brain of yours and remember this; if you _ever_ call me like that again, I will _not_ hurry to help you."

Initially, Fayt had been willing to take the blame for the sake of a quick resolution because he knew how much being right meant to Albel. However, he was not prepared to accept this new ultimatum and so he fought back.

"How was I supposed to know you were going to come running in like that? You practically trampled me!"

"I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Learn to dodge, fool! If I had been an enemy, you would be dead by now!" _Damn him! The fool needs to be more careful!_

"You weren't worried about me, were you?" Fayt asked slyly, seeing a sudden flash of concern mixed in with the angry rebuke.

"Worried?" Albel scoffed. "Banish that thought from your head, worm. I merely thought that you had found something worth fighting . . ."

_Of course . . ._ Fayt rolled his eyes and sighed. "So in other words, you thought that I had been attacked by something. Is that why you came running? You wanted to protect me?"

Albel offered no response, and chose instead to glare at him. Crimson eyes promised extreme and violent pain to the boy who had dared to say such a thing, but Fayt had seen him flinch ever so slightly. He had struck a nerve.

Fayt looked up at the glowering swordsman from his seat on the ground and met his fury with a bright smile. "I didn't know you cared Albel," he taunted. "It's kind of nice to see you coming to my rescue, and even shielding me with your own body. But what _really_ surprised me was that ki--"

Before Fayt could finish, the Crimson Scourge sliced through the air like a sword possessed, breezed past his face, and embedded itself in the ground behind him.

"Were you about to say something, worm?" Albel asked lightly, his voice laden with the joy of victory. Fayt had almost won that round, and though he hated to resort to the same old tactics, Albel couldn't argue with the results.

After being sufficiently humbled, Fayt struggled to his feet, still shaking. If Albel's aim had been off, even slightly, the result could have been much worse. _At least I know he wasn't trying to hurt me . . . I guess that counts for something . . ._

Several feet away, Albel was still watching him with interest. He'd never admit it, but the verbal sparring matches with Fayt were always entertaining and even somewhat enjoyable. So he waited expectantly, hoping that the boy would make an attempt to counter him, but it was not to be.

Fayt let the incident slide. For the moment, he ignored Albel and turned his full attention to the hot spring. There was no better place for bonding and brief rest would be well deserved. All he had to do was convince Albel to give it a try.

Without hesitation, Fayt shed his clothing. First the coat and then everything else followed until he was down to his underwear. Setting his clothes aside, Fayt turned to address Albel once again . . .

Albel had been watching Fayt sulkily through the corner of his eye and he couldn't seem to ignore the unfamiliar new sensations which caused his body to tremble slightly as he observed his young companion. He knew he should look away, that what he did was somehow wrong, but he couldn't stop.

Something about their close encounter had made him aware of carefully suppressed feelings which had recently taken up residence in the periphery of his thoughts. Ever since Fayt had returned to him, the feelings had been growing stronger, and making their presence known in a subtle, insidious fashion as they began to govern his behaviour toward the green-eyed boy.

Under the influence of his still undefined desire, Albel took in every aspect of the scene, while his mind memorized every detail of what was presented before him. Through shy eyes he admired Fayt. The boy was still young, but his slender frame belied a strength few possessed. Fayt carried himself with confidence, and it was obvious that he had no reservations about his body.

Albel's hand subconsciously rose and his fingers slowly traced along his gauntleted arm. He too was strong, but he still felt self-conscious of his old infirmity. His arm was a constant reminder of everything he hated about himself.

Feeling suddenly guilty, Albel looked away. He had no right to dissect Fayt this way, and doing so was only making him feel insecure about not only their relationship but the state of his own body. Just when they had settled into a routine, Albel's long dormant emotions rose to the surface, and complicated the matter. Part of him wanted to join Fayt and relax in his company, but he was hesitant.

"Albel, are you going to get in or not?" Fayt was calling to him.

Albel turned around to answer but his voice failed him. Actions speak louder than words and this was the case as Albel began to undress and when he was finished, only his gauntlet remained. He couldn't get it wet or it would be damaged, but if he took it off, he would have to expose another part of himself.

Fayt had never seen him without the gauntlet which covered his mutilated arm, or rather the mess of burned tissue which resembled an arm and he was worried that the boy would be repulsed by it. Would Fayt reject him because he was damaged? A failure? Would he think less of him as a man? And so he stood there, half-naked in the freezing cold, paralyzed by the unfamiliar sensations of doubt and fear.

_Gods Albel . . . What on Earth?_ Fayt could see his friend's distress and he knew something had to be done. Moving from where he stood beside the spring, Fayt walked over to Albel and reached out for his arm, instinctively knowing that it must have something to do with the other man's hesitation. His suspicions were confirmed, but in the worst possible way.

"Don't touch me!"

Albel reacted as if he had been struck and his breath quickened with anxiety, knowing that Fayt was inescapable. Familiar shields went up to protect him from feeling, and his old barriers reformed. The claw was a part of him, and without it he was left terribly exposed and vulnerable. Fayt would discover the pain of his past and in so doing learn that his heart was weak with hatred and shame.

Fayt had gotten closer to him, and he trusted the boy more than anyone else, but it wasn't enough, not yet, and perhaps not ever. He would ensure that Fayt's opinion of him never changed by any means necessary.

But Fayt's determination to help only grew fiercer as he saw the wild eyes which held within them a type of insanity. He took hold of the gauntlet, and Albel continued to fight him, attempting to withdraw the arm from Fayt's grasp, but the boy stubbornly refused to let him go. Fayt moved closer and laid a restraining hand against Albel's chest, forcing the older man to stop his struggles with the power of an unexpected touch. Albel felt bare skin brush briefly against his own when Fayt's finger's trailed across his exposed flesh and came to a stop on his gauntlet, seeking permission for something they both knew had to be done.

That momentary contact had sent a delirious shiver of pleasure throughout his body and Albel nearly surrendered to Fayt's gentle coaxing. There were no weapons able to defeat what Fayt wielded against him and he was greatly disturbed by this realization. No one else had ever succeeded in touching him with such careless freedom and he had never believed that such a thing would ever be possible. Fayt was making him feel something other than hatred and he couldn't allow that to happen.

He would have pushed the boy away, but Fayt looked at him with those gleaming eyes and smiled with his characteristic, devastating, will-crumbling kindness. In a voice that mirrored the strength of his gaze, Fayt murmured words of comfort. "It's okay Albel," he soothed. "You don't have to hide from me."

Albel nodded weakly in defeat and presented his arm for Fayt's inspection. _I failed to resist him. How utterly pathetic . . . _

Slowly, Fayt undid the clasps which bound the gauntlet in place and removed it completely. Next, he pulled the purple sleeve down, and undid the bandage wrappings which covered the arm. With painstaking delicacy, he began to unravel the mystery of Albel's sensitivity. As the bandages fell away, Albel's scarred limb was finally revealed and emerald eyes rested upon it for the first time since they had met.

"Oh Albel . . ."

Fayt's voice was terribly sad to his ears, and the cynic in him imagined he heard the disgusting tone of pity but another part of him denounced the suggestion of such a thing. It was definitely not pity, but something else. It was almost as if Fayt could feel his pain, that the sight of his tangible weakness troubled the younger man only because he knew. Somehow he knew that this was at the center of Albel's dysfunction, woven into his character, shaping his cruelty over years of unspeakable pain. This one arm was merely a gateway into the abysmal depths of Albel's hatred, one component in a complicated web of experiences which had driven him into solitude.

Fayt desperately wanted to understand everything about the older man and, if possible, find a way to ease his pain. _I _want_ to help him and do anything I can to make him happy again because it hurts to see him like this. His denial of emotions and hollow boasts protect him from letting anyone get too close to him. They keep him safe from rejection and now I suppose he thinks I'll push him away, but he's wrong! I'd never leave him alone because I . . . I love him . . . _

Fayt froze with the realization of what had just gone through his head. _I love him? How did that happen? _It was going to take further thought to understand his emotional journey from friendship to love which had apparently happened without his knowledge, but at that moment, Albel was not through with him.

"Take a good look, maggot," he growled defensively. "And don't hold anything back because I'll know if you're pretending, or hiding something. I know it's hideous, so hearing it from you changes nothing."

Albel watched Fayt closely for any indication of his feelings, for any reaction. He looked into Fayt's eyes, expecting to see disgust and horror but found only acceptance, reassurance and something new, which he couldn't identify.

"I'm sorry, Albel. I don't know what happened to you, but whatever it was, you didn't deserve it."

"You're right, fool. I deserved much worse." His voice was filled with bitter self disgust, but as always, he welcomed the relief which Fayt's acceptance brought him and the boy's inflexible support of him was surprisingly gratifying as well.

Fayt was so close to him at that moment, and Albel felt so damned comfortable in his presence that he almost lost his composure. He began to want something he had avoided for his entire life. He fought the urge to grab Fayt and hold him close. He actually _wanted_ the touch, the warmth and the comfort of another human being, and he knew that Fayt was the only one who could give it to him without making him feel like he had betrayed himself or his values.

The respect he held for the boy was growing daily and somehow, allowing Fayt to get close to him did not seem as dangerous as it once had. At last it appeared as though he had found a worthy partner, but still he held himself back. No matter what he had started to feel, it was not nearly enough to make him jeopardize his character. He imagined that he saw the same thoughts reflected in Fayt's eyes which were locked with his own but in a moment it was gone and his opportunity went with it.

"You're shivering, worm." Albel whispered softly and Fayt came back to his senses.

"Ah, it's cold. Come on Albel!" Fayt took him by his burned hand and began to lead him back toward the spring.

As they approached the edge, Fayt turned toward him, blushed, and shyly asked him to look away while he removed his undershorts. Albel grudgingly complied, although he was surprised that the boy was feeling bashful all of a sudden.

Fayt quickly eased himself into the water and shut his eyes so his companion could have the privacy to do likewise. Heat swirled around him, pervading every part of his body, forcing the previous cold to dissipate. He welcomed the warmth with relish, and his body tingled pleasantly as it began to relax. At the height of his enjoyment, Fayt almost forgot that Albel was still with him, but when his thoughts drifted back to contemplate his companion, Fayt became aware of just how happy Albel's trust had made him.

_I've seen part of you, but I want to see more._ Albel was revealing himself, slowly but surely, and Fayt believed that if he waited long enough, he would eventually learn everything there was to know about the Elicoorian. _I just have to be patient . . ._

"Open your eyes, fool . . ." Albel grumbled, believing that Fayt was purposefully neglecting him.

Fayt did as he was told and was rewarded with the sight of Albel sitting across from him. The swordsman had leaned his head against his side of the spring, hair tails dangling over the edge so they would remain dry, and most of his body had been submerged so that only his shoulders remained above the water level. _I'd feel better if he was beside me . . . _Fayt thought with longing.

It was sheltered and peaceful and the two were moved to silence, glad for the comfort which the spot offered them. Without words, they enjoyed each other's company, but eventually Fayt felt the need to broach the topic which he knew they were both thinking about.

"What happened to you, Albel? Do you mind telling me?" Fayt glanced at the other man and his gaze met a wall of resistance. "Forget it." Fayt sank deeper into the water, and when he looked sufficiently gloomy, he was granted a response.

Albel shrugged and answered him with a question. "Why do you care, worm?"

"I want to know more about you, that's all. Sometimes I forget that you had a life here before we met that was completely separate from our shared experiences. It feels like we've always been together, but I hardly know you. You've intrigued me ever since our first meeting at the training facility and even when we were enemies, I thought about you. I had never met anyone like you . . . " _I used to wonder why you were so distant, but at some point I realized that it was just your way. Will you ever change, Albel? _

"Enough. You've made your point." Albel sighed deeply in preparation.

Rising slightly from the water, Fayt leaned forward and waited patiently for Albel to continue. _I wonder if he has ever told anyone. _

"It was nine years ago. Back then I thought I was invincible . . ." Albel's eyes glazed over momentarily as if he had become lost in a memory but it didn't last long. Red eyes refocused, but they were noticeably sadder than before.

Doing the math in his head, Fayt concluded that Albel would have been fifteen at the time, only a year older than Peppita. _I would have been ten. I wonder what he was like back then. It would have been interesting to meet as children . . . but for some reason I can't imagine him as a child._

"You asked me once about the dragon knights. Do you remember, Fayt?"

The boy nodded. "I remember. I wanted to know why you didn't have a dragon like the others."

Albel chuckled sadly and his voice carried a hint of imbedded misery when he started to speak again. "My father was captain of the Dragon Brigade long before that fool Vox ever commanded it, and everyone assumed that the position would be passed on to me. All I had to do was complete one simple ceremony, the Accession of the Flame, and I would earn the right to succeed him as captain when I was old enough."

_His father?_ Fayt perked up at the mention of Albel's family. It was the first time he'd ever said anything about them.

"But I failed . . ." Albel frowned and ground his teeth in frustration. "It was a battle of wills, not a physical test, andI was too weak to pass. If I had been able to open my heart and mind to the dragon's influence then perhaps my flaws would have been forgiven and there would have been a chance for success but I couldn't do it. When you bare yourself completely, you become vulnerable. Weaknesses are exposed and others can and will take advantage of you once they know what drives you, or what can be used against you."

"So what happens if you can't do it?" Fayt asked quietly.

"The dragons turn against you and if they find you lacking, you are punished. That's when they kill you."

"Kill you? Isn't that a bit harsh?" _If he failed, how did he survive? _

"How predictable." A slight smirk appeared on Albel's face in response to Fayt's ignorance and foolish optimism. "This isn't a game, you know. When you make a mistake, you die. There are no second chances."

"Did they try to kill you?" Fayt asked abruptly, unable to contain himself. But after the words left his mouth, he worried that he had gone too far. If Albel wanted to tell him, he would take his time. There was no point in rushing him.

"Yes . . ." he whispered faintly. Shaking his head, Albel continued. "But I was spared the death I had earned. Before I could be consumed by the dragon's fire, my father leapt in front and shielded me from the blast. It wasn't enough though, and I ended up with this." Albel raised his arm from the water and his eyes passed over it guiltily.

"I hate myself because I don't deserve to live and this arm ensures that I never forget what I lost. My life was not equal to my father's. It was not an even trade."

"You're not being fair to yourself Albel . . ."

"You're in no position to lecture me, fool. You admit that you know nothing about me, so you have no right to tell me what's fair. There is only one rule in life. The strong survive and the weak are put to the sword. That's what I've always believed since it happened. My father was strong in body, but his heart was weak and driven by useless emotions. That's why he died. He sacrificed himself because he loved me. I never want to repeat his mistake."

_So that's why he won't let anyone get close to him, _Fayt thought sadly. _The one person who loved him ended up dead, so _h_e thinks love is a weakness. I can't really blame him either. It must have been hard for him. He lost everything, and he still believes that it was his fault._ Distracted by sympathy, Fayt failed to notice just how similar their experiences actually were.

Once again silence reigned between them and for the second time, Fayt fought against its control.

"We've both been altered, haven't we Albel? Your arm is a physical embodiment of the weakness you fight so hard to conquer. It betrays your pain and inexperience so you strive to keep it hidden behind cold, unyielding steel, along with anything else you think is weak. Quite a metaphor for your character, isn't it?" _I think I'm beginning to understand . . ._

"So you think you've got me figured out, eh Fayt? Well, you're not the only one who can make such sweeping generalizations about someone else's character. Shall I explain your weakness?"

"Go ahead Albel. It won't bother me."

"Good. You're a monster, Fayt. Forever unable to coexist with 'normal' humans, you've been cast out from society because they fear you. You're too powerful for your own good and the ones who would seek to use you and abuse your power, threaten your safety and happiness. The thought which hovers in the back of everyone's mind is whether or not to eliminate the Destroyer." _Did you hope to find escape here?_

"But you don't harbor those thoughts, do you?"

He couldn't lie when asked directly, so Albel shook his head. "No, I don't."

Fayt nodded calmly and smiled at him. "Then I'm glad that you've spent so much time thinking about me."

_How the hell can he even think like that?_ Albel bowed his head and watched the water as it rippled around them, thoroughly confused by Fayt's behaviour.

When Albel spoke, he had secretly been hoping for a fight, or an argument, anything to ease the building tension and prove to him that things had not changed between them. So he had struck a verbal blow directly at something he thought was Fayt's weak spot. But the result was not what he had anticipated. The tension had been dissolved, but with kindness, rather than confrontation.

Albel's disappointment was obvious to Fayt, and the younger man was able to see through his attempt to drive a wedge between them. _He only does it to protect himself . . . _

"Your words don't hurt me anymore, Albel. Everything you say has a ring of truth so I can't really disagree. The truth hurts sometimes, but if we constantly ignore the things that bother us, what kind of life are we living? You force me to confront my fears when no one else would ever dare to mention them to me. Besides, I think that it's better for things to remain out in the open, rather than being suppressed and allowed to fester over years of denial."

_He turned my own words against me . . . _"Is that why you've ceased to shield yourself from me, fool? You actually want me to see your true nature?"

"I trust you, Albel. Remember? And when you trust someone, it's easier to confide in them." _It's more than trust now,_ Fayt thought calmly, but he was still realistic about the likelihood of an actual relationship. _What exactly do I want? And what are the chances that he'll be willing to comply?_

Albel shook his head in disbelief. "You're good-natured to a fault, Fayt, and your compassion will probably be your downfall." _I didn't think anyone like him could ever exist . . . someone with the ability to trust me completely . . ._

"I'm not ashamed of that, you know."

"I know . . . and that's why . . . " _I want to protect you from those who would hurt you. _

Fayt waited for him to finish, but when it became apparent that Albel was not going to say anything more, he changed the subject. "We should get going."

"That's the first intelligent thing you've said all day, worm." Albel muttered with the usual disdain, carefully cloaking his thoughts under a veil of contempt.

As they exited the hot spring and dressed, neither one noticed the brewing storm clouds which were beginning to blanket the sky in sickly blue-grey. It wouldn't be long before the weather broke and turned its fury upon them.

ooooo

**A/N: **There you have it! I hope it was worth the wait.The next one will take longer since school is slowly killing me with an overload of work, but I'll get around to it eventually :)


	7. Pale Shelter

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 7:** Pale Shelter

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean

**A/N:** As always, thanks to everyone who has reviewed! I hope to hear from all of you in the future, because if nobody reviews, I get very, very sad (no pressure, right? XD). A big thank you also goes out to everyone who's reading this story, since I love to watch my little hit counter go higher!

On to the chapter explanation. Reading this chapter over, I realize that parts of it probably sound like a theory paper, and the only reason I can give is that I'm currently in essay writing mode. The rest is the result of sleep deprivation, stress, and a really strange bit of scribbles in a notepad that I just couldn't throw away.

ooooo

As usual, after every time they had seemed to get closer, Albel backed off. Even now he walked a safe distance away from Fayt, and the boy stayed well behind him. _He needs time to think. That's all. No sense in pressuring him, it wouldn't work anyway. _The man was a challenge, but when approached properly, Fayt knew that the reward for his patience would be great.

But Albel's behavior was the least of his worries. Slowing to a stop, Fayt raised his head and gazed up into the sky. Fluffy flakes of snow were floating leisurely around him, collecting in his hair and peppering his coat with speckles of white. The higher they climbed, the colder it had gotten and the snow was not melting as it normally would have at a lower elevation. Fayt shook himself and smiled inwardly. It was good to feel something, even if it was bitter cold. Anything was better than the chill of nonexistence. Of course there were many things which were significantly nicer than being cold, like remaining close to the one you love. With this in mind, Fayt hurried to catch up to the brooding man who was currently expending every effort to ignore him.

After several minutes had elapsed, it had started to snow harder, and with increased winds the weather was quickly becoming violent, but Albel had not shown any sign of halting their excursion for a weather delay. Despite his warm outer coat, Fayt was shivering and his teeth chattered noisily. The storm continued to rage on around them, and the cold wind was making it hard to breathe. With every inhalation, cold air filled his lungs, freezing him from the inside out, and chilling his blood as it circulated through him.

Before too long, Fayt's body had become numb with cold and he was beyond tired. Every step forward was a challenge while the wind fought against him and held him back. With little choice, he squinted his eyes against the wind and driving snow which whipped against his face. Painful sleet assaulted his tender skin, and Fayt clamped his eyes shut, effectively walking blind. When he dared to crack one eye open, just a slit actually, he was able to find Albel's familiar form not too far ahead of him in the snowy desolation.

Unlike Fayt, he was showing no signs of weakness. Albel walked with his head held high, as if the wind and sharp snow didn't bother him, even though he was also feeling it's effect. Well aware of his responsibility, Albel knew he had to remain strong. Fayt was weak, and unaccustomed to the fury of the winter storms which came and went in Airyglyph. The boy had been pampered for much of his life, so it was somewhat unfair to blame him and Albel really didn't hold it against the younger man. It just meant that he was now responsible for both of their lives, and in some ways this thought excited him.

Once again he was using his strength to prove his mastery over the younger Fayt but he couldn't stop the fear of failure from creeping into his thoughts. Tiny fists of doubt battered his calm confidence, and he became aware of the fact that his abilities might not be enough to save them both. Of course this feeling was not new to him.Albel knew he was not immune to failure, but he had worked long and hard to prove to others that he was. While most people were easily convinced, it really didn't matter since they were nothing but worthless fools in his eyes. So he could impress the ignorant. It was not something to be proud of, nor did it prove that he was everything he claimed to be.

Whatever the case, he would survive, there was no question of that, but Fayt could easily succumb to the elements. Even now the boy was not fairing well. Fayt was struggling in the deep drifts of snow, fighting against the strong winds and nearly killing himself in an effort to appear stronger than he was.

In a rare act of compassion, Albel slowed his pace and allowed his young companion to catch up, just enough so that his body would shield Fayt from the wind and snow. Next, he adjusted his stride and placed his feet carefully, brushing snow to the side as he plowed through the snowdrifts and cleared a path which would be at least a little easier for Fayt to walk through. Whether Fayt noticed these little concessions, Albel would probably never know, nor did he care. If anything, it would be better if Fayt remained unaware of the secret help his reserved companion provided him with.

Normally, Albel would never condone such a clear display of weakness, but Fayt was a special case. Had it been any of his other underlings who had been impeding their progress, he would have left them behind without a second thought. One weak link could endanger an entire unit of men, but this time it was just the two of them, and the silently trudging presence behind him was no ordinary underling, but the savior of their universe.

It was none other than Fayt Leingod, the Embodiment of Destruction himself, who was floundering at Albel's heels like a bumbling child. The same boy who had overpowered and defeated him long ago was now dependent on _his_ care and protection. Knowing that Fayt _needed_ him, and was actually _relying_ on him made Albel feel that much stronger. That feeling of superiority alone was almost reason enough to keep the boy alive and by his side, but there was something else which was driving him.

Albel actually liked knowing that Fayt was around, much to his dismay, and the blue-haired boy's familiar presence provided him with stability, which was something he had not had in a long time. In the past, he would roam aimlessly, searching for stronger and fiercer opponents. Power, strength and control; These were the things which he valued and respected in others.

He had sought an equal, or perhaps a superior, and he had found Fayt, who was potentially the most powerful entity in the universe. Albel no longer had to search for the ultimate opponent because that person willingly followed him. Fayt was his constant companion, ready to support him in all things, and he felt compelled to return the favor.

It was almost comical, at least in a sad way, that he had been searching for one who could defeat him, anyone who would prove what he secretly believed in his heart, that he was weak and undeserving of life. After he was defeated, he would be killed, and Albel had long prepared himself for that eventuality, even as he exuded confidence in his abilities. But then he had met his match in Fayt and things had become confusing again. Their bond had originally been that of predator and prey, but when Fayt defeated him, everything changed.

Though he claimed otherwise, the truth was that he owed his life to the younger man. Fayt could have killed him, and the rules of battle demanded that the boy _should_ have killed him, but Albel knew now that Fayt followed his own path, and the only rules he obeyed were spawned from his strange concepts of right and wrong which sometimes seemed to be based solely on emotion.

There was no place for mercy on the battlefield, but Fayt was merciful and he still did not suffer from any negative consequences. In retrospect, Albel had to admit that the decision had been a wise one. Perhaps someday he would ask Fayt why. What had the boy seen in him that he believed was worth saving? Fayt and the others had killed Shelby after all, so it wasn't just a matter of being averse to taking lives. Was it pity? Sympathy? Respect? Did Fayt spare him because he was strong, or weak? _He called me weak then, but I suspect he was only trying to prove a point, rather than saying how he truly felt._

Before he could become trapped in his looping thoughts of pride and doubt, Albel's attention was drawn back toward the focus of his reflection.

"Where are we going, Albel and why are we still going up instead of down? I admire your dedication to duty," Fayt mumbled sarcastically, "but this is ridiculous."

Instead of becoming angry at such blatant mockery, Albel held his tongue and proceeded to answer Fayt with utmost seriousness. "It's too late to head back now, fool. There's a cave not too far where we can ride out the storm, and it is closer than heading all the way back to town. This is nothing. It will get worse before it gets better, so it is safer to take shelter now than risk getting lost, or worse, on the way down the mountain."

_So he's not just being stubborn. I should have known better. _Fayt grew quiet again and continued to move doggedly through the snow, but even with Albel's body as a shield he was still having trouble.

A soft, yet painful moan from Fayt caused Albel to turn his head around in alarm. Fayt's eyes were closed and as he stumbled, his body fell forward and sagged against Albel's back. Numb fingers attempted to close upon the older man's garments in a feeble attempt to stay upright, but they were unwilling to do as they were told. His fingers were quickly dislodged and Fayt tumbled down face first into the snow.

"We don't have time for that, fool!" Albel admonished him angrily. To struggle was one thing, but to flat out fall was another. "Get up!" Albel commanded as he reached his hand down to drag Fayt back up onto his feet.

Fayt raised his tired head to look at Albel and the other man was shocked by the sheer misery which was now spreading across the boy's usually happy countenance. What worried him even more was seeing that the boy's lips were starting to match his hair. They had changed from the familiar soft pink to a pale blue as the blood drained from Fayt's extremities to protect the vital organs. Although he was clearly in pain, Fayt managed to shoot Albel a brief smile to thank him for his assistance and the swordsman's cold heart nearly melted with pity.

"Are you able to continue?" Albel asked suddenly, well aware that it wouldn't make a difference whether he could or not. They really didn't have a choice in the matter, but if Fayt answered his question the wrong way, it would definitely hurt his opinion of the boy.

"I haven't got a choice," was Fayt's weak reply, and it mirrored Albel's own thoughts. "But, please, don't inconvenience yourself for my sake. I don't want any special treatment. I can do this, all right?"

_And he dares to call me stubborn_, Albel thought with satisfaction and he even smiled faintly. Fayt's determination never ceased to amaze him. Fayt took care of himself, at least he tried to, and Albel couldn't help but respect that. The ones he truly hated were those who refused to try, the ones who would not do anything for themselves and the ones who relied on the benevolence of others to make their lives easier. These were the kinds of maggots he was charged with protecting and it infuriated him to no end. The whole kingdom, hell, the whole planet was filled with spineless vermin who expected everything to be given to them without ever lifting a finger. But Fayt was different.

"Stay close, worm. If you fall again in this blizzard, I won't come looking for you, understand?"

"I wouldn't expect you to Albel. Take care of yourself first. Worrying about me will only get us both killed." _Isn't that your greatest fear? That concerning yourself with someone else's welfare will put your own life in jeopardy? Or maybe it's more complicated than that . . ._

Albel nodded, as if Fayt's response had pleased him, but he was slightly bothered by the concession. If Fayt had become too weak to protest, then things were perhaps worse than he had initially believed. As the storm worsened, Albel became increasingly worried that Fayt would falter again but the boy was true to his word and managed to stay upright and proceed forward, albeit slowly.

ooooo

As he walked forward, Albel's vision was constantly obscured by a blur of white as snow was driven around them but eventually, by virtue of straining his eyes, he saw a dark spot in the blinding whiteness. It was the mouth of the cave he had been seeking and the sight couldn't have been more welcome.

"We're here, fool." Coiling a hesitant arm around Fayt's shoulders, the older man guided him toward their salvation and Fayt followed meekly, knowing that Albel's strength would get them through.

Once inside the cave, Fayt collapsed into a shivering ball of misery and exhaustion. He was so cold that it hurt. Fingers, toes, nose, ears, all of which had gone numb from the cold and were now burning with pain, but the pain was a welcome sensation because it meant that his nerves were still alive with feeling and he would not have to deal with the problem of frostbite.

While Fayt huddled against the side of the cave wall, Albel got to work and prepared to light a fire using what he could find in Fayt's travel pack. He found the boy's lighter, and then looked for something which would make suitable kindling. When nothing presented itself, he tore open the inner layer of his coat and removed some of the insulation and arranged the material in a small heap on the cave floor. After a brief, worried, glance over at Fayt, Albel confirmed that the boy was indeed still breathing, and he turned his concentration to the task at hand. The small spark from the lighter ignited the down from his coat and before long, Albel had a small flame. Once it was lit, all he needed was fuel. Without hesitation, he tossed in Fayt's travel bag. Whatever they had now, they would either use or leave, so there was no reason to keep something for transport. With nothing left to do, Albel took a seat by the fireside and proceeded to warm himself.

Roused by the flickering light of the fire against the cave wall, Fayt managed to stumble over and crouch down beside it, huddling closer in order to benefit as much as he possibly could from the warmth it gave off. But something about him seemed to displease Albel who didn't waste any time before telling Fayt exactly what was on his mind.

"Take your clothes off."

"What!" Fayt gawked at the other man, as if he couldn't believe what he had just heard. Surely Albel didn't want him to get naked. _Not that I would really mind . . ._

"They're wet! If you don't take them off, you'll get a chill and I refuse to take care of you if you get sick due to your own stupidity. Take my advice or not, it's your choice, fool."

"And what about you? How come you get to stay dressed?"

"Because _I_ wasn't foolish enough to stumble into a snowbank. Your covered in snow and it's starting to melt!"

"Fine." Fayt began to undress slowly, and as he removed them, he laid each article of clothing beside the fire where it would dry. Things continued at a good pace until he reached his underwear. The simple pair of boxer shorts were soaked and flattened to his skin and he had to admit that the sensation was extremely uncomfortable. Glancing at Albel, his eyes asked the unspeakable.

"Take them off, worm." Albel asserted sternly. "It's for your own good. You're not shy, are you? Surely you have nothing to be embarrassed about. I'm sure your father didn't hesitate to mess with some of your other genes while implanting the destruction one." The older man smirked with malicious glee at Fayt's discomfort and his eyes unknowingly burned with the desire to see just exactly what his companion was like underneath those complicated clothes.

"At any rate, we're both mature adults and believe me, it's nothing I haven't seen before."

Faty nearly pointed out just how bad that sounded but thought better of it. "Your right, Albel. It's just like the changing room in gym class, or even the showers afterwards. _Except I was never alone with anyone . . . let alone someone who makes me feel so . . . _As his thoughts continued, Fayt felt a new sensation assaulting his lower extremities and it wasn't the discomfort of wet clothing. Horrified, Fayt quickly thought of the most disgusting thing imaginable to keep his mind out of the proverbial gutter. In fact, the thought which crossed his mind at that moment defied description. It was that bad. One can only wonder, and many could guess, but the likelihood of such a thought ever being repeated by another person is slim to none.

With the crisis avoided, Fayt shook his head to clear it, but before he started to peel off his last line of defence, his hidden thoughts slipped past his brain and spilled from his mouth with a sigh. "Why can't I help feeling like I'm in some kind of bad porn movie . . . " Fayt had only been muttering absently to himself, but Albel overheard him.

"Porn? What's porn?" _Such a strange word._ It rolled off his tongue pleasantly enough, surely it wasn't a bad thing. Albel had learned about 'movies' before, but this was something new. As much as he hated to admit his ignorance, curiosity begged him to increase his knowledge about Fayt's world and language. But there was something odd about the way Fayt was blushing as he said that word so casually . . .

"Erhm, you weren't supposed to hear that. Forget I said anything." Fayt mumbled.

But Albel could not just forget something like that, especially when Fayt was trying so hard to avoid an explanation. The mere mention of that word seemed to make the boy squirm uncomfortably and Albel had to admit that it was pleasing to the eyes.

"You realize that withholding information from me is not an option. Right, worm?" Albel purred deviously as he flexed his metallic claws, causing them to glisten in the firelight.

"Aw, come on Albel, it's not that important. Really!"

Albel shook his head. "I must know what our situation has to do with this new word. What exactly is the relation?"

"Fine!" Fayt huffed. "A porn movie is-- you know what a _movie_ is, right? Moving pictures and all that?"

Albel nodded.

"And you know that some movies are funny, those are comedies. There are ones about love stories or romances, and then there are ones about, uh, lust . . . " Fayt was beginning to fidget nervously, clearly uncomfortable, which only heightened Albel's interest.

"Well . . . a porn movie is one which shows two . . . or more . . . people being ah . . . intimate with each other . . ." Fayt heaved a relieved sigh and looked at his companion to see if his rather vague description had been satisfactory.

"But isn't there intimacy in a love story as well?" Albel interjected with genuine curiosity and an undeniable justification for doing so.

"Right . . . " Fayt agree cautiously. "But this is different."

"How so?"

"They only show people having sex, Albel, all right? Then other people can watch it. Does that explanation work for you?"

"They actually make such things?" Albel asked in disbelief. What a novel concept. When Fayt nodded in confirmation, Albel's eyes glazed over as he fell into deep concentration. "How curious . . . " Albel's mind drifted slowly back to the statement which had prompted their little discussion, and was appalled by his findings. "So what the hell makes this feel like one of your 'porn' movies?"

Fayt's face turned a newly invented, and previously untested shade of red as he answered. "Well you see . . . most of the films have really bad plots, if any, involving absurd situations. They're kind of contrived, you know? So when you're sitting over there demanding I take my clothes of, it just seemed really, ah, strange that's all. Especially since we're _alone_, in a _cave_. There's no one around for miles, anything could happen and nobody would ever know. _I'm_ almost naked, and _you_ have to wander around in those damned provocative clothes which leave nothing to the imagination . . . " And at that moment, Fayt realized that he had gone too far. He braced himself for Albel's heated reply, but none came. Instead, the other man looked thoughtful and even somewhat confused.

"But Fayt, you're not a woman, and neither am I for that matter. What makes you think that anything like that would happen between us?" _Then again, I've never been attracted to women . . . and Fayt is . . . _For the second time that day, Albel's hungry eyes wandered over Fayt's form, visually devouring the younger man. _Oh gods . . ._

Unaware of Albel's train of thought, Fayt continued with his explanation. "It doesn't always have to be a man and a woman. Same sex pairings have become quite common actually. But I suppose it's different here."

Albel considered Fayt's words, and looked inward for his own feelings on the matter. Far back in the depths of his experience were the shady expectations of society. Once, Albel had both a mother and a father, a family if you will, and so deep in his psyche there was the knowledge that this was the proper way of things. Men and women married, and this resulted in children. What else would be the point?

In all honesty, Albel had never considered the possibility of having a male companion, and the thought of intimacy with another man was almost completely foreign to him. There had been some men in his own Black Brigade who had resorted to bedding each other when there was a lack of women, but for the most part it was frowned upon as a disgusting and immoral act. He too had looked at them with disgust, but he supposed now that he had been more disgusted with the idea of love and physical intimacy than who you chose to share it with.

As for Albel, he had never actually considered settling down with anyone, male or female, since he could never bring himself to trust anyone enough to make that kind of commitment. He hated himself, and so it stood to reason that everyone else hated him too. You can't love another until you first learn to love yourself and Albel had not completed this all important first step.

But perhaps the most damning reason to explain why Albel had never considered other men as objects of desire was that the dregs of society which passed for men in Airyglyph were completely unappealing, if not downright hostile. Those who didn't hate him, feared him and for the most part he considered everyone around him to be inferior. Even the king did not measure up to his standards, but that was different matter entirely. The older men were burly rustics like Vox, and the younger ones were typically useless oafs. They were all maggots in his eyes and he had never found any of them attractive.

Albel had always been the exception. There were none like him in the kingdom and perhaps that was why it had taken him so long to discover that the differences were more than skin deep. Fayt was also different. The boy was unique and desired by so many, and once his mind realized that it was a possibility, Albel's attraction grew.

His barriers had kept him from seeing it, but as Fayt continued to close the distance between them through patient devotion, Albel's heart had opened itself up to suggestions for a deeper relationship. He wasn't pleased with this new development, but he couldn't really prevent it either.

Albel decided to press things further, seeking the rejection which would quell his new emotions. "You do like women, don't you Fayt?" _There would never be a chance for me anyway . . . _

Interestingly enough, Fayt merely shrugged in a non-committal fashion and continued to look at him with the strangest expression, which Albel took to signal some form of absolute honesty. "I guess it depends on the person . . . I thought that I liked girls, but sometimes, a person's outlook on life can change when they are presented with someone new. I think that as long as you love someone, it doesn't matter if they are male or female, and once you realize how important that person is to you it gets harder and harder to imagine yourself with anyone else." Fayt smiled and held his eyes for several seconds before the boy flushed red again and quickly looked away guiltily. _I can't make it any clearer for you Albel, so please try to understand._

In that brief moment, Albel had witnessed something in Fayt's eyes which he had seen in countless others. Desire. It was faint, but unmistakable. Fayt didn't have the ability to hide his emotions, at least not well, and definitely not from someone who had been with him for as long as Albel had.

Yet this time, there was a clear difference between how Fayt looked at him, and how others had. It was gentle, kind and unselfish. It was possible that Fayt wanted him, but it went deeper than mere infatuation, and it had probably gone beyond a mere physical attraction. Woltar's words rang in his head as if trying to confirm what he already dreaded, _"Have you ever considered the possibility that Fayt loves you Albel, despite your imperfections?"_

Fayt shyly avoided his gaze and Albel almost found it charming. Almost. He was suffocating, bursting with new emotions he definitely didn't want and as he continued to watch Fayt he struggled and fought against them. _Resist him! It will never work. He's mistaken if he harbors any belief to the contrary! _But for every reason against, there was another, more powerful reason which countered it. _We've been together a long time now. Fayt has seen me at my worst but he's still here . . . he won't leave me . . . maybe I can trust him. _

Seeing that Albel was currently distracted with his own thoughts, Fayt hurried to finish what he had started earlier. He removed his undershorts, arranged them so that they were closest to the fire in the hopes that they would dry faster, and stood back. Now that he was naked, Fayt didn't know what to do with himself, and he was even less sure of what Albel would do. In his haste, Fayt had forgotten to ask the other man to look away, and he was about to pay for his oversight.

From his seat on the cave floor, Albel stared at him, and his gaze was shameless. If he could make Fayt nervous, than why shouldn't he? Crimson eyes scrolled up and down the body of the younger man, as if they were analysing an enemy, and what they saw was deemed terribly amusing by their owner. _He matches_, Albel thought without even realizing where his eyes had lingered. _I suppose blue is his natural colour . . . _The next thing Albel noticed was that Fayt was indeed well endowed. _I wonder if all Earthlings are like that . . . _Albel's eyes widened with surprise when started to feel something stirring in his own lower regions, and he immediately decided that Fayt had been tortured enough.

The Glyphian stood up, stepped out of his skirt while being careful not to accidently brush against anything which would encourage his unwanted arousal, and grabbed his coat from it's place next to the fire. He ascertained that the coat was sufficiently dry and brought both items over to where Fayt was standing awkwardly, arms crossed, apparently unsure of what to do next. He couldn't sit down because the floor was freezing, but standing wasn't the greatest option either. As Albel approached him, Fayt's eyes flicked nervously from what the other man held in his hands, to Albel's unreadable expression and back down to his own glorious nudity.

Without batting an eye, Albel held out his skirt and motioned for Fayt to take it, being careful to keep his eyes focused on the boy's upper half, instead of trailing back down as they ached to do. "Cover yourself, worm. I'm sick of looking at you," he lied.

"Are you sure?"

"We have a fire now, so it's not that cold. I'll be fine. But if you insist on refusing to clothe yourself, then I've no choice but to let you freeze to death."

_Again with the death threats. He never quits._ "All right, you win."

Fayt pulled the skirt on, tightened the sash around his waist so that it wouldn't fall, and glanced down to inspect himself. It looked horrible on him, but it was literally better than nothing. _I guess it takes skill to pull this look off._

When he looked up, Fayt noticed that Albel was still staring at him. _What does he want? _Albel was so close to him, that Fayt could feel the other man's warmth. Heat radiated against his cold, bare skin and he wondered what it would be like to touch the source. Fayt's cheeks burned as blood rushed to his face, and to his mortification, his face was not the only recipient. If he hadn't been covered, Fayt would have had some explaining to do. Even so, he still felt bad about doing such a thing in Albel's skirt.

To Albel's credit, his mind at least was focused on more important matters. While he had been greatly amused by Fayt's embarrassed blushing, he had later noticed that the colour wasn't fading, and the boy's face still looked flushed. It was healthier, and certainly preferable to the pale complexion he had displayed earlier, but Albel still felt uneasy. _He doesn't look well._

Albel dropped his coat to the ground, and with uncharacteristic gentleness, he placed his metal hand on Fayt's shoulder and held him steady as he used his flesh hand to brush blue bangs away from the boy's face. Slender fingers lingered for a few seconds, resting against the boy's skin but Albel still looked dissatisfied. Moving closer, Albel touched his lips to Fayt's forehead and held them there, pressing firmly, and Fayt nearly fainted dead away. _Is he kissing me? I didn't think he could be like this . . ._

Albel stood back, crossed his arms, and appraised him. "You're fevered," he said flatly. "Burning up to be precise. You'll need to rest before it gets any worse."

_So that gentle touch was platonic after all. He took my temperature with his lips, just like mom used to do when I was little. He's worried about me. I wonder if he even realizes it._

"Are you listening, fool? I said rest!" The kindness was gone from his demeanor, and Albel was back to doing what he did best, berating others and giving commands.

Obediently, Fayt lay down and curled up close to the warmth of the fire. Instead of moving away, Albel sat down beside him, his eyes alert with an air of protective possession, and watched with interest as Fayt's breathing subsided into the long, deep rhythm of sleep. Remembering the coat, Albel recovered it and quickly tossed it over Fayt to cover the rest of his body so he would be protected from any cold breezes that made it past the fire.

Once he was certain that the boy was truly asleep, Albel licked his lips. They tasted like Fayt, which was not as unpleasant as he had expected and his lips still burned from the touch. Whether this was due to Fayt's fever, or the forbidden desire the act had renewed, was uncertain. Albel shuddered and sighed with confusion as he turned his attention toward the sleeping youngster in an attempt to distract himself from the unwanted sensations which made his senses tingle as he relived that momentary touch.

Albel watched the boy sleep with unparalleled curiosity and soon found himself marvelling at Fayt's slumber. Fayt was so incredibly peaceful and calm, even when he was ill. A small smile graced his face and his hands were balled in contented fists, much like a sleeping child's.

_Such innocence. Not a care in the world while he sleeps . . . and I bet his thoughts are untroubled by nightmares and fears._ And yet, Albel found it hard to believe his own observations. _He looks innocent, but I think he has seen too much to remain that way. He must feel some pain, or regrets, and yet he still retains trust in others, which is something I lost long ago. Is that why I want to protect him and keep him safe from any further pain? To ensure that he won't end up like me . . ._

The desire to protect something that you value. It was a new emotion for him. Yet one question remained. Albel still didn't know just how valuable Fayt was to him. _Why am I content just to watch him sleep? What exactly does the fool mean to me? And more importantly, what do I mean to him?_

Dropping his eyes and tearing them away from his companion, Albel's gaze passed over his own body in judgement. Earlier that day, Fayt had voiced his acceptance of Albel's mangled arm and he had actually been relieved. But what about the rest of his body? _I wonder if Fayt likes what he sees . . ._ Immediately, Albel gave himself a mental rebuke. It didn't matter if Fayt appreciated his physical appearance, did it? He certainly didn't have those kinds of feelings for the boy, no matter what signals his body had been sending him. _Does he like the way I look . . . What nonsense! Perhaps I'm fevered as well . . . or delusional._

Although he claimed that he didn't care, Albel still wouldn't leave Fayt's side and that night he didn't sleep. Instead, he sat beside his blue-haired companion and watched over the boy as he slept. Fayt was sick, obviously vulnerable, and something deep inside him begged the swordsman not to leave, so he didn't. Of course, if he had been asked later, he would have denied ever doing such a thing, but at the moment there were no people around to see him, and no one who would judge him for showing the tiniest shred of kindness and concern toward his, as yet unknown heart's desire.

ooooo

**A/N:** -rubs eyes sleepily- I should update earlier in the day, but I figured that if I didn't force myself to do this now, it probably wouldn't get done since I am easily distracted when the sun is shining:). Leave a review if you are so inclined, and be nice, I'm tired. Next chapter: Kiss the Demons Out of My Dreams. Is that a big enough hint for what's gonna happen? XD


	8. Kiss the Demons Out of My Dreams

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 8:** Kiss the Demons Out of My Dreams

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean

**A/N:** While I would like to claim the genius behind this title, I'm afraid that the credit must go to Green Day. It's a line from the song "Give Me Novacaine", and it just fit so perfectly I had to use it.

This chapter took a lot longer than I had anticipated, but that was mostly due to an increase in school work which I will blame for my lengthy hiatus. Final exams are creeping closer, and I should be spending my time studying, but I just had this terrible urge to post something.

ooooo

When they returned to Airyglyph, Albel led a bedraggled Fayt back to the inn. The boy was exhausted and for once Albel could not blame him. They had been caught in the mountains longer than either of them had anticipated and they were lucky to have made it back at all. They were still alive, so Albel would not be dismayed by a little fatigue, but Fayt on the other hand had been fevered and the last couple of days had been especially hard on him. Despite his condition, Fayt didn't complain, which is why Albel actually took pity on him. Anyone could see that Fayt was in bad shape. He stumbled as he walked, often leaning heavily on Albel's shoulder for support, but he wouldn't give up or concede to his weakness.

"Come along, fool. It's not far now," Albel murmured quietly.

There was only one possible explanation for Albel's uncharacteristic kindness. He was worried. Fayt had been growing weaker, and his body was failing him more often as it ran low on resources. Neither of them had eaten since the day they left, and Albel knew that the boy was surely weak with hunger on top of everything else. Huger was something he had gotten used to, and Albel's body could function properly on a minimal amount of food. In battle, there were not always enough rations, nor did wars have intermissions for opposing sides to take a lunch break.

"Thank you, Albel," Fayt mumbled. "But why are we going to the inn? What's wrong with the castle?"

"Are you saying that you don't trust my judgement?"

"Aw, Albel, you know it's not like that."

"Hmph. We're going to the inn because at the castle they will most likely want an immediate report and right now, we need rest. Also, the rooms at the inn are smaller, and significantly warmer that the castle. It will be more comfortable that way. Satisfied?"

Fayt nodded sleepily. "Makes . . . sense . . ."

Guiding Fayt through the inn door, Albel approached the counter.

"Lord Albel! What are you . . . er . . . how may I help you?" stammered the young girl at the desk.

She was probably close to Fayt's age, and devastatingly cute, with shoulder length black hair lying in two braids on either side of her head, framing a pale face. Apparently she had been sleeping, or otherwise preoccupied, because as she spoke, her hands were busy rubbing a pair of light blue eyes. Though it was always possible that this could have been due to the disbelief she experienced when confronted with the unexpected visitors.

"We need a room," he said with all the authority expected of the Black Brigade captain.

"Yes Sir, right this way!" The girl quipped cheerily as she led them down the inn hallway. "You'll have our best room, no charge of course."

"Of course . . ." Albel replied absently, with only a trace of his usual annoyance.

"There haven't been many travellers lately due to the weather, so you will have the whole place to yourselves. Now that I think about it, would you prefer separate rooms? We have more than enough space."

"One room will be sufficient." Normally, Albel would have ordered the wench to be quiet and stop her inane chatter long ago, but at the moment he was just too tired to care. It was taking all his strength just to walk and support Fayt which left little energy for witty remarks.

"As you wish . . ." the look on the young maid's face was suspicious as her eyes drifted first to Albel, and then to the weakened boy who accompanied him. "Will that be _one_ bed, or two, Sir?" she asked cautiously.

_That_ caught his attention. "What exactly are you implying, girl?"

"N-nothing. It's just that, well there have been rumours you know . . ."

"I don't know," he said curtly. "Would you be so kind as to inform me before I am forced to beat them out of you? I assume you've heard of the castle inquisitor, correct?"

The girl gulped and nodded.

"If you insist on remaining silent, the things I'll do to you will make that wretch look like a sniveling child in comparison."

Terror splashed over the innkeeper's features and a shiver of panic ran through her body from head to toe.

"I ah . . . " she choked back a frightened sob and proceeded to blubber out a response. "People have been saying, not me of course, I keep to myself, but some of our guests seem to think that you and Master Fayt are . . . " she hesitated, and dropped her eyes to the floor.

"Spit it out, woman! You're trying my patience. What lies have people been telling you?"

The innkeeper raised her head and glared furiously at him. "See how you act toward a lady!" All the innocence had vanished and Albel was staring not at a youngster, but a fearlessly irate young woman. "No wonder no self-respecting woman will have you! Damned abusive, that's what you are! And poor Master Fayt, you've probably frightened, or intimidated him into something he wouldn't do! He's much too kind to ever bother with a wicked man such as you!"

"Be quiet!" Pain surfaced when she had leveled that accusation, and Albel was conveniently distracted, at least it was convenient for the young innkeeper who continued to attack him, and each successive blow bruised his heart in a way he hadn't thought possible.

Mercilessly, the girl continued. Albel's protest had only spurred her on, and increased her confidence. If what she had said warranted such a reaction from the usually stoic warrior, then there was probably some merit in it.

"They say you two are lovers. Not lovers actually, more like you enjoy his company and he doesn't have a choice in the matter. He's probably too scared to leave you. I wonder how many times you've threatened to kill him." The inn maid glanced deliberately at Fayt, who was still muddled with fever, and frowned. It was obvious that the boy was not quite aware of what was happening.

He could hear the angry voices of Albel and the innkeeper, but their words slurred together and were almost completely incoherent. In his current state, Fayt could do nothing more than cling to Albel in order to stay on his feet, which caused the young girl to jump to conclusions.

"Do you beat him too?" She asked sharply. "Is it easier to make him comply then? Or perhaps you've drugged him. That would make the most sense I suppose. Then he can't resist you, hmm? To bring the poor boy here in the middle of the night when he is clearly unwell so you can take advantage of him. It's horrible! I shouldn't say anything, and I suppose your business is your own, but I think that liberties our fool of a king grants you are much too lenient."

"Silence!" It was all he could think of to counter her crippling attacks on his character.

Albel had spent years developing a thick skin to the never-ending rumours and murmurs of the citizens which involved him, so nothing ever bothered him to any great extent. In fact, he took twisted delight in giving the wretches something to talk about. The more he killed, the more they feared him, and the fools felt it was necessary to try and explain his behaviour, which led to the circulation of various stories.

His appearance didn't help matters either. The clawed gauntlet was especially frightening and the interest people had in it, and its origin, was great. No one knew the truth about him, except for Woltar, the king, and now Fayt. He had kept that secret carefully guarded so that the knowledge of his weakness would never fall into the wrong hands.

His crimson eyes were even more terrifying to the fools, who cowered under his gaze which seemed to glow with bloodlust and reflect nothing but joy when confronted with the deaths and misery of others. Monster, wicked, cruel, sick, twisted, all of these and more had been used to describe him, and Albel had gotten used to it long ago. He was nothing more than a demon incarnate to them, invincible, and untouchable. He had no weaknesses that the people were aware of, so nothing they said could ever affect him. But for someone to question his relationship to Fayt in such a way was unbearable, and it took all his power to exert some self restraint.

"Taking advantage of another human being like that is disgusting! Not to mention unnatural! Then again, everyone knows that you're unpredictable. Mentally unbalanced, they say. But you're stronger than I, so I can't stop you. Find your own room," the girl finished angrily.

Turning on her heel, the young innkeeper started to walk back toward the lobby, when a blow from Albel's gauntlet arm trapped her against the nearest wall. With practiced delicacy, he stroked her cheek with a metal forefinger and pressed closer until his face was all she could see.

"Tell me, little girl, why would you _ever_ attempt to lecture _me_ on what's right and wrong? You cannot reform the wicked. It is useless to try." The words came straight from his blackened heart, and clearly expressed Albel's honest belief that he could not be saved. Not from death, not from damnation, and definitely not from himself.

When no answer came, and the girl merely trembled with renewed fear, Albel pulled his arm back, intending to strike the wench who had dared to accuse him of such a thing. He wouldn't kill her, or even hurt her that badly, he just wanted to frighten her enough so that she would rethink ever speaking so candidly again, but a slight movement at his side made him hesitate. Fayt pushed himself off of Albel's shoulder, managing to stand upright, and he turned to face the trembling innkeeper who had slid down the wall, and was currently sitting on the floor.

Fayt had been able to grasp bits and pieces of their debate, and the things he had understood sickened him. It had taken him much too long to gather the strength necessary to bring an end to it. "You're wrong, you know," Fayt said calmly, his voice filled with quiet anger, "and if he had hurt you, it almost would have been justified."

_He's defending me?_ "Stay out of this, fool! It's none of your concern!"

"You're not helping things either, Albel." Fayt replied dryly, pointing out the obvious.

"I don't need you to defend me, maggot!"

"I'm too tired to argue with you Albel, so just drop the act, all right? Please . . ." Fayt raised a hand to massage his aching head. The pain had worsened considerably, and all he wanted was to find a bed and go to sleep.

"Fool," Albel muttered irritably, but his protests ceased.

"M-Master Fayt?" the girl whimpered softly, uncertain as to what was going on. _They bicker like a married couple . . . Not a trace of hatred, or distrust . . . Was I wrong?_

Fayt crouched down until he was eye level with the young woman, and did what he could to calm her frazzled nerves. "Your name is Jestrey, isn't it?" he asked kindly.

"How did you know?" She whispered shakily, eyes glued to Albel, who was still glaring at her with subdued rage.

"I remember you." Fayt replied, and her eyes settled on his once again. "We've stayed here before, but the group was larger then. You were always very kind." Fayt had easily switched from disappointment to praise, but it would take some more work before the girl came back to her senses.

Face to face, calm green eyes sought to comfort panicked icy blue ones, while radiating the type of gentle kindness only Fayt was capable of producing. "It's alright," he crooned. "Be still."

Like a wounded animal accepting treatment, the young girl relaxed, and surrendered thoroughly to Fayt's concern. When he smiled at her, she positively glowed under his attentive care, and Albel couldn't help feeling somewhat envious. _Would he do that for me? Bah, not likely . . ._

"My apologies, Master Fayt. I shouldn't have said such things." She glanced up at him shyly and blinked back tears. The apology was aimed directly at him, not Albel, and if Fayt noticed this mistake, he chose to keep the knowledge to himself.

"Will you show us the room now?" he said finally, easing them all away from the earlier tension which had practically begged for a violent resolution.

"Ah, right! Um, follow me." She made a few unsuccessful attempts to regain her footing, but fear had turned her muscles to jelly, and the girl was having a difficult time standing up.

Seeing her distress, Fayt reached toward her and helped the innkeeper to her feet. As she came closer to him, Jestrey noticed the pallor of Fayt's face. No longer burning red with fever, he was pale, and slightly cold to the touch. "Are you really sick?" she asked, voice quivering with fearful worry. How could anyone not be worried about the striking young man who cared so deeply for the welfare of others, even when he was struggling with his own problems? In a whispered voice, she added, "did he do this you?"

"No. In fact, if it wasn't for him, I'd probably be dead right now." _Of course, if I wasn't with him, I wouldn't have gotten into this situation in the first place . . ._

Fayt smiled weakly in an attempt to show that he was fine, but his body would not conform. Eyelids became heavy with exhaustion, and closed softly on dazed green eyes. _I shouldn't have exerted myself. Damn._ Without intending to, Fayt tottered to the side as his eyes shut completely. He caught himself before he fell, but his legs still wobbled, threatening to buckle at any moment.

Albel moved swiftly to support him, but the little innkeeper was closer, and it was her arm which reached around Fayt's waist while she rested a steadying hand on his chest. She felt his arm fall gently around her neck, and the trust he displayed brought a smile to her face. He would accept her aid, perhaps even welcoming it, while Albel was left alone with nothing to do but stare miserably at his loss, feeling emptier than ever before. Without Fayt at his side, he felt incomplete. Forever defined by what he didn't have.

Albel followed behind the younger pair as they walked on in relative solitude toward the promised bedroom. After taking a few steps forward, Fayt mumbled something to excuse his companion's actions.

"I apologize for Albel's behaviour," he said quietly, careful to keep his voice low and secretive. "Please forgive him."

When he said the Captain's name, Jestrey noticed the slightest colour return to Fayt's cheeks, and the faint smile which lingered afterwards was more than enough proof that something deeper than an abusive relationship existed between them. Without warning, Jestrey's own worried glare softened with knowledge.

"You're in love with him, aren't you?"

"What? I ah . . . Is it that obvious?"

The girl nodded and smiled kindly at him. "I think it's darling, actually. As long as he doesn't hurt you, that is. Does he feel the same?"

Fayt's body tensed and he shook his head. "I don't think so, and I doubt he ever will."

Glancing back over her shoulder at the swordsman who followed them, she noticed that Albel was glaring, not at her, but at Fayt, and scowling. _I wonder . . ._ In order to test the theory which was currently floating around in her head, Jestrey let her hand slip down from Fayt's waist to his rear, and watched Albel for any reaction out the side of her eye. She caught a minute change in the swordsman's demeanor, noting the crazed look which entered his eyes for a moment as her action registered with his brain, and it only deepened when Fayt did nothing to discourage her blatant groping. _Is that jealousy? I bet he'd never admit to it though._

"He's watching you like a hawk, Master Fayt." She murmured into the boy's ear in a way which looked much like a lover whispering a secret as she nuzzled his soft blue hair happily.

"Oh?" Fayt stupidly turned his head to stare at the other man, and the crazed look in Albel's eyes was upgraded to intent to kill. Fayt beamed a tired, reassuring smile at his watcher, and he was happy to see Albel relax and drop his eyes to study the intricate hardwood floor. Fayt would have liked to see more, but they had come to the end of the hallway and were currently standing in front of a very ornate door.

"We usually reserve this room for people of importance, so I guess you two qualify," the girl announced before lowering her voice to address Fayt alone. "I wish you luck, Master Fayt. You may have what it takes to tame the Wicked One. I'll pray for your happiness, although it's a shame. There are many women who would have given everything to call you their own." Jes shook her head and chuckled quietly. "Though I fear that you'll have your work cut out for you."

Jestrey cautiously placed Fayt back into Albel's care, before reaching into her apron for the room key. After fumbling with a large ring of keys for a few seconds, she found the correct one and opened the door. Before they could enter, she turned to address the Black Brigade captain.

"I'm sorry for my actions, Sir Albel. I spoke to soon, and if anything I said angered you, I beg you to forgive my ignorance. Please make yourselves at home, and if I can help in any way, do not hesitate to call. I'll be waiting."

Albel brushed by her, walked through the door with no recognition other than a contemptuous snort, and dragged Fayt with him. "Maggot," he cursed under his breath.

"You know it would be easier to carry him over the threshold," the girl taunted quietly as Albel passed and she stifled a giggle. The comment caught him off guard and Albel was momentarily unable to react. By the time he regained his senses and turned to reply, Jestrey was already halfway down the hall and well beyond his reach.

ooooo

The room was warm, just as he had predicted. Seeing the beds, Fayt had immediately collapsed on the nearest one, but Albel knew that it wouldn't be good enough. The soft glow from the fireplace provided all the light he needed for what had to be done. Staying in the same clothes as he slept was just inviting trouble, so Albel set to work, dutifully removing layers of clothing. He took the boy's coat off and cast it aside before he sized up the rest, somewhat uncertain of just what needed to come off. Deciding that the sweat drenched vest and shirt were problematic, Albel took care of them first. Next, he undid the leg armor which Fayt insisted on wearing everywhere they went. Throughout it all, Fayt allowed everything without a struggle, instinctively aware that Albel was only trying to help him.

With the clothing dealt with, Fayt was clad quite sparsely in his usual deep blue pants, and that was one piece of the boy's attire that Albel did not want to tackle, especially not after the conversation with that meddling innkeeper. _There's no way I'm stripping his pants off. He'll just have to suffer. _Albel was amazed at how strange everything seemed as he tucked the blankets around the younger man. He would never have done this for anyone else, and it bothered him to think that he was doing it now.

Fayt had quickly fallen into a deep sleep, and Albel was eager to seek his own bed, but not without taking the usual precautions. First, he set down his katana, leaning it against the headboard of his bed which would allow for easy access. Next, he carefully removed his gauntlet, scowling as he did so at the dull pain which greeted him when his arm was exposed. The cold of the mountain had aggravated his old injury and there was no escaping the throbbing discomfort, and no remedy for his affliction. Had they gone to the castle, he would have had access to some type of cream, or balm which would have dulled the pain somewhat, but at the moment he could do nothing.

After setting his gauntlet down on a convenient nightstand, Albel crawled into his bed, and pulled the covers up around his chest. For once, he was happy just to have a chance to shut his tired eyes and forget about his troubles. If he was lucky, exhaustion would keep the nightmares at bay.

ooooo

When the nightmare came, everything was familiar to him. Darkness swirled around him as he stood in the cavern which he could never wipe from his memories. He was completely alone. Desperately alone. Breaking out in a cold sweat, he swivelled his head and looked nervously around with panicked eyes. The anticipation was killing him.

As Albel turned around, he saw the silhouettes of the monstrous dragons. Not truly monstrous, perhaps, but frightening nonetheless. Dark green eyes, nearly black with disapproval burned fiercely in the darkness and he was unwittingly drawn into their gaze. It was just like when he was a child, except something was different. Tearing his eyes away from the accusatory glare of the beasts, Albel examined his body which was no longer that of a fifteen year old boy. He faced the dragons now as a grown man, not as the overconfident youngster. Yet even with the strength of an adult at his command, he trembled with fear.

_I'm still not strong enough . . . _As his doubt formed, so too did walls of fire which sprang up to surround him, trapping him, and sealing his fate. When the deathblow came, he would not be able to avoid it. _I can never escape . . ._

"Albel Nox," a voice boomed from deep in the wall of darkness beyond the spires of flames. "You have failed to open your heart and embrace us fully. You shall be punished for your folly. You sought to unite with one of us, but unsubstantiated pride and arrogance have clouded your sensibilities. We are not here to be tamed, nor will a heart as weak as yours ever hope to command one of us. The bond between man and dragon is _not_ that of master and servant. It is one of equal partners, and until you learn to share your heart and true self with another, you will be doomed to lead a pitiful, hollow existence. It is a shame that you will not experience it. Those who fail do not leave this cave alive."

A flood of images passed through his head, and Albel tensed accordingly. Memories. He knew what was coming, he had known ever since the first night the dreams had come to plague him, and every night thereafter, with little change.

_The searing pain as flesh melted from his body, and the tortured screams of his father. Watching helplessly as clothing and flesh liquified and fused with bone in the supernatural heat from the dragon's fire, reducing his father, the man who had smiled at him, the only person who loved him, to a fleshy abomination. The smell of burning flesh assaulted his senses, and the image, as always, was made even more poignant by his accompanying childlike screams of defiance. Albel's last memory of his father was the image of a smouldering heap on the ground while he watched on in horror as it blackened and shriveled until there was nothing left but a pile of ashes at his feet. _

_"We will accept your father's life in place of yours, but his sacrifice will never be forgotten. The sentient dream, it is the curse of reliving the events of the past. This alone will be your constant companion. You have been granted a second chance, boy. Make the best of it, and perhaps one day, when you have learned to trust in another, the curse will be broken."_

_That time had not yet come._

"Accept your death with grace, child," the dragon's roar thundered throughout the cave and the echo reverberated against the walls, making Albel's innards churn with finality. As the pillar of flame sped toward him, Albel closed his eyes and braced himself for the blow; there was no point in fighting it. He had not seen his father. There would be no salvation this time, and no intervention which would spare his pathetic life.

"Albel!"

_That voice . . ._ Albel raised his head and searched the darkened cavern for the source. It was not his father, but it was familiar to him. _It doesn't belong here . . . _

Fayt ran out of the darkness to stand beside him.

"What are you doing here, maggot?" He growled suspiciously, still clueless and uncertain of why Fayt would have intruded upon his private battle. _Deception._ "What do you want?" Instinctively, his hand fell to his blade but Fayt only smiled warmly in response to his action.

"You didn't think I'd let you face them alone, did you? I'm here because you need me, whether you'll admit it or not. Besides, you don't need a dragon to rely on. You have me. I'll protect you, even when you've lost hope. It would also be beneficial if you didn't hurt me. That means no swords," he finished sulkily.

Albel rolled his eyes when he saw that the boy was pouting, and obediently released his grip on the hilt of his sword. "Is that supposed to make me feel better? You're nothing more than a nuisance," Albel snorted.

"I'm obviously more than a nuisance to you, Albel, or can't you recognize your own feelings?" Fayt grinned cryptically at him, waiting for a response which would no doubt be accompanied by some threat of bodily harm. He was not disappointed.

"What nonsense are you spouting now, fool? Remind me to carve that meddling tongue from your mouth when this is over."

"Are you sure about that Albel? I think my tongue could be very useful to you." Fayt winked at him slyly, "if you get my drift."

"Wretch," he spat.

"Coward," Fayt countered.

"What?" Albel blurted, as he choked on his shock. The Fayt he was used to would never dare to say that. The Fayt he knew _valued_ his life. Just what exactly had his mind spawned to harass him?

"You still refuse to acknowledge me? I'm your heart's desire, Albel, the one who will protect you from your demons. I'll bring light into your heart and rid it of the darkness which inhabits you now, but first you have to trust me."

As the flame neared them, the lead dragon spoke again, addressing the newcomer who had arrived to aid the doomed. "Foolish boy! You shall perish alongside the one with whom you align yourself. Leave now and your life will be spared. Forsake the lost one; he will never bend to your will."

Fayt smirked. "No."

His body was alight with the symbols of Destruction, casting an eerie glow over both Albel and himself. His arm outstretched, Fayt met the beast's flame with his own powerful beam which emanated from the palm of his hand in a concentrated shaft of light. The controlled energy widened, causing the fire to split into two streams as it made contact with Fayt's purifying white light.

_Perhaps it is not too late for the Nox boy, if he has allied himself with one such as this . . . _The dragon thought as its body combusted, leaving no trace behind.

When it was over, Fayt turned toward Albel and confronted him. "You did _not_ deserve death. You needed to live so that we would have the chance to meet." As Fayt spoke, the light which shone from his body grew even more intense and enveloped the swordsman at his side. As the light closed in around Albel, so too did a pair of thin, yet strong arms. They wrapped around his waist and pulled him closer, a clear violation of his personal space, but Albel made no effort to stop what was happening. Drawing the swordsman completely into his luminescence, Fayt whispered something in his ear, and Albel had to strain himself to hear it.

"I love you, Albel, and I will be your salvation, but only if you let me."

_Love? Impossible . . . _

Fayt leaned closer and kissed him softly, and the action sent unexpected shivers of desire throughout the swordsman's body. The light of destruction flowed over and around their bodies, dancing with heated passion that Albel couldn't resist. A strong hand reached behind Fayt, caressing the back of his neck gently before Albel the Wicked sifted slender fingers through his hair and entwined them in the boy's azure locks. He held Fayt in place and boldly returned the soft kiss roughly, sucking on the youth's lips, seeking sustenance for his starving heart.

It was only a dream after all. The events which occurred in his dreams would stay there, and this meant that he had free reign to do the things he would never allow himself in real life. In the realm of dreams, there were no consequences for his actions, and Albel could show his affection, if it was affection, without fear. So he drew the boy closer in a warm embrace, seeking the contact which he had denied himself for years, and in that moment, he felt complete. Happiness which he had never though possible became acquainted with his heart and mind for the first time in twenty-four years.

With his reciprocating touch, the curtain of light lifted, and Fayt carefully pried himself away from his beloved's touch. Glowing red eyes were drawn to the source of his pleasure, and they were met by a pair of smiling green ones, watching him happily from behind bright, blue bangs.

"Face it, Albel. You can't deny how you feel, and you must feel _something_, or else I wouldn't be here." Even in his dreams, Fayt was damned annoying and had the wonderful talent of stating the obvious.

_My heart's desire . . ._ Albel thought warily, considering the likelihood of such a thing as he stroked Fayt's hair absently. _He's strong enough to survive anything. I don't have to worry about him. _While together with Fayt, Albel had dropped his guard, believing that the crisis of the dragons had passed. So when the boy was ripped from his arms, he was too stunned to react.

"Albel!" Fayt cried, terror plain in his voice, as a new beast dragged him away and upwards into the expansive darkness which comprised the cavern's ceiling.

"What the hell? Fayt!" Albel called out, but there was no answer.

For too long, a deathly silence filled the cave, and Albel was kept company by the sound of his anxious breathing. Several heartbeats later, Fayt's screams replaced the previous silence, and Albel was dumbstruck by his inability to do anything which would stop that horrible noise. It was the voice of all his deepest fears, and it filled him with helpless agony.

Drops of moisture fell from above and began to accumulate on his face and body. Curious, Albel wiped some of the unknown substance from his cheek and inspected it. The colour matched his eyes. It was raining blood. For years, Albel had painted numerous battlefields red with the blood of others, slaughtering his enemies with reckless abandon until the rivers were stained red with the blood of the fallen. It had always pleased him to see the fruits of his labour displayed in such a way, but now the sensations he felt were entirely new. It disgusted him. Covered in Fayt's blood he felt nothing more than revulsion, and his stomach threatened to loosen at the mere thought of where the current downpour had come from.

In the end, he never saw what happened, only the result. Fayt spiraled down from above and landed hard on the ground, several feet away from where he stood. Cautiously, Albel made his way toward Fayt's motionless body. He walked slowly, though whether this was due to the fear of what he would find, or because of the lingering, stubborn refusal to show the concern which would betray his true feelings once and for all was uncertain. When Albel finally reached the younger man, the colour drained from his face at the sight of him.

The boy's broken body was twisted unnaturally. He had been eviscerated with surgical precision, and his pale, and delicate white flesh was grotesquely carved and bleeding. Fayt tried to move, but couldn't, and he moaned faintly before his throat filled with blood and he coughed violently to clear it. Afterwards, his eyes shut briefly following his efforts as if that small act had exhausted him. Noticing Albel, the Fayt's eyes lit up momentarily, but pain brought him back to his senses and all signs happiness faded from him completely.

_Fayt . . . _Why did it suddenly feel as if someone had taken hold of his heart and squeezed?

"A-Albe . . ." His voice was nothing more than a pathetic, hoarse, whisper. No matter how hard Fayt tried, struggling desperately to speak as his life left him, he couldn't finish.

The older man knelt down, and with gentle grace Albel knew he wasn't capable of, he lifted Fayt's crumpled body off of the ground. Cradling him with trembling arms, Albel pressed their bodies together in a vain attempt to keep the other from his fate, but he knew his blue-haired companion wouldn't last much longer. Fayt's multiple wounds were gushing blood, and the streaming liquid ran through Albel's fingers like the sand of an hourglass, signaling that the boy's time was running out. There was nothing he could do to prevent it.

The Wicked One tightened his grip on Fayt, and held him close as the boy died in his arms. Fayt's weakened body convulsed in the throes of death, and with a final gasp, the boy went limp and sagged against him. After that, he didn't move again. Albel touched his shaking, bloodstained hand to Fayt's cheek and peered into the boy's face. Those familiar bright green eyes had become dark and although they were opened wide, they stared without focus. That blank stare was horrible, empty, and lifeless. The spark, the light which made them Fayt's eyes, was gone. Fayt was gone, and it drove him mad with anguish.

Albel's body shook as a strangled cry grew in his throat, but he couldn't utter a sound. He turned the pain inward, and it was forced to find a new method of escape. Tears of empty longing squeezed past dark, emotionless eyes as Albel shed the tears he never could in real life. _I cry . . . for that . . . worm?_

The heavy falls of footsteps behind him cut through his mourning and Albel's head swung around to see who would be foolish enough to interrupt him. Moist crimson eyes rested upon the tall warrior who strode purposefully toward him, and widened with panicked recognition. _Not now. Anyone but him . . . I can't let him see me like this._

"What's this? Albel the Wicked is actually weeping over the corpse of a loved one? You never shed tears for me though, did you?"

"Father?" Albel choked finally, frozen in disbelief of the man's words. _It's not supposed to be like this._

"You do not deserve such things, little Albel," the man frowned at him. "He will only die painfully because of your incompetence. The child was a fool and loved you. It was only a matter of time before he died for his mistake. You should have saved him the trouble and kept him at a distance."

_I know that . . . I tried to, but he wouldn't allow it. Damn him . . . the fool._

"But if you have started to feel something for this boy, then you have sealed your fate as well as his."

_Do I feel for him? I . . . _

The man snorted and shook his head dismally. "Didn't you learn your lesson? He'll die because of you. You'll kill him, just like you killed me. Is that what you want, son? To watch as another dies for you, right before your eyes? Ah, but then again, death doesn't bother you, does it? Aren't you supposed to be heartless? How many have you killed who left loved ones behind, families torn apart, children orphaned and abandoned all because of you? It's only fitting that you are punished for the pain you've caused countless others. You've become a monster, boy. How disappointing."

_A disappointment? Of course . . ._

Albel was sinking deeper into nightmarish despair, but thankfully, something was beckoning him from the world outside, and it forced wakefulness upon him. He had been saved once again, and Albel would soon learn that he had Fayt to thank for this new distraction.

ooooo

A/N: I feel bad about not including any more cave stuff, but I just had a bad case of writer's block and so I decided that it would be simpler to just move on. I had some things planned, but for some reason, I didn't feel like fleshing them out, although I might go back and change things later. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this one! Next time, Albel gets up close and personal with Fayt, and then with himself XD. Reviews, as always, are appreciated, and they'll motivate me to get the next chapter up that much sooner


	9. Sleepy Confessions

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 9:** Sleepy Confessions

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean.

**Warning:** A little lime for those who want it. Nothing too graphic though since I'm still not used to writing the smexy bits yet. Hopefully I'll have improved before this story gets into the good stuff . . . Not that I'm making any plot promises or anything . . . XD -clamps hand over mouth while mumbling spoilers-

"Mmphfa!" :D

**A/N:** Two exams down! Ah, and since I've got a little spare time before the next one, I decided to do a little typing . Thanks again to everybody who reviewed last time. I'm glad everyone is so positive, even though I'm slowly killing Albel with emotional torture. I can't help it really. I'm quite sadistic. Will the warm fuzzies be back? Yes, soon, and with a vengeance. XD

ooooo

Fayt sat quietly at the bedside of the one whom many had dubbed "wicked," and sought to find any trace or reason for such a label in the sleeping man's troubled countenance. There were many definitions for the word, yet he knew that there was more to the Wicked One than met the eye. How much was excluded from that title? It was just another defense, something which would protect the embittered Albel Nox from coming to terms with himself.

He kept a silent vigil, ignoring his own body's complaints which begged for rest and recovery, and he watched on as Albel's weaknesses were revealed before his patient eyes. Fayt had been roused from his long awaited rest to sounds of distress coming from his companion who should have been sleeping soundly, but the older man had been caught in the throes of what must have been a frightening nightmare.

"FAYT!" As he screamed the name, Albel's body went rigid and his breathing stopped for several heartbeats. Fayt, who had been sitting comfortably on the bed also held his breath from shock, and his hands clutched at the bed sheets. If it had just been a regular cry, he wouldn't have been as agitated, but it had been _his_ name which Albel had called out in a voice filled with terror, with undertones of pain.

"What is it now, Albel?" He whispered sadly to the darkness, asking a question no one could answer for him. Fayt knew part of the swordsman's dark and sketchy past, but this new development caught him off guard. It obviously had nothing to do with what happened when Albel was young. _He's afraid of something . . . but what does it have to do with me? _

After that frightening declaration, nothing would tear Fayt away from the one he had chosen to love. Perhaps "chosen" was not the best word to describe his change in attitude toward the harsh swordsman. He had been compelled to love him. Something about Albel had intrigued him from the beginning. The man excited him like no other, and yet underneath the clever exterior of strength and heartless cruelty, he had seen the pain and loneliness which were always present in those who claimed that they had no desire to associate with anyone else. It was usually the result of some deep trauma, or instance where they had been hurt, and the fear of repeating such an event urged them to keep others a safe distance away. Those who chose to be alone and assured anyone who cared enough to ask why, that they preferred it, were really the ones who needed companionship the most. They craved it, but due to immense willpower driven by fear, those feelings of need were carefully and adequately suppressed. It was only in moments such as this, in the defenseless state of sleep where no amount of physical skill or strength could possibly protect them, that the truly weak at heart were exposed and vulnerable to the things they refused to acknowledge during the day. Yet when they wake from the horrors of their dreams, nothing changes. If anything, the need for seclusion grows greater.

There was no way, at least at the moment, for him to ease the other man's pain. He would have loved to crawl under the covers and press against Albel's shaking body to calm it and control the tremors with his touch. _You don't always have to fight your battles alone, Albel . . . I want to help you . . . _He didn't know that it was that very offer of assistance that was at the root of Albel's greatest fear.

When Albel's mouth opened in a silent scream and his face contorted in agony, Fayt decided that he had seen enough. Albel would never forgive him for the intrusion, but there was no way he would sit idly by and watch as another suffered.

"Albel!" Fayt laid a hand on the other man's chest to steady him, before he gave Albel a firm shake to rouse him.

The sleeping man frowned at the sound of his name, or perhaps it was Fayt's voice and touch which finally made it through to him. Either way, the swordsman's eyes slowly opened and the first thing they saw was a relieved Fayt, who was very much alive, contrary to his nightmare.

Albel blinked in disbelief and quickly came to his senses. As the Wicked One sat up, he sent the bed sheets sliding off him and Fayt's hand fell into his lap. His Fayt, the real Fayt, was alive and well. _He's safe. I didn't kill him . . . yet._ Albel raised a hand and cautiously pressed it against Fayt's cheek to test his authenticity, which resulted in a flourish of red blossoming on the boy's pale face. _Fayt . . . _Albel's eyes were becoming moist with sleepy happiness as he stared into the depths of Fayt's shy and slightly confused green orbs.

Still drowsy and feeling damned relieved, Albel did the unthinkable and pulled Fayt closer for a brief embrace. Holding the boy tight against his chest, Albel sighed and closed his eyes once again, nestling his face between neck and shoulder of the younger man before breathing in, catching the familiar scent of Fayt in the air. _He's not fighting me, I wonder if . . . _Albel's eyes flew open as he remembered the state Fayt was in when they came to the inn. The boy should _not_ have been at his bedside._ He's probably too sick to resist me._ Albel moved his head slightly until his cheek rubbed against Fayt's, whose face was once again burning with fever.

_Is it just a moment of weakness on his part, or something more?_ Fayt remained perfectly still, giving himself over completely to Albel. _Whatever happened must have been horrible, if he's acting like this. _It felt wonderful, and Fayt was hesitant to stop whatever it was that Albel was doing to him, but he thought it would be nice to hear an explanation for the sudden change in temperament. This wasn't the Albel he was used to, and to be perfectly honest, he was feeling slightly uncomfortable.

"A-Are you awake, Albel?" Fayt asked quietly, wondering if the other man was actually sleep-hugging him without knowledge of his actions. The address brought Albel back to reality, and he hastily pushed Fayt away. His heartbeat pounded out a warning and Albel quickly struggled to recover from his dangerous lapse in behavior.

Fayt stifled a grin at Albel's forceful rejection and decided to play innocent. It was the least he could do for the poor swordsman who had obviously been shaken up by his own actions. The man was so stunned that he didn't even register the gentle hand which still rested on his lap. Albel may have tried to keep them separated, but Fayt refused to give up so easily.

"I . . . I heard you call my name? What's wrong?"

Fayt's friendly concern, was tempting and it almost lured Albel back into another random act of affection. _He heard me, and he came because I called him. What else would he do for me? He'd probably go much too far to please me, or to help. He's sick, and tired, so why bother with me? _Albel frowned slightly as his thoughts deepened. _The fool values others before himself and that's a problem . . ._ Eventually he noticed the hand which was trembling quietly as it rested on him, and his eyes narrowed menacingly.

"Mind your own business, fool," Albel muttered finally in the familiar disgusted tone. "Go back to bed. And keep your hands to yourself," he finished, glancing first at the unwelcome hand before glaring at Fayt.

_Has he already forgotten that he was practically smothering me a couple minutes ago?_ "Sorry . . . Albel." Fayt withdrew his hand and held it against his own bare chest, as if it would return if given the slightest opportunity. Albel's eyes followed the retreating hand with a pang of regret and frowned. Fayt's behavior was peculiar, and he found it wretchedly alluring. Soft pink lips, slightly moist and glistening were captured in a thoughtful pout, as if Fayt was struggling with something. Warm green eyes, which flickered with a hint of sadness as they reflected the firelight, had been cast down to inspect the offending hand. The rebuke had obviously bothered him, more than he cared to show at the moment, but Albel recognized the signs.

"Fayt, do you . . . " Albel let his voice trail off. _Does he _want _to touch me? _Albel shook his head at the thought and forced the idea out. "Just leave me be, Fayt."

_At least he's using my name . . . _Fayt looked at him intently, unable to hide his concern. "Are you really okay?"

"I'm fine," Albel assured him with an angry scowl.

_He's always "fine," even when I know he's not. _Fayt sighed deeply and gave up. It was late, he was tired, and it was just easier to let Albel win. "All right," he conceded. "Get some rest then. I'll leave you alone, if that's what you want . . . "

"Hmph. Of course that's what I want, maggot! I don't need a shoulder to cry on, if that's what you're hoping for."

Fayt chuckled softly at the older man's defensive behavior. "It'd be nice, you know . . . "

_What? _Albel gave him a blank stare, clearly surprised by his words.

" . . . If you would open up to me. Most people don't scream in their sleep like that, just you. If there's something on your mind, you could tell me. I'll listen." _Why would he cry out for me?_

"Why?" Albel asked suspiciously, his eyes narrowing in an effort to see through the young man who opposed him. He wanted to know Fayt's motivations, his drives, and anything else he could learn. Albel still could not unravel the mystery which was Fayt Leingod. The gentle nature which had calmed his anger on so many occasions was also the source of many frustrations. It infuriated him to know that Fayt even held such desires. Someone actually gave a damn and wanted to know his problems instead of shrugging it off, and his own reaction to the prospect was beyond confusing. It shouldn't have mattered what Fayt wanted, or why he wanted it, but it did matter and there was no denying the fact. He was almost tempted to drop the pretext and reveal everything. How could he allow someone to affect him to this extent?

_"Why?" _The word said so many things, asking innumerable questions that few would have been able to decipher, but Fayt could see them all. Still, he chose to answer the one which was closest to his heart. "I worry about you sometimes," he confessed, never losing contact with Albel's hesitant eyes. "I care . . . about you . . ."It was an honest, and relatively safe answer since Fayt cared about _everyone_ who had travelled with him. Albel didn't need to know anything more than that. If he had admitted the _other_ feelings he had been having for the Glyphian, Albel would probably have torn him into little bits and pieces right then and there out of sheer anger, so Fayt kept his emotions in check._ I think about you all the time . . ._

"It's unnecessary," Albel said matter-of-factly. "I do not need your concern, fool. Your emotional frailty is not my problem. Did you think I would be grateful?" Albel crossed his arms and grinned as the malicious sparkle returned to his crimson eyes. "So the great Fayt Leingod cares about Albel the Wicked," he said with as much hurtful sarcasm as he could summon at such an hour. "But that means _nothing_ to me. You care for the lives of strangers, peasants, and even the beasts you are forced to slaughter in self defense. You cannot defend yourself with compassion, fool! When will you ever learn?"

Fayt met the devious stare with absolute confidence, as if he was completely immune to Albel's words. "I don't want to learn," Fayt replied calmly. "Compassion makes us human. Without it, you're no better that the beasts you kill. I don't want to be driven by anything else. But you're right about me, in a way. I watch over you because I'm worried, and neglect my own well-being. It may be foolish, but I'm not going to stop."

"Presumptuous worm! I don't recall giving you a choice in the matter!"

_As if he could stop me . . . _Fayt smiled and shook his head with frustrated amusement before interrupting his companion's potential tirade. "Good night, Albel," he said conclusively. "I'm not here to fight you, not tonight anyway." With a great effort, Fayt stood and turned his back to the seething swordsman who was not in the least bit pleased with Fayt's choice to end their conversation before he could be declared the winner.

"I'm not finished with you, maggot!" Albel reminded him, his voice threatening bodily harm if Fayt continued to ignore him.

Without turning to face the other man, Fayt shrugged and walked the short distance to his bed. As he crawled underneath the covers, Fayt lobbed one more verbal volley. "Go to sleep, Albel. Or do I have to come over there and tuck you in? You're not afraid to sleep alone are you?" Fayt taunted sweetly from under his own covers.

Instead of reacting with an angry counter attack, which Fayt no doubt expected, Albel calmed himself and regained his usual composure. "Be quiet, _fool_," Albel answered smoothly. "We're done. I refuse to play with you any longer." His tone was good humoured, and Fayt could almost picture the smile on the Wicked One's face. Albel had the last word, and yet another victory. His anger had subsided, the emotional turmoil and confusion had been replaced by familiar interactions, and the dream had been long forgotten, at least for the moment.

Albel settled down and made himself comfortable, choosing to lie on his side with his back toward Fayt. He rested his tired head on his pillow, but he did not fall asleep immediately. Albel continued to stare thoughtfully into the darkness, reflecting upon his conflicting emotions. The discussion with Fayt had taken his mind off the nightmare, but without him around, Albel had nothing else to consider but the implications of what he had imagined. For several minutes, Albel systematically ran through the events of his nighttime horror, intending to analyze everything in a way which would suit him best. Most of it was normal. His hatred, his guilt, and the punishment for his weakness were all familiar to him, but the inclusion of Fayt was something he had not been prepared for, and his purpose in the dream had seemed all too clear. He needed someone to love him, and he wanted somebody to love, but he was afraid.

It was a valid deduction, but he still wasn't willing to believe it. Logic, twisted reason, and old habits were hard to overcome, and in the end, Albel took the path of least resistance. He denied everything, and found comfort in avoiding the issue. He couldn't afford to have feelings, because they would only bring him further pain. His dream had been a lie, nothing more. Feelings for that fool were impossible, and his fears were irrational. "Complete, and utter nonsense," he grumbled aloud, as if voicing his opinion would verify it, but Fayt's obvious attachment, which had been made painfully clear when he awoke, haunted him and it made him wish for something more despite his aversion.

Albel remained awake for a little while longer. The fear of further dreams stopped him from actively seeking sleep, but eventually his sad, red eyes drooped shut, and Albel began to sleep soundly. It was a rare occurrence for him, and if it had lasted, it would have been even rarer, but fate had something else planned for the emotionally exhausted Albel Nox which would only confuse him further.

ooooo

The presence of a strange, and completely unfamiliar sound from the other side of the room startled Albel from his shallow sleep. Rising to his feet, Albel crossed the room, and stood over his companion's bed, being careful not to wake Fayt until he had figured out what exactly was going on. Earlier, the exhausted boy had rolled over and curled into a more comfortable position. He had been so peaceful, but now he sobbed quietly in his sleep.

In the time they had spent travelling together with the others, Albel had never seen Fayt cry, not even after his father's death. By keeping his emotions bottled up inside, Fayt had always been able to present a brave front for the sake of his companions. Albel had felt a strange kinship with the young leader then. Fayt needed to be strong, and he could only accomplish this by focusing on the present, ignoring his pain, and never showing weakness no matter how much he was hurting inside. The others had depended on him for guidance, and if he had ever let the pressure get to him, they would have been lost and the universe doomed. _It was unfair to expect that of him . . . _

Even now he kept on smiling, and never allowed anyone to see the pain, guilt and fear which gnawed at him constantly. _Is this true strength?_ Albel thought to himself. _Is it better to value the needs of others before your own, or hide yourself and your emotions effectively? He is even more skilled than I. _

While Albel hid behind hatred, Fayt hid behind happiness and in a way, they were still playing their respective roles of the pure hero and the tainted villain, but the lines between them were beginning to blur. I _suppose that is partly why he sees through me so easily . . . They say it takes one to know one, but I never realized . . ._

Albel sat down beside the seemingly fragile boy and stretched his arm out toward Fayt's cheek. Tentatively, he brushed the tears away, wiping them from Fayt's eyes. What was it about Fayt's pain that saddened him?

_I should enjoy this. He's not perfect, and his emotions make him an easy target. Isn't this what I wanted? To break his will? Prove to the fool that life is painful, and there is little to smile about? How could I have known that he had already learned that lesson almost as well as I have? _

Albel had been deceived by those bright smiling eyes just like everyone else, but Fayt had been able to see past his brutality and could probably guess the reasons behind it. Fayt had tried to make Albel feel welcome. He had accepted him when no one else would and quickly offered his trust. Had Fayt been suffering then as well?

Those piercing green eyes had sensed the wounds deep within him, the self loathing which prevented him from trusting others, and the ever present fear that his weakness would put anyone he cared for in jeopardy. If he didn't care, he couldn't hurt and if he kept everyone at a distance he would never again feel the agonizing pain of loss. After all, he couldn't lose something he didn't have to begin with.

Fayt had tried to help him, and show him that it was okay to let his guard down, but Albel had continually pushed him away. He regretted it now, realizing that he may have lost his last chance for happiness. But maybe all hope was not lost as far as Fayt's troubles were concerned. Albel wondered if there was anyway he could help to ease the boy's pain while forgetting his own in the process. _I wonder if that's what he wants? The little worm thinks we both need healing . . ._ _and perhaps he's right. _

The tears were still flowing steadily when Fayt began to mumble sheepishly. Albel listened intently, hoping to catch some clue which would reveal the exact reason for Fayt's depression. He had guessed some of the possible reason's for Fayt's sadness, but he wanted confirmation.

Fayt's hands clenched into fists and his brow furrowed with apprehension. His sleepy voice trembled with grief as it described the sins of his past. "They're all dead because of me. It hurts. It's my fault. It's always my fault. I'm sorry. I wasn't strong enough. Forgive me."

"Foolish maggot, you can't take the blame for everything that's happened." Albel had only been muttering to himself, but Fayt had heard him.

"Albel?" Fayt whispered hopefully.

"I'm right here, fool."

"But you can't be. You died. I couldn't . . ." Fayt's voice faded, as if he couldn't bring himself to admit his failure.

Albel grimaced as he imagined what Fayt's nightmares must be like. Surrounded by his fallen comrades, Fayt would be left alone after failing to protect them, or feeling guilty because they had died protecting him. _It's the same as . . ._ Albel had never sympathized with anyone, but he understood, better than anyone, what Fayt must be feeling. _His father also died protecting him, and he was forced to move on. There was no time for mourning . . . _

"Everyone I love dies . . ."

_Fool . . ._

Running his fingers through Fayt's soft blue hair, Albel wondered if the boy included him with his loved ones. It had been so long since anyone had loved him, no one had except his father, and even back then he hadn't been able to appreciate it. It wasn't until after his father was gone and he was alone that he realized how much he missed it.

Self-confident words of comfort were all he could offer. "Don't worry, fool. I'm alright. You were mistaken. I don't die that easily." His voice was quiet, displaying a tenderness that had never been revealed before as the feelings he was trying hard to stifle leaked out with his words. Hopefully this would be one dream where Fayt had at least one person left alive with him, though he would probably be disappointed when it turned out to be Albel the Wicked. _What a poor consolation._

Needless to say, he was surprised when Fayt's features softened and a half smile appeared. "I'm glad," was all he said but the relief that this news brought him was obvious. His reaction prompted Albel to try something else. He wanted more information.

"Tell me something, Fayt."

"Anything."

"Do you love me, like you love everyone else?"

Fayt's brow was furrowed as if deep in thought for a while before he offered an answer. "No Albel . . ."

Albel looked away. He was ashamed of himself for wanting another answer, and for being deluded enough to think it was possible for the boy to love him. It was just as he had suspected. _How could anyone love me? _He had dared to hope, and the punishment was severe. Fayt didn't want him, Fayt wouldn't stay with him, and Fayt wouldn't save him from himself. He would be left alone to fight the demons which sought his soul, his heart, and his life as payment for the sins and failures of his past because no one else would claim them.

"Heh, I figured as much. It's not important anyway." Albel bowed his head in defeat, and his shoulders sagged as he spoke, his tone betraying a layer of gentle despair. He tried to mask the pain with arrogance, but his voice was shaking. Albel felt himself falling once again into the dark abyss of loneliness and quickly fought to harden his heart against the sudden, unexpected feelings of disappointment. It hurt. _Why the hell does it hurt so much to learn that the fool doesn't care for me in that way?_

_He's made me weak. _

"No Albel, you don't understand," Fayt's voice was troubled and his face was twisted in frustration. "I love you _more_ than anyone else."

_What?_

When he had removed Fayt's clothing, he had been too tired to truly appreciate the finer aspects of the young man's body, but now his gaze was drawn toward it against his will. Flawless skin practically begged to be touched. Fayt's soft, delicate, facial features were also appealing, and even more attractive when they were expressing hidden desire. Albel shifted his position so that he was straddling the sleeping boy, and stared fixedly at the one who had dominated his thoughts for so long.

_I have to know . . ._

Summoning his courage, Albel leaned over and gave Fayt an experimental kiss, enveloping the boy's lips with his own and Fayt returned the gesture with a ferocity Albel hadn't expected. For several seconds, they remained locked together, the moist tongue of Albel the Wicked gently prodding Fayt's mouth for entry which was hastily given. He helped himself to the banquet of sensations the boy offered him in the form of scents, tastes, textures and . . . sounds as Fayt moaned softly with impatience, invading and razing his fragile nerves with heightened desire.

Memories of his dream were overlapping with this new, tangible reality and Albel closed his eyes in order to envision and recall the warmth and lightheadedness the Fayt spectre had brought him. There was no comparison. A living, breathing, squirming Fayt was infinitely preferable.

Through the thin sheets, he could feel Fayt harden beneath him, and Albel was mortified to feel his own body react to Fayt's arousal. When Fayt started to writhe against him in pursuit of further gratification, Albel's discomfort grew, and so did his eager erection until it became unbearable. His body couldn't resist the pleasure Fayt was supplying him with, and it needed the release which he was not prepared to provide. Before it could go farther, Albel caught himself and broke their kiss. _I'm not supposed to want this!_ _I shouldn't want _him! _I can't . . . _

But Fayt was not finished with him. In a sleepy trance Fayt's hands groped the darkness, apparently searching for something, and they found Albel's warm midsection. His hands caressed the exposed flesh, causing the older man to tremble slightly. _Is this what pleasure feels like? _Albel was so used to pain being inflicted on his body that Fayt's gentle touch was a welcome change. _What is more gratifying than a lover's touch? Lover?_ _What am I thinking?_

Albel was still unsure of himself and he wondered what it was exactly that Fayt wanted from him. Was it just physical companionship the boy craved, or was he expecting some kind of emotional commitment as well? Even as his mind turned over these complexities, Fayt's hands were creeping slowly up his back, and slipping under his shirt. Albel's lips curled into a sneer when he felt the boy's fingernails digging into his taunt flesh as Fayt tightened his grip. Without warning, Fayt pulled him closer and Albel gasped involuntarily. It had been sudden, and he had certainly not expected Fayt to be so forward, even if the boy did believe that it was just a dream.

With Albel lying on top of Fayt, they were practically face to face. A pair of emerald eyes opened briefly and Fayt was able to make out the unmistakable shape of the swordsman's slender body in the warm glow from the fireplace. Fayt could see him, but his mind was still fevered and still very much asleep. As far as he knew, Albel was just a figment of his imagination.

"Albel the Wicked in my bed?" He mumbled happily before he shut his eyes again. "I must be dreaming." Albel heaved a sigh of relief, Fayt still had no clue what was happening, and to be honest, neither did he.

Albel didn't know what he wanted. He could wake Fayt, and entice the boy into a physical union which he obviously wanted, but didn't have the courage to ask for when they were awake, or he could ignore everything as usual and pretend that his feelings didn't exist. He was still undecided when he felt Fayt's hands slide down his back toward his waist. Immediately, Albel became suspicious, and when those same hands started to remove his skirt, he became downright furious. His decision had been made. _I can't . . ._ _I _won't_ allow him to do this to me._

Albel rolled away from Fayt's grasp and hastily removed himself from the bed. Unsatisfied. When the comforting source of warmth had vanished, Fayt whimpered sadly at his absence, and Albel's desire for the slender boy grew strong once again, but he would have none of it. A sharp, and somewhat painful pang of arousal made him groan, and it reminded him that even if he had decided things were over, his body still wanted more. Albel peered down his skirt at himself and determined that he was too far gone. Stimulation left untreated was unhealthy, and there was not enough cold water on the planet which would relieve him this time.

Albel frowned and gritted his teeth as he faced the fireplace and lowered his garments. With a heavy sigh, Albel cupped his length in his good hand, and pumped, his motions fast and determined. With each master stroke he wished for release of the tension, prayed for the throbbing of his lust to cease and banish the desire which had reduced him to this state, this animalistic act of self gratification. But it wasn't the act which bothered him most. Rage claimed him and caused him to redouble his efforts because the reason for all of his confusion was untouchable, and restricted. Fayt was forbidden to him because he could not bring himself to admit his need.

His thoughts flooded with images of Fayt as he worked himself to the edge of angry pleasure which felt so good, even though he hated himself for needing to do it. Resting one arm on the stonework of the fireplace, Albel leaned forward and shut his eyes as he concentrated. _I could be with him . . . _A frustrated growl escaped him, giving voice to his misery, and when it was through, his mouth remained agape, which allowed tiny, indiscernible grunts of pleasure to spill from him.

From the younger man's bed, he could hear the pleasant mumbles of happiness as Fayt continued the "dream" without him, and upon hearing the boy's pleasing moans, Albel was torn between anger and fierce excitement. _The mere thought of _me_, and he makes such a commotion._ _What would he do with the real thing?_ _For that matter, what would I do with him . . ._

As his climax loomed nearer, Albel gripped himself tighter, punishing his body for its urges. The pattern of his breathing changed, and he began to pant heavily. His fingers were becoming slick with sweat as he continued, one hand sliding easily over his sensitive skin and drawing him closer to the end or his ordeal.

Albel's eyes flew open and blazed with frenzied satisfaction in the light from the fire. He shuddered, and a staggered moan broke from his lips as he felt tight muscles contract. With a violent spasm he came, releasing his seed into the fireplace, and effectively dooming millions of potential baby Nox's to death in the inferno.

His tired body sagged against the mantel, thoroughly exhausted from his efforts, and Albel watched with dull eyes as the flames of the fire danced lazily before him. "Fayt . . . " he sighed with a hint of sadness. Though he cursed the name of the wretch who had done this to him, Fayt was now the only person he could associate with his furious passion. No one else would do.

Once it was over, and his lust was spent, Albel was faced with one aspect of reality he hadn't been prepared for. Regret. Albel suddenly felt incredibly tired and worn out, as if he had lived much longer than his twenty-four years. He was tired of the games, the denial, the pain, and deathly tired of being alone, but he still felt powerless to do anything which would change the course of his life.

Unable to face his bed again, where dreams of a certain green-eyed boy threatened to taunt him with visions of happiness, Albel repositioned his clothes, and left their shared room, shutting the door quietly behind him. Fayt's happy whimpers followed him into the hallway, and the older man ignored them as best he could. _Dream on, fool. It's all you will ever have. May it protect you from your nightmares._

ooooo

A/N: It was another late night update, and one again, I'm tired. It's hard to write a chapter about sleeping when your sleep deprived XD. Nice reviews give me pleasant dreams, so please, be kind I don't want to have nightmares ;.;


	10. Complications

**Title: **Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 10:** Complications

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean.

**A/N:** Well folks, we've made it to chapter ten! It's such a nice number, (two digits and all), and honestly, I wasn't sure that I'd ever get this far. So thanks to everyone for sticking with it and being so damn nice the whole time!

Oh my, did I have trouble with this one . . . I don't really know why either. I had some ideas, but then I had a problem with writing everything so it would flow nicely. Perhaps I was distracted by upcoming chapters XD It was just more fun to write what's going to happen then what's supposed to be happening.

With that whining aside, I shall move on to happier things! Last chapter I was blown away by the number of reviews which came in, and it gave me an idea for a little reward for all the great feedback. The homepage link on my (very sparse and sad) profile will now take you to a piece of craptacular fanart, done by yours truly with the help of the bucket fill tool XD It's nothing fancy, but it just might elicit a smile.

ooooo

After exiting the room, Albel made his way to the lobby, cast an indifferent glance toward the innkeeper who was mumbling pleasantries as she slept at her post, and promptly left the building without being noticed. A late night walk would calm him, and if that failed he could always leave the city and partake in random acts of violence against whatever innocent creatures were foolish enough to come near the city walls.

The swordsman took a moment to survey his surroundings and breathed in deep with a hint of relief in his manner. The inn had been suffocating, but now there was plenty of room to breathe, and consider the things which had driven him out into the cold. He noted that the air was crisp and fresh, as was always the case in the colder regions, but the actual landscape was not nearly as pleasant. Airyglyph was cursed with being perpetually dismal and colourless. The brown buildings coupled with the vacant whiteness of snow-covered roads and rooftops were hardly the kind of sight which would warm your heart or please the eyes. Compared to the lively towns of Aquaria, the Glyphian royal city was a dreary failure. It was unimpressive to the extreme, and thoroughly depressing. This was especially true in the dark hours of morning before sunrise, when the only light available for guidance was the cold glow of the moon. It was easy to see how such a place could have influenced the development, and encouraged the harsh nature of the Wicked One.

It was cold outside, but not enough to cause Albel any significant discomfort, adorned as he was in the usual attire. He had left his outer coat at the inn, preferring to test his tolerance to the weather. Anyone with half a brain knew that there was nothing to be gained from being outdoors at such an hour, yet the rational portion of Albel's mind had been superceded and overruled by questions for which answers were not forthcoming. As strange as it was, having the world enshrouded in the black of night soothed the brooding man. It suited his mood. Everything was peaceful and calm in the dead of night. No one was stirring and this meant that Albel had gained the one thing he had always gravitated toward. Solitude. He was completely alone. It was something he had become used to, yet there was now the possibility for something different, and Albel wondered if keeping to himself would be comforting like it had always been or if he would continue to feel the stirring of loneliness which plagued him when he wasn't being accompanied by a certain blue-haired Embodiment of Destruction. But how could the peerless loner Albel Nox ever admit that he liked having company as he walked the well-worn path of self deprecation?

Albel glanced around the city once again, selected a direction and continued stalking through Airyglyph's back alleys. Eventually he would end up at the castle, but until then there was ample time to follow his thoughts to their conclusion.

Being around Fayt was, in some ways, intoxicating. The young man's optimistic ideals and beliefs could easily be dismissed as wishful thinking, but Albel could not ignore the times when what Fayt said actually made sense. Unlike anyone else, Fayt was intellectually stimulating, though this was due in no small part to the fact that he was not native to Elicoor. The strange views on life and how to live it which Fayt expressed often, and without hesitation, were intriguing to say the least. The two men often discussed and disagreed on personal philosophies, yet Fayt was never put off by Albel's disturbing observations of human nature. He made the effort to understand where his opponent was coming from, and willingly made concessions when necessary instead of dismissing his ideas altogether. It was this wholehearted acceptance which had made it easier for him to open up, little by little, and allow Fayt rare glimpses into his character. He felt some strange need to show Fayt the reasons behind his assertions, as if understanding would excuse his behaviour. It was only fair. Fayt was always open and honest with him, and that kind of trust deserved the same.

As time passed, he had begun to feel something other than the usual contempt whenever they were together, though his emotions weren't always positive. Fayt had the ability to anger him without saying a word, to calm him with a smile, and challenge him in ways no other living person would dare. They already spent an absurd amount of time together, so it was only natural to become closer. But the problem had gone beyond that.

His obsession with Fayt had started harmlessly enough when the boy was merely another enemy. Then he had become a challenge, and afterwards an ally, a friend and finally Fayt had wormed his way into Albel's heart, though he was unwilling to acknowledge just how much things had changed, nor would he ever admit that what he had felt when he had confronted Fayt could be anything other than misdirected physical desire. Lust was all he had been feeling, and that kiss had proven it once and for all. There was nothing more between them, at least nothing romantic, or idealistically meaningful. If it was only lust, then it was something he could conquer and overcome without great difficulty.

It occurred to Albel as he walked on through the empty streets that perhaps the only solution might be to indulge himself, at least once. _He's certainly physically appealing, but so what? I could use him. It would be interesting at the very least_. If Fayt truly wanted him that badly, then surely the boy would not refuse him. But something held his thoughts in check. Albel knew that using Fayt in that manner would most likely destroy everything that had formed between them, and it would be a violation of the trust Fayt had placed in him. _But isn't that the goal? To alienate him forever, and never fall into the trap of love where only pain waits to greet those foolish enough to fall for its tempting, yet empty promises of happiness? _Love! That word had entered his thoughts unbidden once again.

There were so many problems associated with that one word that Albel was finding it difficult to sort through them and discover the real reasons behind his hesitation. Did he really want to protect Fayt from being hurt? Or was that just an excuse to protect himself? Love was frightening, and Albel couldn't shake the idea that the black hole of commitment would swallow him, wiping away any trace of the man he had become.

_So? You hate who you are. Why not change?_ The thought popped into his head and challenged his resolve.

"I can't," he answered to the night, allowing the darkness to consume his words.

_You mean you won't._

Despite the emotional prompting, his thoughts remained muddled and clouded with uncertainties. Like a beacon in the fog of desire, Albel's instincts returned to guide him through this new situation. To love was a weakness. Allowing someone to love him was even worse because of the potential dangers to both himself and his partner. His old logic was at war with his heart, constantly fighting against the new things Fayt had taught him which had started to influence his behaviour, and he was losing sight of himself under a barrage of emotions. At the moment, he was helpless. Albel was drowning in a sea of kindness he didn't deserve and had done nothing to earn, nor did he want it. Hatred, of self and others, was his life saver. _Hate him, and everything he offers you. It cannot be trusted. _

Besides, what proof did he really have of Fayt's feelings toward him? One insightful nightmare and a fevered confession were hardly things to write home about. It was entirely possible that what Fayt supposedly felt for him was just a passing phase. He had seen no other indication of Fayt's taste in men aside from a couple furtive glances and tender smiles which the boy had sent his way. In fact, he had always been excessively kind to the women in their party, yet he had not really shown any romantic interest in any of them, even though it was obvious that at least a couple of them were interested in something more than friendship with the oblivious Fayt._ So at what stage does a friend become a lover?_

Not that it would make a difference how the fool felt. Albel had already made his decision. He would remain alone and rely completely on his own strength. By doing so he would prove to himself that he was no longer the pathetic child who had lost to the dragons on that fateful day. Any investment of emotions in another would only end in tragedy and pain, which were two things Albel couldn't risk. Fayt would not change him. Albel the Wicked would not be reduced to an emotional basket case on account of one good-natured boy.

These were the things Albel told himself, the same old excuses which had worn as thin as a threadbare blanket. They would not protect him forever, and through the gaps in his protective exterior of icy indifference, and less than polite arrogance were raw patches of self-doubt which went beyond the usual fears of being weak. He was, at least in part, afraid of rejection, based on the idea that he wasn't good enough. What was it that Fayt saw in him that he couldn't see in himself?

Albel voiced his decision to the darkness, as if it was the only thing which would understand. "I _don't_ need him. I don't _need_ anyone, and _no one_ needs me. Why should that fool settle for someone like me? I'll hate him, and he'll thank me for it. I'm not a burden anyone should bear, and I'll only bring him pain. He's still young. He doesn't know what he wants. I know what I _don't _want."

_To be alone?_

"Damn."

Albel shook his head. It just wasn't possible.

_And why not?_ The voice from within whispered.

_I don't know anymore . . ._ The excuses had run out, and only fear of the unknown remained.

Thoroughly discouraged, Albel quickly made his way to the castle. Dawn would break soon, and there was a good chance he could catch the king off guard with an early morning report. If Arzei was even the least bit sleepy, it would shorten their meeting immensely and Albel would be free to go about his business.

ooooo

The guards at the castle gates welcomed him with the usual slovenly mutters of admiration, and then apologizing profusely for wasting his time with unnecessary praise. Without waiting for them to finish, Albel pushed past them and into the castle proper, heading directly for the second floor in search of his king.

Arzei was wide awake, and apparently unsurprised to see the young captain. He greeted Albel with a smile and the two exchanged pleasantries before getting to the heart of the matter at hand.

In a voice which clearly expressed his impatience and utter boredom with his task, Albel explained and recounted the events which had taken place the past couple of days. Of course he chose to omit several of the more . . . interesting . . . details of his time with Fayt, and the king did not seem to notice. As he came to the end of his report, Albel prepared to go, but Arzei beckoned him to stay.

"I've one more question for you, Albel. How long do you suppose Master Fayt will be staying here in Airyglyph?"

Albel shrugged. "For as long as he wants, I would assume."

"You haven't grown tired of him?"

"Not as long as he makes himself useful, why?" Albel narrowed his eyes at Arzei in suspicion. "Do you want him to leave?"

Flustered, the king replied quickly and to Albel's ears he did not sound entirely convincing. "'No, that's not it. The boy has proven to be a great asset to the kingdom but . . . there are some concerns."

"Such as?" Albel couldn't suppress his distrust and anger was beginning to assault his previous calm.

"Firstly, and to be honest it is not really a problem, but the boy has sworn no loyalty to this kingdom, yet he assists us. How can I be certain that he will not turn against us?"

"There are no certainties in life, nor does an oath of loyalty prove one's dedication. Fayt has already admitted that he does not remain here for the sake of Airyglyph alone. He desires freedom from restrictions and the ability to do as he pleases and I see nothing wrong with that." Albel glowered at his king, daring the man to question Fayt's character again.

"If he does not care for Airyglyph then why . . . ? He stays here for your sake, doesn't he?"

"I am not aware of his reasons, nor do they concern me, and they should not concern _you_, either."

"Mind your tongue Albel! I am not one of your subordinates!"

Albel ignored the reprimand and continued to stare at Arzei discontentedly. "Is that all? Am I free to go, or is there something more you wish to discuss?"

"There is one other thing. I've received word from Greeton. It seems that their king is also concerned about the boy's presence in our kingdom. They have accused us of harboring a weapon of war. How should I respond to their worries, hmm?"

That made Albel flinch, and for a brief moment he lost his composure. It was difficult for him to hear Fayt referred to as a weapon, especially when he knew how much it hurt his companion.

"I want you to keep a close eye on him. Monitor his movements and behaviours, and if he ever shows the slightest sign of insurrection, kill him. These are the only terms Greeton will accept."

"Preposterous!" Albel was livid. How could this upstart of a king even suggest such a thing? "After everything he's done for this kingdom and this world you would still sentence him to death just like that? The universe and everyone in it should be grateful to him, yet once their lives are no longer in danger, people become greedy, selfish and see enemies where there are none. Fools . . . I don't believe it!" _No matter where he goes . . . he will be persecuted . . . and he has done nothing to deserve it except exist._ Albel still could not admit loving the younger man, but he could sympathize, at least on some level, with Fayt's situation. Whether he could do anything to remedy it, was another matter entirely.

"Interesting," Arzei stroked his chin thoughtfully. "So now you're defending him? I never thought I'd see the day when Albel Nox spoke on behalf of someone else. Why does it matter to you what happens to him? From what I understood, you have only been using him to test your own strength."

"Do not misunderstand me. I am merely pointing out what should be obvious to anyone who is not blinded by fear. There is no reason to fear him. The evidence in his favour is overwhelming. I saw firsthand how that maggot acts, and I've learned how he thinks, so I know that he's not a threat to anyone!"

"I see, but Greeton will not take your word for it, nor will they trust anyone who would be suspected of favouring the boy. They are dangerous . . ."

"Bah, the fools." Albel's body had stiffened with rage, and his hands were still clenched into tight fists. To lose his composure in such a way was a rare occurrence and it took all of his energy to calm himself. Anger would not help him win this battle, nor would it aid him in anything other than making a fool of _himself_.

Seeing the young man's frustrated distress, Arzei shook his head sadly. "I'm sorry Albel, but it's necessity. I don't like it either, but we cannot risk another war. Surely you of all people realize just how weak our military has become. The prolonged conflict with Aquaria was bad enough, but that other worldly attack decimated our forces. You've seen how empty this castle has become, and there are not enough able citizens in our country to replace the men we lost. If Greeton attacked us, we would lose, and I do _not_ want to risk my kingdom for the life of an outsider. Bear in mind that I'm really only asking you to watch him. I, too, doubt that there will be a need for such extreme measures, but we must take precautions."

Fear, not for himself, but for another worked its way to the forefront of Albel's thoughts as the truth of what was being said finally started to sink in. _They want him dead, not just sent away, but dead. And that bastard actually wants me to do it . . . _Albel searched his heart for the cold indifference which would come to his rescue, but it was a fruitless search. _I could never hurt him . . . _The thought was surprisingly comforting, and without realizing it, Albel smiled at his revelation. To betray the only one who cared for him was unthinkable. Even if he refused to reciprocate, it did not mean he could kill.

"At any rate," Arzei continued, "Greeton did not give any indication of what would be considered suspicious behaviour, so if you don't see anything then nothing can be done about it, correct? I have given you the order, which was my duty, and you may act as you see fit. It should not be a difficult task, since I understand that he feels closest to you. He trusts you, doesn't he?"

Albel nodded blankly, his eyes had become devoid of all emotions. They were hidden deeper. Far away from prying eyes, they were buried within him and Albel wasn't even sure if they existed. The trust that had grown between them, the trust that allowed the boy to love him, the most important thing Fayt had ever done for him would be used against them both. To exploit someone's trust was perhaps the most cowardly move one could make, yet it was also the most effective. As Albel remained silent, Arzei continued to drone on.

"Now can I count on you or should I assign someone else?" The king prompted finally, expecting the usual dutiful reply. Albel had always been somewhat rebellious, but in the end he usually complied with whatever was needed of him in times of war, and that one time when he had submitted to punishment. It was possible that this resigned loyalty was in part due to Glou, since Albel felt bound to the country which his father had supported. Albel was indebted for the loss he had caused, and he was constantly trying to fill the void that the death of his father had left in the kingdom, and in that way he would prove his worth. But if something had happened which made him feel differently about his situation, there was potential for disaster.

Still, Albel couldn't bring himself to answer. It was all too much for him to take in, and he had not finished analyzing every aspect of what was being asked, mainly because he had never expected anything like this to happen. And with that hesitation, Arzei's confidence faltered for a brief moment. Earlier he had believed what Albel had told him, and the worries professed by Greeton were not his own, yet to see one of his subjects show even the slightest suggestion of insubordination made him uneasy. He had fought desperately to gain the respect and adoration of his people ever since taking the throne under tumultuous circumstances. The aristocracy he had disbanded still waited patiently for his downfall, and one mistake could cost him everything. Any challenge to his position was dangerous, but if the challenger was someone like Albel, it would not bode well for him.

"Answer me! Is your loyalty with that child or with Airyglyph?"

_Fayt!_ His mind screamed without hesitation, and with enough force behind it to knock him out. But it was the wrong answer. "Airyglyph . . . " he replied softly, through pursed lips while keeping his eyes locked with Arzei's until the king cowered under his glare and turned away. Albel's eyes were determined, but his voice was completely emotionless. He had ceased to feel anything. It was easier that way. Besides, Albel knew that if he had answered any other way, he would have doomed them both. He would be killed for treason, and Fayt . . . would be too sick to fight them off without his help. _If I'm not careful . . . I could lose him . . . _

"Then you will accept this mission?"

Albel nodded. "I am the only one suitable for the task. I accept."

"Excellent!" It was false praise. "I knew you were the best one for the job." This too, was false confidence. "I trust you have no reservations?" The last question was more of a plea, than an assertion of trust.

_Is he blind?_ "Of course not," Albel snorted carelessly, maintaining the necessary mask of indifference which was all that stood between him and death. Convince them that he didn't care, and perhaps he would even convince himself. He would agree to the terms, but not without a final attempt at resistance. "One more death is nothing should it come to that, but I assure you, there is no need."

"Oh really, Albel." Arzei raised an eyebrow at his words. "And whatever would possess you to say such a thing? You haven't actually become fond of that boy have you? There have been rumours, you know . . ."

Albel growled in frustration. "I am well aware of those rumours, and I assure you that there is no truth to them. If I ever find the ones responsible for such lies, I'll . . ."

The king chuckled quietly, but to trained ears his mirth was hollow. "Yes, of course. You don't have to convince me. You are known for your solitary nature Albel, so I knew that you would never develop feelings for just anyone. Now, was there anything else you wanted to say?"

Albel nodded curtly and his eyes narrowed, marking his disdain as he spoke. "You have allowed another kingdom to influence you and it has affected your judgement. To be honest, it's pathetic. Fayt is the epitome of benevolence and compassion, and he only fights to protect what is dear to him. He is strong, but I've _never_ seen him abuse that power. Anyone who doubts this should reconsider their views." Albel turned his back to Arzei and excused himself from the audience chamber. As far as he was concerned, the conversation was over.

"Albel!" the king called to him, but it was beyond useless. His voice dropped to a contemplative whisper as Arzei spoke a warning to himself. "Ah, such arrogance. It could be dangerous . . . " _Perhaps those treason charges were justified . . ._ The worried king kept a watchful eye on Albel's retreating form, his expression betraying his growing suspicion of the man whom he had previously thought impervious to emotion. _If the two of them joined forces . . . Dear Gods . . ._

_Worm. You overestimate the power you wield, and underestimate mine. _With a dark scowl firmly in place, Albel headed down the narrow staircase which led to the ground floor and turned toward the kitchen, and entered without hesitation, intending to find food for himself and his companion whom he assumed was still sleeping soundly at the inn. Fayt would be starving, and he desperately needed to regain his strength. As Albel walked, the king's words haunted him. Hopelessness clouded his usually sharp mind for the first time in years, and Albel felt the seductive whispers of doubt enter his thoughts. They tempted him into uneasy feelings of inadequacy and his scowl deepened. _If Greeton comes for Fayt, I'm not strong enough to save him, unless we flee, but . . . _Albel shook his head sadly. There had to be another way.

In a trance, he collected various foodstuffs from the kitchen, mindlessly barking threats to the staff of cooks and bawling serving girls until the place had cleared out and he was left alone to perform his all-important task. He would feed Fayt, and ensure that the boy was properly nourished. Such actions could not be misconstrued as attachment by anyone who might be watching him after that incident with the king.

The mere thought of Fayt, and confused emotions welled up within him and battled for dominance. Love and lust, affection and desire, fear, uncertainty, hope, scorn, hatred, he was at a crossroads when it came to his true feelings, even though he thought he had figured everything out last night. Why did he really bother with getting food? He should force Fayt to get his own. That was what he would have done to anyone else.Did he do it to prove that Fayt needed him? Or was it because he enjoyed providing the boy with something which would increase his happiness? Why did he struggle to select only the foods he knew Fayt would be pleased to receive? How come he knew those foods in the first place? Why did it matter if Fayt was well fed when he was going to die?

Albel froze when the last thought ran through his head and the plate of food he had gathered clattered to the floor, shattering into small, indistinguishable pieces which resembled his current state of mind. _If I can't protect a plate of food, how am I supposed to protect that careless fool? _It was then that he realized the true danger was preoccupation. Thinking, worrying and focusing his attention on Fayt resulted in a loss of concentration which was bad enough when doing mundane chores such as preparing breakfast, but to have his attention divided like that in battle would be deadly. It had to stop, but he was afraid that it wouldn't be possible.

After that small incident, Albel concluded that his suspicions were correct. His emotions would get him killed, but even if his death was inevitable, and probably well-deserved, it was not Albel's greatest concern. _If I die, who will protect him?_ It was, perhaps, a foolish question. There were probably others from their group who would gladly step in to defend the boy if he was gone, but somehow he knew it wouldn't be enough. _He wants me, after all . . . at least, I think so . . . _

"Ah, Lord Albel," a nosy kitchen maid poked her head in the door. "Is something the matter?"

"Get out!" He growled through gritted teeth, yet his voice was strained.

The girl quickly retreated back into the hallway, but her high-pitched voice could be still be heard as she complained to her matron. "Eyah! You hear that ma'am? Didn't I say he was crazy? Why'd you have to make me check?" Outside the door, the youngster burst into tears and wailed her complaints to the castle walls, entreating any who would hear her to listen to the misery of her life. "He tried to kill me. I swear it! You can't trust him to be kind."

"Fucking maggots," Albel cursed quietly, as he tiptoed through the wreckage he had inflicted on the kitchen and started over again.

The second time around he compiled a veritable feast consisting of bread, cheese, fruit, a bottle of cider, and even a couple things for dessert. He had found them tucked safely away inside a locked cupboard which stored Arzei's personal rations. It would be good, he decided, to forget about everything and just relax, if only for a little while.

When he was finished, Albel exited the castle with his carefully wrapped bundle of food and made his way back to the inn, ignoring the overly curious stares as he strode purposefully through the city. The interest in his behaviour was growing as he continued down Airyglyph's main street. People couldn't understand where he could possibly be going, or why he was in such a hurry.

It didn't take him long to reach the inn and he entered swiftly, glancing once at the new clerk who had apparently relieved Jestrey for the morning shift, before heading down the hallway. Albel paused for a moment at the bedroom door before opening it, but before he had a chance to make a move, the door opened wide.

"Albel!" Fayt filled the doorway, and, much to Albel's relief, he was already dressed. "Where have you been?" he asked finally. "When I woke up this morning, you were gone and I didn't know why . . ."

Unsure of how to answer the boy's concern, Albel surprised himself with his next statement. "Were you worried?"

Fayt frowned slightly. "Not exactly, I know you can take care of yourself . . . I was just a little upset that you left without telling me . . ."

"Hmph." Albel slid passed the younger man and into the room. "Since when do I have to check with you before I do something? My business is my own, not yours."

Fayt let out a frustrated groan and shut the door. "It's just common courtesy! What if I had needed you for something?"

"Tell me another one Fayt! You don't need me for anything."

_That's not true . . . _"So why did you leave?"

Albel considered replying as he had been, accusing Fayt of prying in matters which did not concern him, but if he had kept it up, the boy would no doubt have become suspicious. "I had to give my report at the castle, that's all."

"Couldn't it have waited until later? You weren't exactly eager last night . . ."

"I . . ." Albel looked lost for a moment. Fayt was right, and he really didn't have a good reason to explain his behaviour. How could he admit that something had happened between them that frightened him away? Remembering his package, Albel thrust the food bundle toward Fayt. "I brought breakfast!" he declared finally.

"Albel . . . thank you." The warmth in Fayt's voice was unmistakably thick with emotion, and those two simple words carried with them so many things which neither of them was willing to say.

"It was nothing . . ." Albel scoffed with annoyance and crossed his arms in apparent anger, but as Fayt continued to smile at him, as if he could see right through the gestures, the posturing, Albel relaxed his defiant stance and gave in. ". . . You're welcome . . ." he whispered softly, heart flooding with happiness when he saw the grateful look on Fayt's face. Fayt was staring at him, and smiling like an idiot. It was the warmest smile Albel had ever seen Fayt give to anyone, and it was directed at him. It was happening again. Albel was losing the fiercest battle of his life, and he quickly turned his head and looked away before Fayt's happiness could have any effect on him. "Worm," he muttered halfheartedly as a faint smile appeared on his face briefly before returning to the usual indifferent scowl.

Fayt sighed happily and began to inspect the contents of Albel's offering. His eyes skimmed over the bread and fruit, since they were just the regular necessities, and nothing else caught his eye . . . until Fayt noticed a small, delicately wrapped packet which was nestled safely amidst the rest of the food.

Fayt's eyes widened with disbelief when he was finished unwrapping the packet. "Blueberry tarts? How the hell did you manage this?" _And why did he bother?_

An amused grin spread across Albel's features. Fayt was making it easy for him to forget his worries. "I serve only the best of course. It's a treat fit for a king, or rather it would have been. Let's just say that only one lock on a cupboard door is like an invitation . . ."

"You stole the king's food?" Fayt asked, incredulous.

"I prefer the term 'borrowed'"

"I'm sorry Albel, but the concept of borrowing only works if you intend to give something back, and I don't think the king will want these after we're finished with them . . ."

Albel shrugged and his grin stretched wider. "It's not my fault if he refuses to accept them."

Fayt shook his head and cracked a smile of his own. "I can't argue with your logic, Albel. Now are you going to get over here and help me destroy the evidence of your little kitchen raid?" Fayt said as he patted a spot on the bed beside where he was sitting. To his surprise, Albel complied without an argument and started to help himself to the gathered foodstuffs.

Fayt watched as his companion eagerly devoured one item after another. It pleased him to see Albel eating well for once. But there was more to it than that. There had been a shift in the older man's mood, and for the moment he was acting almost cheerful. Wickedly cheerful, but cheerful nonetheless.

"Be careful," Fayt taunted, "you don't want to ruin your figure, Albel."

"Hmph," was all the other man bothered to mumble as he crammed the last tart in his mouth. After chewing thoughtfully for a while, Albel spoke. "As soon as you're finished, we're leaving." The smile had left his face and Albel was completely serious. The sudden change in behaviour caught Fayt off guard, though he should have been used to the other man's mood swings by now.

"What? Why the hurry?"

He couldn't explain the real reason, so Albel had already thought up one which was at least somewhat conceivable. "Airyglyph is cold and barren . . . It makes me uneasy so I would like to leave as soon as possible." If that didn't work, nothing would. Fayt was easily lured by heartfelt confessions, so if he thought that Albel was being honest with him, and admitting a weakness, he would cave in an instant.

"But our things are still at the castle!" Fayt protested. They weren't exactly vital items, but . . .

"I'll send for them!" Albel answered in a tone which left no room for arguments.

"All right. Give me a couple minutes . . ." Fayt quickly finished his meal, and rummaged around the room for a few moments. He gathered up his sword and his coat, which were basically the only things that were still with him from their mountain trip, and set them on the bed as he strapped on his heavy battle armour.

"Well?" Albel asked finally.

"Okay, I'm ready," Fayt informed him with an irritated frown. "Patience is a virtue, you know."

"Bah, nonsense. Since when am I virtuous?"

Fayt chose the most favourable option and remained silent. This time he would not allow Albel to bait him into an argument. "Let's go," he said instead, and hastily exited the room before his companion had a chance to answer. Albel, slightly stunned by Fayt's response, had no choice but to follow the younger man outside.

As they left the inn, Fayt turned toward his companion in order to express his gratitude one last time. "Thanks again, Albel, and I don't mean thanks for the food. Thank you for everything that's happened the last few days. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have . . ."

"Be quiet, fool. There is no need for such sentiments. I look after you because it benefits me, that's all. I would gain nothing if you died before I could defeat you!"

_It's amazing how he can still say that with a straight face._ "You know what' s funny Albel?" Fayt grinned at him, eyes smiling heartily with knowledge. "After all this time, you've never tried."

"Tried what?" Albel replied impatiently as curiosity ran rampant through his thoughts. _What is the fool talking about?_

"To defeat me."

"Hmph. Arrogant worm. One of these days, when you least expect it . . ." Albel took a couple steps toward Fayt, who was still holding his ground and watching him expectantly, believing that he could handle whatever Albel might do to him. Fayt's emerald eyes looked on impassively as the older man stood before him. There was perhaps a hair's-breadth between their bodies, but Albel quickly closed the distance and leaned in closer until his lips were mere slivers away from Fayt's ear. The gauntlet arm of Albel the Wicked snaked gently around Fayt's neck, teasing the boy's tender throat with his claws, and making his prey's breath quicken with anxiety. It was the closest thing to an embrace he would allow himself to have. Knowing that it could be the last time he ever got so close, Albel was hesitant to break the contact_. It doesn't have to be the last . . . _The tension was tangible, and at its peak, Albel's voice dropped to a quiet whisper as one last threat flowed from his parted lips. "I'll make you regret those words."

The heated breath of the Wicked One flowed across Fayt's flesh, making him blush with desire as it caressed his skin, even as his body trembled with restrained fear. Albel's touch, even if malicious, was more than welcome. "I'd . . . like to see you try." He managed to utter the challenge with confidence and for a moment it seemed Fayt was going to have the last word, but his opponent was not prepared to admit defeat.

_The little fool doesn't know when to quit. _"You think I wouldn't kill you, is that it? I warned you not to trust so easily. Emotions make you vulnerable, Fayt. We are better off without them . . ." _Without each other . . . _

"Albel . . . ?" Fayt questioned softly as he felt something wet and gentle graze his ear, followed by the lightest touch of lips on his neck . . . as if to say . . .

_I'm sorry . . ._

The sudden sharp pain of Albel's claws digging into his flesh caused Fayt to cry out, his voice filled with unexpected pain and fear. And Albel smiled. For some reason, Fayt's pain was more gratifying than any other. He had killed so many, and heard their screams of terror, yet Fayt's expression was like a symphony composed for his ears alone. And yet he knew it was wrong to even entertain those kinds of thoughts. Still . . . _Lessons cannot be taught by a gentle hand._

Fayt reflexively wriggled away, wrenching himself from the grasp of the other man and quickly pressed a hand up against the back of his neck to stop the bleeding. The wound was harmless, but messy, and the pain was already fading. The shock however, was still fresh."What the hell was that for, Albel? That–"

"Hurt?" Albel smiled sadly. It had to be done. Glancing down at the weapon he called an arm, Albel noticed that his usually bright gauntlet was splattered slightly with blood. _Fayt's blood . . . _Raising his claws to his lips, Albel carefully licked the tainted blades. "Hmm, see? You trusted me, and look what happened. If you allow people to get close to you, it's an invitation to pain. Remember that, and take nothing for granted." _We'll see if he still wants to get close to me after _that_ little display_.

"Yeah, I get it," Fayt admitted wearily as his hand dropped from its place on his neck, "but you forgot something."

"Oh? And what would that be, maggot?" Albel asked, when curiosity got the better of him. Even after that, Fayt remained unfazed. Was it possible for someone to be so patient?

Fayt returned to the swordsman's side and fearlessly tapped Albel's gauntlet. "Only those who have known pain can truly appreciate pleasure, and the happiness it brings."

As Albel looked down upon the boy who was fighting for his heart, he noticed a new determined light in Fayt's eyes. He had only strengthened Fayt's resolve. "Fool," he remarked as he turned away from Fayt's unnerving gaze and started to walk toward the town's exit. _Insightful fool, _Albel thought silently, and he couldn't help but wonder if there was some truth in what Fayt had said.

ooooo

**A/N:** Well, that's that. Sorry for the wait . . . I hate taking this long! But the good news is that the next, -thinks a moment- four chapters, (depending on how I'm feeling), are mostly done :D They just need a little editing/tweaking and some TLC. Next chapter, Albel becomes acquainted with a wonderful thing called alcohol and you'll never guess what happens next. XD Really. I'm serious. It's not pretty. XD Anyone feel like leaving a review?


	11. The Fine Line Between Love and Hate

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 11:** The Fine Line Between Love and Hate

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean

**Warning:** Extremely bad movie references ahead. Please forgive me. I couldn't help myself. I wrote the latter half of this chapter during a Charlton Heston movie marathon and looking back I'm beginning to wonder if that was such a good idea . . .

**A/N:** This chapter has indeed been promised for a long time:) I apologize for taking so long to get around to it . . . And truth be told, parts of it were written even before chapter 1, so if the style seems drastically different, that's why. I also wrote parts of it to amuse myself . . . so you've been warned if there are things which seem a little . . . off. XD

ooooo

As they travelled thought the Traum Mountains on their way back to Kirlsa, Albel ranged ahead, clearing their path of vermin, and leaving only a trail of corpses behind. It was an enjoyable time for him, and he couldn't help himself from reacting positively to the mindless comfort which was only gained when killing the weak. There was no challenge, after all, so it was just the simple familiarity of the ritual which made the Wicked One smile slightly as he ended the lives of the undeserving, left, right and sideways.

Progressing at a much slower pace behind him was Fayt, and the boy was apparently in no mood to join in. The recollection of his nightmare, and the pleasant dream which had followed, had yet to reach his consciousness, and it was doubtful that he would ever learn the truth of his nighttime encounter. Even without knowing what had happened, there was something about last night that was bothering him, but he couldn't pinpoint the cause. Sleep had been difficult for him, and when he awoke, Fayt had felt the lingering traces of both hope, and sadness. Sickness and fever were surely to blame for some of it, though he imagined that they were only the unwelcome catalysts which had triggered hazy, pain-filled memories and current fears. It would take further pressure from an unexpected source to help him admit and confront the painful emotions which were just beyond his mental reach.

It didn't take long for his observant companion to notice that Fayt's behaviour had changed. Fayt seemed emotionally lost, and completely unaware of his surroundings. It wasn't normal, and the existence of an unhappy Fayt left Albel feeling empty himself . . . and guilty, as he began to wonder if what he had done earlier was to blame.

Though he was incapable of showing concern the usual ways, Albel _was_ able to design his own methods which would allow him to understand the problem without giving any indication that he actually cared. For this scenario, he chose to use Fayt's own argument to open the pathways of communication between them. This time his prying would take the form of a hypothetical discussion which would reveal more to the participants than either of them could have imagined.

Hesitantly, he approached his target while being careful not to appear too eager even though curiosity was causing his heartbeat to quicken. Before Fayt could even acknowledge his presence, Albel fell in beside the younger man and asked a preliminary question. "What's wrong with you, maggot? You're even more useless than usual."

"I'm sorry about that . . . It's nothing." Fayt turned and smiled sheepishly at him.

_You won't dismiss me with a smile. Not this time. _Something was very wrong. An apology without even some type of token resistance was unheard of for either of them. Fayt actually did concede to him on a regular basis, but to give up without any effort to challenge him meant that things were even worse than they had first appeared. _He was like this . . . when he slept. The pain is surfacing during the day and he can't understand why. _

It took a while for Albel to formulate a plan, and during that time the two men continued to walk together in silence, both of them fully absorbed in their own thoughts. Snow drifted and blew casually around them, dancing gracefully at their feet as if nature was trying desperately to lighten the mood by demonstrating its simple beauty. The mood remained dark though, and a happy resolution was looking less likely with every step taken. At length, Albel made his decision.

"This morning you spoke to me of pain, as if you understood everything about how I've suffered." As he spoke, Albel kept his eyes fixed on the landscape ahead of him, unwilling to show Fayt just how much the idea of being understood affected him. It was pleasing, almost rewarding to know that someone could know him so well and still be with him. "But what about your pain, Fayt. You've hidden it well all this time, and I'm almost certain no one else realized it, but you cannot fool me."

"I don't know what you're talking about. I have friends who care about me, a mother who loves me even though I haven't seen her in so long. I have a place to call home . . . " Without warning, Fayt became silent. What he said was true, but it wasn't the whole truth. Even these things which should have made him happy were now problematic. Not to mention the fact that he was still missing one very crucial element necessary to his happiness. Albel.

_I knew it . . . _"Just stop pretending," Albel suggested lightly, as if such a thing was easy. A moment later, when Fayt had failed to respond, his tone darkened. "You're not as happy as you let on. No one is."

"How would you know?" Fayt grumbled defensively. It was amazing to see how the tables had turned.

It was time. Albel had just the right piece of information to shatter Fayt's meager resistance. Knowing he had information was one thing, actually using it against the boy was another matter entirely. It might be helpful, and then again it might just backfire. Feeling slight regret for his actions, Albel glanced at Fayt for a moment as if measuring the outcome of what he was about to say. Looking the other way so he wouldn't see the boy's expression, he spoke softly. "You were crying in your sleep last night. I want to know why."

If Albel had been expecting Fayt to respond meekly, perhaps even tearing up again at the news, he was mistaken. "Since when do you care about me?" He had answered automatically, with uncharacteristic suspicion, and as soon as he said it, Fayt realized just how unfair the statement was. He had already come to the conclusion that Albel _did_ care, but for some reason the older man was still unwilling to show it.

True to his nature, Albel answered in a way which completely voided any possibility of deeper concern. "I don't care. I'm just curious. The more I know about you, the easier it will be for me to defeat you."

_He's resorted back to that old familiar crutch of an excuse? I get it. _Fayt smiled in spite of his bad mood and chose to play along. "Know your enemy before you know yourself, right Albel?"

"Precisely, worm." Albel flashed a brief grin at his answer. Whatever he was doing, it was working. Once Fayt was free of his depression, the boy would be able to confront his problems rationally. "I'm glad you are able to grasp such a simple concept." Condescending praise was another tried and true method, though only Fayt would be able to see the humour in his words, and hear the subtle pleasure in his voice.

"So you really want to know?" Fayt cocked his head to the side and shot a questioning look at Albel, who answered with a nod. His eyes remained locked with the other man's as Fayt gave his answer, smiling sadly all the while. "I'm afraid."

"Of what exactly?" Albel prompted calmly. If the admission of fear had come from anyone else, Albel would have berated them mercilessly for giving in to something so foolish. Being susceptible to fear and anxiety would only make you vulnerable, at least in most cases, yet Fayt had apparently been nurturing his fears for a long time without truly being affected by them. That alone was something Albel had to respect, although eliminating the fear completely would be preferable.

"I already told you once, Albel. Even if things seem to be going well, I'm still not safe and anyone associated with me is in danger. What makes it worse, is knowing that I don't have what it takes to protect the people I care about. My father . . . he . . . " Fayt bowed his head and became quiet once again. The pain of his loss was still fresh, and the guilt still had not left him.

"It's not just that one fear though, is it . . . ?"

_He's trying to understand. Albel . . . I never expected this._ "The things in the past . . . I can't change them, and I know that but . . . I still worry about what could happen because of them. Cliff told me that the Federation is still looking for Maria and myself, because we're dangerous, nothing more than a threat which needs to be held and monitored. You don't know what it's like to be hunted. At any moment the situation could change, and if they find me I'll lose everything . . ." _Including you . . ._

Albel remained quiet as he thought about Fayt's words. They were rational fears, not the shallow kind which would get you killed in battle. They were even somewhat similar to his own. Will-crushing fears, that make it difficult to face yourself every day. Fayt was afraid of something which he couldn't predict, or prepare for, and it was bringing him down.

Contrary to popular belief, Albel was not without a measure of compassion for those who deserved it, and Fayt was more than deserving. Like Albel, Fayt had lost things and people he had held dear. Furthermore, he was now forced to take shelter on a world which was alien to his own, but he made the best of it. No complaints, no self pity, Fayt had accepted his losses with grace and carried on, at least on the surface. Beneath his shroud of lighthearted cheerfulness, Fayt was still tormented by his experiences, his losses, and his debts to those he had failed. Even now that it was over, he wasn't safe from his past.

"It was always like this, even back on earth . . ."

"Hmm?"

"I was always in my father's shadow, known only because I was related to him when I just wanted to be accepted as myself. Even now, people look at me differently. I don't want to be known as Professor Leingod's son, or his experiment. I don't want to be a savior, and I don't want to be the embodiment of destruction anymore." The boy's determined voice dropped to a whisper, and his next words dissolved in the air, almost before Albel could catch them. "I . . . I just want to be Fayt."

Fayt sounded sad and even somewhat lonely, as if he knew it wasn't possible. Albel had never heard him sound so hopelessly discouraged. And he knew that Fayt was right. It reminded him of the prisoner exchange at the training facility where he had seen Fayt's enemies attempting to trade lives as if they were nothing but mere goods, and Fayt himself just a bargaining chip. Fayt's reputation would haunt him forever, for better or for worse, and that was something that Albel _the Wicked, _was well acquainted with.

"You can't change those things, fool. They are a part of you, and essential to your nature. They've made you who you are." _If you were anyone else, I wouldn't . . . _Albel quickly composed himself. His thoughts had almost wandered into dangerous territory. The emotional pull toward Fayt was growing, and he was finding it difficult to resist as he wished to do. What Fayt said next only deepened his unwanted concern.

"And who am I, Albel?" Fayt asked him. It was a rhetorical question, nothing more, but the self-mocking tone was an answer in itself. "What am I . . . ?" The mockery was gone, almost as swiftly as it had come. Fayt had become contemplative, and as the pair grew silent, so too did they seem to drift apart, the distance between them widening. Albel could not fight this battle for the world-weary Fayt, and there were no possible words of comfort he could offer even if he felt like it.

_Who the hell am I?_ For so many years he never knew. Fayt's parents had lied, and withheld information that might have changed everything but . . . it was for his own good. He knew that well, and he didn't blame them for any of it. How could he? They were only doing what they thought was the right thing for him. But it still hurt sometimes. Fayt had held out for a long time, but now he couldn't stop the tears from loosening ever so slightly.

"You really are pathetic, aren't you?" Albel taunted, shaking his head for emphasis as if he really couldn't believe it. "Tears are a sign of _weakness_, fool."

Fayt sighed, wiped the moist trails from his cheeks, and shook his head sadly. "Only the strong cry, Albel. It means that you have the power to confront the things which bring you pain. Crying shows that you're not afraid to feel, and emotions are powerful things. Only cowards run from them."

_So I'm just a coward?_ The elder man could not miss the accusatory nature of those words. Though he had believed that Fayt was weak for showing emotion, the boy maintained that it was the exact opposite. In that case, Albel would become the true weakling for abandoning emotions as useless forms of expression. Without warning, Albel's lips curled into a snarl, and he would have pointed out the futility of Fayt's argument, but the boy was not through.

"If you detach yourself from the world to such an extent, then you are guaranteeing that you'll never have to confront anything painful, never know temptation, never have to resist because you refuse to feel. True strength is being able to overcome the things that bring on the tears, not avoiding them all together. Avoidance is the same as escape, and fleeing from the things which are painful, including memories, and people, doesn't solve the problem. If you kill a beast, it's dead, right? But if you run away, it will follow you forever." The more he said, the deeper the words cut into Albel's own ideals, rendering them powerless.

Still, Albel refused to agree, no matter how much sense the younger man was making. "Foolish logic, Fayt. While you are struggling with your tears, and inner demons, the ones on the outside will have killed you ten times over." Little did Albel realize that he was systematically luring Fayt out of his depression by attacking his beliefs. There is no time for depression when you are forced to defend something you cherish.

"You're right." Fayt agreed easily enough because Albel had made a valid counterpoint, but he had prepared something of his own which would divert them both and coax Albel into discussing the unmentionable. "That's why I need someone I can rely on who will take care of things when I can't. I think everyone needs that, actually. It would be nice to have someone to guard you when you can't defend yourself."

"So you would let another person die for you while you're distracted with your own problems? How selfish."

"I didn't say that, and you know that's not the case. It's more complicated than needing a simple bodyguard. If that's all I wanted, I would have stayed with Cliff. I'm talking about the kind of person who's there to give you a reason to carry on, emotional support I guess. It's easier to confront your problems with the aid of another, instead of continually trying to do it alone."

Fayt closed his eyes and raised his head to face the sky. When he opened them again, they were sparkling with hope. "I guess I want somebody to love, and to find someone who'll love me back . . . even when they know the dangers . . . "

It was that day that the unexpected happened. For the first time ever, Albel the Wicked spoke seriously of love, with the only person he had ever considered worthy of the challenge. "And how will you know if someone loves you in that way?"_ When no one ever has. _

"The one who loves you most will stay with you no matter what, put up with all of your bad habits and love you for them. It will be someone who refuses to just ignore your faults and pretend that you're perfect. They see everything and love you anyway, knowing exactly who you are."

Having heard Fayt's thoughts, Albel voiced his own. "Sometimes it's easier not to get attached. Having feelings for someone affects your judgement, and distorts your ability to reason. Emotions, _especially_ _love,_ make you careless. They'll get you killed . . . "

"What do you mean?"

"Even if you desire to protect something, or someone, allowing the connection to go any deeper than that is dangerous. If you think with your heart, it will always betray you."

"Albel?" _He's serious . . ._

"Hmph. If you were in love with someone, and that person was attacked, what would you do? Fight to the bitter end, even if it was hopeless? Escape knowing that your loved one would die after watching you abandon them? Would you die with them? And what if you couldn't save them, even after doing everything in your power?"

"You've given this a lot of thought, haven't you?"

"It's necessary to understand all aspects of human nature. Then it becomes easier to take advantage of weaknesses, and by exposing them in others, you learn what to avoid. I will not die a fool's death." _Or have anyone else die for me._

"Well I would rather have a short life filled with joy, then a long life filled with sorrow, regret, and loneliness. Most people would agree with me."

"That's because most people are fools."

_Most people? Not all? _"Do you think I'm a fool, Albel?" Fayt blinked and watched his companion with cynical, yet hopeful, eyes.

"Of course you're a fool. Your head is filled with impossible fantasies. Have you ever considered that love is _not_ the answer? That it won't go smoothly? What if the one you entrusted yourself to failed . . . ? What then, worm?"

"I don't have to worry, about that . . . since . . ." Fayt took a deep breath and faced Albel head on one final time. "The person I trust the most could never fail me." The boy spoke with absolute, unwavering confidence in a voice that was both firm, and gentle. Imploring Albel with this utmost declaration of trust which was something no one else had ever said to him. Fayt believed in _him,_ above all others. Not only that, but Fayt knew him well enough to avoid using the concept of love against him. Love alone was not enough to base a relationship on, and Fayt was well aware of this fact. Trust, on the other hand, was so inclusive that it enveloped and expanded upon love, creating something not even the coldest heart could ignore . . . or resist.

The implication of those words was clear, and upon hearing them, Albel's heart seized with a terrifying realization. He wanted Fayt now, more than ever before, and this newfound desire revitalized his long dead emotions. The desire to attain Fayt, and to experience everything the boy could offer him, both physical and emotional was difficult for him to repress. The rebirth of all the emotions he had carefully stifled over the course of many years was overpowering, and more than a little confusing.

Though it was difficult to admit to himself, and would probably be impossible to admit to anyone else, Albel knew that he cared for Fayt, in so many ways it felt like the core of his being was being addled and warped into something different. It was not a complete change, but rather a reanimation of that which was hidden.

His eventual happiness was now dependant on having Fayt with him, and feeling the trust and stability of another person. But did all of his feelings, positive as they were, amount to love? If they did, Albel still wasn't ready for it, and he would do anything to keep that emotion at bay.

ooooo

It was already dark when they returned to Kirlsa later that evening, and by that point, Albel had become thoroughly disgusted with himself, and his desires. With few options available to him, he did what anyone else would have done about it. The first thing Albel did when he reached the town, and after accompanying Fayt to the Storm Brigade headquarters, was head to the tavern, intending to drink away his emotional confusion and replace it with numbness brought on by the powers of alcohol.

Before he could start to have second thoughts, Albel strode into the local establishment and made his way quickly to the bar. His eyes were fixed on the older man behind the counter who seemed to shrink into himself under the strain of Albel's glare. The man looked around hopefully for someone else who might take the order but the rest of the staff had hit the floor already and shook their heads with a resounding, "no chance in Hell," when his eyes travelled down and entreated his workers. With no other choice, the stout barkeep braced himself for Albel's order as the imposing man sidled up to the bar and slammed his clawed hand down on the counter, demanding service.

The barkeep was shaking now and a new warm sensation down the side of his leg indicated that he had soiled himself. Albel's claws dug menacingly into the bar, splintering the wood into little pieces, and he bared his teeth to grin at his audience of one. In the calmest voice he was possible of producing, Albel asked the barkeep quietly, "what's the strongest drink you have?"

The small man quivered uncontrollably. Even Albel's nicest voice was entirely too frightening for the average person since it came out as more of a raspy growl deep in his throat. Gathering his courage, the barkeep answered confidently as experience took over. "Why that would be our Kirlsa Special, made from seventeen of out finest liquors as well as some other secret ingredients which I can't mention."

These ingredients, which comprised the "special" part of the Kirlsa Special, were basic pharmaceuticals and lum tranquillizers, as well as some hallucinogenic narcotics thrown in for good measure. The tavern owners maintained that what you don't know won't kill you and no one had ever complained, mainly because few had survived the awesome power of the Kirlsa Special, and those who had were so traumatized by the experience that they spent the rest of their natural lives in a persistent vegetative state where drool constituted the only reliable means of communication.

Unaware of this, Albel smiled sinisterly and gave the man a satisfied nod. "Give me ten to start and keep them coming."

Normally the barkeep would never question the sanity of a customer, or even try to dissuade them from what he believed was their own business, but during his brief encounter with Albel Nox, he did both. "Um, excuse me sir, but are you certain? When I said it was strong, I meant it. I doubt that even one such as you could handle any more than two, and even then . . . " Realizing that he had said too much the little man cringed and awaited his punishment.

He squirmed ineffectively as Albel's fingers wrapped around his throat. Tightening his grasp, Albel hauled the man off of the floor and gave him a deadpan look as if he was the most insignificant speck of flesh and bone that Albel had ever laid eyes on.

"Do you value your life, worm?"

The barkeep nodded frantically, eyes wild with fear.

"Then do as I say, or else."

"As you wish sir, right away Lord Albel. Half price just for you!" Albel's fingers closed further cutting off the flow of air and his victim's eyes bulged. "Did I say half price?" he wheezed, "I meant no charge." Albel sighed and released the man who promptly fell to the ground. Scrambling to regain his composure, the barkeep clamoured to his feet and hurried away to prepare Albel's order.

"Please take a seat," he called over his shoulder, "I will bring the drinks to your table as soon as they are ready!" The man glared at Albel's back as the swordsman retreated to sit down. Charge, or no charge. It didn't matter. After consuming this much alcohol, Albel would be dead in no time. Then the wretched little man would be able to loot his corpse before dragging him into the back room to use the body for their brand new, experimental, honey flavoured soylent lager.

With a smug smile planted firmly on his face, Albel made his way to a free table in a darkened corner of the tavern. _Maybe I haven't lost my edge after all_ . . . Albel thought to himself happily as he sat down. Moments later the beady-eyed barkeep arrived with a tray full of glasses, each one containing a dubious, murky brown liquid which foamed quietly.

Grabbing the closest one, Albel opened his mouth and downed it effortlessly. He could feel it tingle as it slid down his throat and immediately Albel's mind drifted to the unwholesome thoughts about what part of Fayt he would rather be swallowing . . . Feeling the colour rise to his cheeks, Albel immediately groped for another glass, and then another before his head finally cleared.

Several minutes later the effects of his impatient drinking started to kick in. His vision blurred and Albel imagined that Fayt was sitting across from him, smirking. "Go away," he muttered irritably.

"Now why would I do that?" the hallucination answered. "Don't you want me around anymore Albel?" it pouted as its eyes grew large as saucers.

"You're not real," he reasoned.

"Oh, you're right," it said, sounding surprised, and promptly vanished in a puff of imaginary smoke.

Reaching for yet another glass, Albel was surprised to see that he was trembling and his movements were slow and uncoordinated. _Wonderful_, he thought, _it's finally working_. If he was lucky, the booze would kill the brain cells which were responsible for his unwanted obsession with that damned . . . near irresistible, oh so adorable, soft, warm, gentle, infinitely huggable . . .

"Oh bloody Hell," Albel cursed loudly to no one in particular. He could see Fayt in his mind's eye, taunting him, piercing his soul with those _beautiful emerald eyes . . ._

Albel shook his head furiously to dissolve the image. "Get out of my head!"

Several of the bar's patrons look around in confusion, darting worried glances first at the Black Brigade captain and then at each other.

"What're you maggotss slooking at?" Albel slurred drunkenly. Removing the Crimson Scourge from its sheath, he began to wave it threateningly, gesturing to his audience. "I'll kill every last one of you eventually, but first I need another drink . . ." Gazing at his table, Albel discovered that all the glasses were empty.

"Maggot!" he roared, "Gimme anudder drink!"

There was a stunned silence as the barkeep dealt with the shocking realization that Albel was still conscious and able to pronounce his words so well. Not one to tempt fate, the man yelled back from behind the protective counter. "Not a chance! Consider yourself cut off. You'll thank me in the morning." Then his voice lowered so that only his employees could hear, "if he lives that long . . ."

Rising to his feet, Albel swiftly crossed the room, slitting the barkeep's throat with his sword as he passed, and helped himself to all the bottles behind the counter.

At least this is what he would have done if he hadn't tripped over his own feet the moment he had tried to take a step forward. His head connected with the hard tavern floor and Albel saw an ocean of stars drifting lazily in front of his eyes before his world went black.

The tavern owner sighed heavily before he crossed the room to where Albel had fallen. Grabbing a broom, he prodded the swordsman's limp body first once, then twice, before giving him a swift, sound kick in the side just to make sure he was really out cold. Once he was certain it was safe, the man hooked his arms around Albel's and dragged him out into the street a safe distance away from the building. Nothing frightened away potential customers faster than having drunks passed out on your doorstep.

ooooo

After several hours of alcohol induced dreams, most of which involving various scenarios of Fayt in compromising positions, Albel awoke. Wiping the drool from his chin, he staggered off, hopefully in the direction of the Storm Brigade mansion. Eventually he made it to the right door and stumbled into the expansive living room to the relief of Fayt who had been waiting up patiently for the other man to return.

"Where have you been?" a worried Fayt asked.

"None of your damn business. I don't have to answer to you!" Albel snapped, wobbling slightly as he did so.

Fayt hurried to Albel's side, and steadied the other man who was beginning to stumble forward, but he was immediately pushed away. "Get your stinking paws off me you damned, dirty, Fayt."

"Albel! You're drunk aren't you?" Fayt frowned slightly, but he persisted in his endeavour, and moved closer.

"I'm warning you, Fayt. Don't come near me. I don't need anyone's help, especially not yours," Albel hissed, his voice seething with pent up rage.

"But why not?"

"Because I _hate_ you!"

"You don't mean that, Albel!" Fayt rejoined, but after seeing the dull loathing smoldering in Albel's eyes he almost lost his resolve. _Albel . . . What happened?_

"The hell I don't! I hate you Fayt, and I just want you to leave me alone for once." Albel could feel his body raging, and it wasn't just the effect of alcohol. His head was pounding and his heart throbbed against his words, but it was too late to rescind them, and at the moment he truly had no desire to do so. Suddenly, Albel felt the bitter taste of bile in the back of his throat. "Oh gods," he blurted, before making a beeline for the washroom.

From where he stood in the living room, Fayt could hear Albel vomiting. He was tempted to let his ornery companion suffer, but that really wasn't his style. Albel's words had hurt him, but what kind of person would he be if he let one emotional outburst come between them? Slowly he made his way to the washroom and opened the door. The stench was overpowering, and Fayt was hit with a wave of nausea. The smell was like a horrible mix of booze and rotting meat, and Fayt almost turned around to leave, but in the end pity got the better of him.

"Need any help, Albel?" he offered casually. No matter what had happened, he just couldn't feel any animosity toward the man. Albel had been brought to his knees, literally, and it was no one's fault but his own, leaving Fayt to wonder just what could have shaken the older man to such an extent. Albel was usually faultlessly composed, aside from the usual thoughtless outbursts and insults, so seeing him in such a weakened state was actually quite painful for Fayt to witness.

"You again? Just go away. I told you to leave me alone!"

"Where would I go?" Fayt questioned softly, well aware that there were few options for him if Albel meant what he said.

"I don't care," Albel spat, before vomiting once again. "Worm," he muttered when the moment had passed.

"You're acting like this is my fault! If I did something to upset you just tell me, and I'll make it up to you." Albel remained silent, offering neither confirmation, nor denial and Fayt reached his tolerance threshold.

"Fine!" Turning on his heel, Fayt stalked toward the door, but when he heard Albel retch and start vomiting once again, groaning in between the bouts of nausea, he stopped. Against the other man's wishes, Fayt quickly went to Albel's side and knelt down until he was at eye level with him. Grasping a handful of dark hair, he lifted Albel's head up and forced the ill man to look him in the eye.

"You're a mess," he said flatly.

It was the truth after all. Albel's eyes were even redder than usual, the whites were bloodshot, and Fayt noticed dark purple bags underneath which was evidence that Albel had not been sleeping well. The nights he had stayed up guarding Fayt in the mountains, as well as the nightmares, and the emotional conflict had all kept him from resting like he should have done. Pale brown bile trickled down his chin, and Fayt fought the urge to kiss it off of him. Instead, he reached for a fluffy hand towel and softly wiped Albel's face until he was clean. Albel glared at him, but made no effort to stop Fayt as the boy brushed the hair from his eyes and gently stroked his head like a child.

"I think you need a bib Albel, " Fayt chuckled kindly with no hint of malice.

Albel's eyes narrowed and he glowered through sweat drenched bangs at the boy who held him, too weak to resist. "Damn you, Fayt . . . "

"Say what you will to me Albel, but I'm not leaving you and that's final! What kind of friend would I be, if I left you in this state? A really bad one I'd say. It would be cruel to leave anyone when they are sick. You look terrible, but I'll get you cleaned up soon enough. It's not a crime to rely on others for help, or to admit when you are not feeling well. I'll always be here for you Albel, even if you hate me for it."

Albel's mind started to drift as Fayt spoke to him, and his body was responding well to his companion's gentle touch. It was hard to stay angry at someone when they refused to play along. _He's being much too kind, especially after how I treated him, _Albel thought dismally. He turned slightly and looked into Fayt's eyes hoping to see even a hint of anger, but he found no trace of resentment lurking in their endless depths. Did Fayt mean what he said about refusing to leave him? It was too much for his weary brain to digest.

". . . Tch, you even got some in your hair . . ."

Fayt was beginning to ramble and his calming voice had a melodic quality Albel had never noticed before which was making him drowsy. That same voice was comforting to him, familiar even, and Albel couldn't imagine what his life would be like without it . . . without Fayt by his side. He started to close his eyes, concentrating not on the words, just Fayt's tone but was interrupted by the now familiar burning sensation deep in his throat. Wrenching himself away from Fayt's grasp he leaned over the toilet and emptied the contents of his stomach once again, but this time Fayt held the hair away from his face. There was no sense in making things any worse than they already were.

The successive purging of his stomach was taking its toll, and Albel's body was weakening under the stress of the unfamiliar exertion. He wouldn't be able to stave off unconsciousness for much longer. Using his last remaining bit of strength, Albel raised his head to look at Fayt again, this time of his own volition. _He's beautiful . . . What the hell does he want with someone like me? _Albel thought bitterly.

For years, Albel had been blinded by his faults, and he could not see that Fayt found his character traits both endearing and challenging. His hesitant nature, cold indifference, and distrust of people begged to be endured, and Fayt was beyond patient with him. Even when all others would have given up and left him to his own devices Fayt would not.

When his vision started to blur and Fayt's face became a fuzzy blue and pink blob, Albel shut his eyes at last. Unable to hold his head up any longer he leaned his body gently toward Fayt and rested his aching head against the boy's welcoming chest. The motion of Fayt's breathing, and the beating of his heart lulled the tired warrior into a state of relaxation. Albel welcomed the pleasant warmth which was overtaking him as he pressed closer to Fayt, seeking contact with the one he had developed such strong feelings for. Whether it was love, or something else, the fact of the matter was that he was coming very close to happiness.

Fayt's voice was like a distant whisper when he finally spoke. "Sleep now, Albel. You need your rest. Just leave everything to me, alright?"

"Mmn," he muttered in affirmation as he snuggled closer, stealing a moment of peace for himself under the guise of absolute exhaustion.

As darkness caressed him once again with its velvet touch for the second time that evening, Albel made a final effort to sort out his thoughts and feelings before drifting off to sleep. _I don't deserve him, and I hate . . . myself . . . for that._

But right now, with Fayt's arms closing around him, Albel could not imagine any place he'd rather be, or anyone else he would rather be with. He wanted this, more than anything else, and that night he realized that it wasn't hatred he felt. It could only be love. There was no escape for him any longer. He only hoped that Fayt would understand why he could never voice his happiness.

ooooo

**A/N:** Gah, was that lovey-dovey mushy or what? I've been feeling out of sorts lately and I guess this is what happens . . . I needed some snuggling to cheer me up. So what's going to happen next? Will they kiss and make up? Will Fayt decide that Albel's just not worth the effort and leave for good only to have his ship explode due to a mechanical malfunction as he leaves Elicoor? Or will Fayt give in to temptation and happily molest the unconscious Wicked One? I know what _I'd _do . . . -cough- Er . . . Review?


	12. Breaking Point

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 12:** Breaking Point

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean.

**A/N:** Good God, this chapter took forever, and what's worse is that I can't blame it on school any longer...so now I blame work. Being busy everyday means there's little time for writing or typing, but I will do what I can to update in less than a month. Sound good? Anyways, my apologies:( I'm also sad to say that there is only a little inappropriate touching in this chapter for those of you who chose the "Molest Albel" option from last time, so don't get your pervy hopes up. XD

And thanks once again to everyone who's reviewed this thing. You're all great! I really love hearing your thoughts and it's just that little bit of thoughtful kindness that keeps me going:)

ooooo

It was a scene few could have imagined, and no one would ever see except the two participants. It was late, and there was little chance that anyone would disturb Fayt and his wicked charge which meant that the moment could be used for reflective thought and a little one-sided banter without the fear of being discovered.

"Albel, why does it have to be like this . . . ?" Fayt whispered softly to himself, clutching tightly to the older man. "If the damage is deeper than even I can reach . . . "

Fayt bowed slightly and rubbed his cheek against Albel's damp hair, humming softly in an effort to soothe them both, knowing full well that Albel was too far gone to hear him. If the only time Albel let his guard down was when his body failed him, would this be the closest he ever got?

Trembling fingers lifted and turned the face of the sleeping man upward so Fayt could look upon him, and what he saw warmed his heart.

Albel was smiling.

His expression was faint, but unmistakable. It was the same smile Fayt had seen only a handful of times before. Like the rarest gem anyone could hope to achieve, it was invaluable. Fayt burned the image into his memory. It was a moment he didn't want to forget.

The moment wasn't perfect, but opportunity was knocking with all its strength in an effort to convince him that it was. Temptation overcame dutiful restraint, and prodded the usually proper Earthling into something he could never have imagined. Realizing that it might be his only chance, Fayt cupped Albel's face in his hands. Before his resolve could be shaken by his nagging conscience which was trying to warn him that it was the wrong time and place, he did something no one would have ever expected of the infamous Fayt Leingod.

Driven by unquenchable desire, Fayt closed his eyes, and lowered his lips to meet those of his unrequited love. Above all things, he was tender and non-invasive, which allowed him to retain at least some semblance of pride by refusing to give in completely to unforgiving lust. For all he knew, it would be the only kiss he would ever share with the Glyphian. Except that it wasn't shared at all.

It should have pleased him to finally have the contact he craved, but as he parted, and Albel slumped against him once again, all Fayt could feel was overwhelming disappointment and shame. He had taken something precious without consent all because he couldn't resist the urges any longer. How could Albel make him lose his self-control in such a way?

If only the scene had come about legitimately. At that moment, Fayt would have given anything to hold Albel when the man was fully aware of him. But what were the chances that the stubborn warrior would ever allow something similar to happen when he was awake? Albel's mannerisms had been ingrained over so many years, it was hopeless to assume that he could work past that and give Fayt the type of companionship he needed.

_Irreparable damage. It's beyond me. I can't comfort him if he won't let me, or if he doesn't want me to. He doesn't want me around anymore. I guess it's true . . . Maybe this is as far as we go._ The burning sting of tears came without warning, and Fayt fought back the choked sob which was growing in his throat. This was no time to break down, after all. Tomorrow wasn't far off, but in order to reach it, he had to deal with the limp swordsman who still rested silently in his arms.

With a heavy heart, Fayt sighed and set to work. It was going to be a long night.

ooooo

The next morning, Albel awoke with a pounding headache. Everything hurt. His eyes were dry, and looking anywhere but straight ahead caused immediate sharp stinging pain. Even the sunlight which flooded his bedroom, signalling the start of another beautiful day, tormented him. Outside his window, birds sang cheerily in the warmth of the morning and their sweet voices made him cringe. Every chirp, cheep and twitter drilled through his skull to assault his sensitive brain and his head throbbed as wave after wave of pain washed over him.

Gritting his teeth against the pain, Albel turned his head around and surveyed the room. Instinct begged him to look for Fayt, who would most certainly be close by if he was in such bad shape. When his eyes came to rest upon the empty chair at his bedside, he finally accepted the fact that Fayt was not with him to make the pain bearable.

Crestfallen, Albel returned to his previous preoccupation of categorizing his pain while taking stock of his situation. Gazing down at his body, Albel saw that his armor had been removed, as well as his clawed gauntlet. _It must have been that fool's doing,_ he mused. The boy knew that in a drunken stupor Albel was liable to poke his eye out with that monstrosity.

Next, Albel ran his fingers through his hair and was pleased to see that it was no longer tangled and matted with vomit. Fayt must have cleaned it last night after he had passed out and before delivering Albel to his own bed. So after doing so much why had Fayt left him?

"Good morning Albel, I see you are finally awake."

Turning his head in the direction of the voice, Albel saw Woltar standing in the doorway. The old man was frowning at him but before he could ask why, Woltar shoved a cup of hot liquid into his hand.

"Drink this," he said softly. "It will clear your head and numb the pain."

Albel tentatively sniffed the proffered beverage. It was thick and brown, but it wasn't coffee . . . and the stench nearly made him pass out once again. Still reeling he asked, "it's not poison, is it?"

"Just drink it. If I say it will help you can trust me. I've lived much longer than you have after all."

Reluctantly, Albel downed the vile liquid, felt it slide slowly down his throat, and nearly gagged. It had the consistency of hot tar and was not going down smoothly. Instead it lingered as if taunting him with its presence. Seeing his distress, Woltar bustled off and returned quickly with a cup of water which would force the medicine down.

As disgusting as it was, Albel had to admit that he felt somewhat better after drinking it. His head had ceased to ache, and he was finally able the think clearly. But with a clear mind came memories of last night, and he immediately felt ashamed of his behaviour toward Fayt.

"Having some regrets, Albel?"

Albel ignored him and quickly asked the question which worried him the most, "Where is Fayt?"

"He left the room earlier this morning and seemed to be in a hurry to leave before you awoke. Now that I think about it, he didn't seem to be his usual cheerful self. It was as if a shadow had clouded his countenance. What happened between the two of you last night? Did you do something to him, Albel?"

Reluctantly, Albel nodded but he did not offer any further information, so Woltar continued his interrogation. "What could you possibly have done last night that would strip the smile from his face?"

Albel smiled sadly and looked at Woltar, eyes filled with regret. "I said that I hated him . . . "

"How terribly cruel of you . . . The poor boy, and after everything he's done for you." Woltar was shaking his head in disbelief. "Did you mean it?"

"Of course not . . . I had been drinking and wasn't thinking straight. I could never hate him and that's why I desperately wanted to. I don't want to care about anyone because it makes you weak and I don't need anyone to care about me. My father cared for me, and look what happened to him! I wish we had never met, then things would not have become so damn complicated."

"Albel," Woltar's voice was kind but serious. "Do you love him?"

"Love him! Your getting senile old man, I don't love anyone." Albel was adamant in his denial even though he knew it was a lie. His discovery was still new, and he only had a fragile acceptance of something he had tried so hard to dismiss. _Can I love him?_ Albel wondered suddenly. His brain was screaming no, but his heart beat faster at the possibility.

"Bah, I've had enough of this. I'm leaving."

A stood up dizzily and walked over to the small table to recover his gauntlet. Once it had been reattached, Albel stalked out of the room and headed out of the mansion. He had only one mission as he entered the town, and that was to find Fayt.

ooooo

After much impatient searching, Albel was rewarded for his efforts, spotting Fayt near the entrance to the Kirlsa Caverns. The boy was standing with his back toward Albel, absently gazing up into the sky with longing. There was a whole universe beyond the small town, and Fayt was wondering if that was where he belonged.

Albel watched him silently from a distance, mystified by his body's reactions to the sight of the younger man, catching his breath more than once as he stared, completely transfixed by the scene before him.

Dressed down for the day, Fayt had cast off the usual battle gear and was clothed in his simple pair of black pants and a lightweight, almost flimsy looking vest. The loose fitting attire had the unwelcome, yet mesmerizing effect of twisting and billowing in the morning's gentle breeze, obscuring any definite shape or form so that the boy's slight figure was rather elusive even to Albel's keen eyes. Still, Albel did have somewhat intimate knowledge of Fayt's true appearance, and only a fool would miss the brief moments where fabric met flesh to create a visible outline.

Albel couldn't help but smile quietly to himself. Fayt's clothing was rather becoming, flattering even, especially when compared to the clumsy armor. _Although no clothing would be best._ The low-cut vest actually accentuated Fayt's slender neck, hinting at the gracefully sloping shoulders, and delicate muscular build. It was true that Fayt was strong for his age, but his body had yet to reach its full potential. _I wonder what he'll look like in five years . . . and will I still be around to see how much he's changed . . . _

Albel shifted his stance uncomfortably as butterflies fluttered in his stomach and beat themselves to death against its walls. Only then was he able to approach the boy. "Fayt?" he called, addressing the boy by his given name in the hopes that it would make things easier, but there was no answer, and Fayt's back remained turned toward him. _Is the maggot ignoring me on purpose?_ With growing unease, Albel tried again.

"Fayt!" The desperation in his voice was hidden by the tone of authority. It was not a plea but an order.

After a short pause, Fayt turned around to greet him as if he had just noticed the other man was there. "Good morning Albel! How are you feeling?" he asked quietly, well aware of Albel's probable pounding headache.

Everything seemed normal, but Albel could see that Fayt's cheerful smile was forced, and his tear stained cheeks and red eyes were ample proof that Fayt had been crying. _Crying over me . . _. Albel thought with a stab of guilt. It could have been a good sign, because it was proof of Fayt's feelings for him but it was also clear that Albel had hurt those feelings. Albel awoke from his revery to find that Fayt was staring at him intently, his face showing nothing more than friendly concern as he waited patiently for a response.

"Albel?"

"I'm feeling better, thank you . . ."

Fayt seemed unconvinced, and his eyes narrowed suspiciously. "You don't look that good . . . your eyes especially seem very distant, as if your mind isn't paying attention. I think it would be best if you took the day off. We both deserve a rest after everything that's happened lately."

Fayt looked at him again, kinder this time, signalling to Albel that he was willing to forgive and forget without mentioning their altercation ever again. Albel, on the other hand, was not prepared to leave something like that looming over their relationship just to continue on as if nothing had happened when it was obvious something had. He had to clear his conscience, and make things right again or else the guilt would plague him forever.

"Come on Albel, let's go back. I'm sure Woltar will be worried by now," Fayt said cheerily as he glided past, beckoning the other man to follow.

Before Fayt could get too far, cold steel claws reached out and clamped down upon his arm. It wasn't hard enough to cut him deeply, but Albel had used enough pressure to break the skin. Bleeding, Fayt stopped dead in his tracks. "What are you doing? That hurts!"

Albel turned around and faced the bewildered Fayt who, at the moment, could not escape him. At first he was able to look Fayt in the eye, intent on what he needed to say and knowing that it had to be done with sincerity, but at the last moment his resolve wavered. Floundering in grief and confusion, Albel lowered his head as he spoke.

"I don't hate you, fool." The words caught in his throat but he still managed to force them out. Albel didn't know what to expect, but he knew that the uncomfortable silence which followed his confession was not a good sign.

"I don't believe you," Fayt said simply, pain clear in his voice as his face twisted into a hardened mask which Albel couldn't read. _I have a feeling you don't even believe yourself. _

"What?" he croaked in disbelief. He had assumed that Fayt was only capable of mercy and forgiveness, but apparently, he was wrong.

Fayt's eyes were cold, a glassy, impenetrable wall devoid of emotion, and when Albel hazarded a glance into those same cool green eyes his heart ached with regret. It was his fault. He had done this to Fayt and the boy's infinite kindness had been shaken to the core.

"I told you I didn't mean it, maggot!"

"Yeah, I'm just a maggot to you," Fayt shot back. _I'm almost sick of trying . . . I've been too kind. It's time he learned that I'm not a pushover._ "But I'm not maggot, or an idiot, for that matter." _Maybe a fool . . ._ "Alcohol lowers a person's inhibitions and allows them to act without considering the consequences. It's like truth serum, Albel. It makes you say exactly what you feel in your heart. So instead of denying your obvious hatred for me, why don't you tell me what it is about me that you hate?"

Still in shock over Fayt's unexpected reaction, Albel remained silent, a look of pure horror slowly creeping over his previously calm expression. It was finally coming to the end he had dreaded. Fayt's inevitable rejection of him, and the biggest loss of his life. But the longer he kept quiet, the more desperate Fayt was becoming in his quest for an answer, seeking anything which would guide him toward action. To leave or stay, it could go either way depending on how Albel responded.

In the wake of Albel's speechlessness, Fayt continued his rant in a voice which was deathly quiet and composed. "Just what have I done to you Albel?" he asked softly. "I've been kind, helpful, considerate. When you were wounded, I took care of you. When we're in a battle, I watch your back, hoping against hope that maybe you're doing the same for me."

The young man's chest heaved under the strain of trying to hold his emotions back, though internally he was seething with controlled rage. It was pure pain, heartbreak even, that fueled his next words. A confession of sorts, followed by intense disappointment. "I cared about you Albel, and I was dumb enough to think that you might care a little bit for me too. After everything we've been through, there were times where I almost thought that I might mean something to you, but that's obviously not the case. All I have ever wanted was to earn your trust, but what did I get in return for my efforts? Nothing but degradation and scorn. So, please, just tell me. What have I done wrong? I've taken your insults, and your backhanded compliments. I've withstood everything because I thought that deep down, you didn't know any better." _But I can only take so much . . ._

Fayt shook his head, clearly struggling with his feelings and fighting hard against his despair, but this time he just couldn't hold it back. "Then to say that you hate me . . . Damn it Albel, that _hurt!_ I tried to ignore it, and I knew you didn't mean it, but then I started to doubt myself. You may hide your feelings, but you're not a liar. So be honest with me, and I mean brutally honest, and tell me exactly how you feel."

Fayt paused for a moment and took the time to breath deeply. "Do you hate me?" he asked, not even bothering to disguise the hurt in his voice. Fayt had been brooding about it, but he would remain calm, no matter what the answer was.

Surprised, Albel needed time to think. "What kind of question is that?" he demanded, making a mental note of how familiar those words were.

"Please Albel, I need to know how you feel about me."

Albel looked at him then, really looked at the boy who had been by his side for what seemed like ages, and he finally knew that the feelings they had for each other were genuine, but it was too late. _I'm in love with him, and he loved me, but I've ruined everything. He won't want me now, not after this . . . _

Albel's eyes became dull with resignation, and not just to the truth. Within that hopeless gaze was the knowledge that he would always be alone because it was in his nature to lash out at those he cared for the most. And he realized then that he was most likely beyond help. Even Fayt couldn't last. With Fayt, he had come close to happiness, but he had taken the boy's kindness for granted. He had always expected it as a matter of course while doing nothing to nourish it, and in time it had withered away.

Immersed as he had been in his own misery and struggle, he had forgotten that Fayt was not without his own problems. The boy had feelings too, and Albel had abused them. Forever stubborn, Fayt had absorbed more than his share of Albel's misdirected suffering and anger which stemmed from the underlying hatred of himself, and his general disgust with humanity. _He needed me, as much as I needed him. I knew it, but I refused to care. I pushed him away first, and I pushed him too far. So now he's finally given up . . ._ Realizing that it had been _his_ mistake, the least Albel could do, was give him an explanation. Fayt deserved that much, at the very least.

Relaxing his grip on Fayt's arm, Albel surrendered to honesty. "I hate you, Fayt." _Because hatred is all I've ever known. It was the only thing I could trust aside from my own strength, and when that failed me . . . It's strange, but at least hatred is safe and predictable._

Fayt sighed, and nodded. "I understand," he replied softly, not trusting his voice to anything louder than a whisper. "Goodbye, Albel." Fayt pulled his arm out of Albel's weak grip and turned to leave, but before he could go anywhere, the older man spoke again.

"I hate you because you're getting too close," Albel said angrily, as if he was disgusted with himself for it. Would Fayt understand that the security he found in emotions such as hatred and anger was hard to give up? Would Fayt's love ever truly change that part of him?

_What? Don't tell me he's afraid of how close we've gotten._ Hearing the restrained sadness in the swordsman's normally confident voice, Fayt quickly turned around to face the one he loved once again. Albel tried to hold everything in, just as he always had, but once he had started, the words flowed from him without any fear of consequences. "I hate the way you look at me. I hate it when you coddle me. I hate you because you have power over me. I hate you because you force me to feel something I've always avoided, to want the things I had convinced myself were worthless, and to need the support of someone other than myself. You've made me weak, and I hate you for that. But most of all . . . "

Albel raised his head and looked into Fayt's eyes with hopeless longing and growled in frustration. "I hate you because I can't make you mine. No matter what I've said in the past, I have no real claim on you. You don't belong to me, but I want you to." _I hate you because you love me, and I couldn't stop myself from loving you back. I need you . . . and I can't stand it._

"So I'll always be a possession Albel?" Fayt asked sadly. "Nothing more? That's the best you can offer me. And I suppose you will protect me as well, as one would guard a piece of property from thieves. No one can be allowed to damage me because your pride would be hurt. I think I preferred your hatred." _Unless . . . _

"I'm sorry." Albel muttered finally. And he truly was. For so many things. For everything he could never atone for.

"Albel?" Fayt observed the other man, concern welling up from within him, clearing the emotional fog which had clouded his vision. How could he have missed the signs? Albel had been struggling even more than usual lately to appear aloof and unaffected. Admitting to hatred was his last ace, and if Fayt could see through the ploy, the final bluff, than maybe . . . Albel would cease his efforts to keep them apart, and embrace what Fayt had always wanted to offer him.

True to form, Fayt easily understood everything once he put his mind to the task of deciphering Albel's behaviour. _He's hurting so much . . . I wonder if hate is the same as love to him? When you only feel one emotion it must be difficult to admit anything else. He hates me because he loves me and he doesn't want to. He can't admit it, so he hides behind the idea of ownership. I guess there's only one way to find out for sure . . . _

Moving closer, Fayt slid his arms around Albel's slender waist and hugged him tightly, not caring if his tender demonstration of affection was welcome or not.

"I forgive you," the blue-haired teen said calmly, without a trace of regret or subterfuge. And with those words, he banished all of his doubts. _I still love him, no matter what he says, or does because I'm the only one who can see through him . . . and I like what I see . . . everything . . ._

Taken aback by the sudden display of affection, Albel was slow to respond, but eventually, after what seemed like a lifetime of stunned inaction, he draped his good arm around Fayt's shoulders. It wasn't a bold declaration of love, just a friendly gesture of acceptance and comfort, but it was a start, and within it was the potential for more.

Albel pulled his arm back, and stroked Fayt's cheek gently with his free hand before tilting the boy's face up toward his own. Fayt's eyes sparkled sweetly with confusion at the gesture, but he did not pull away, so Albel took things a step farther.

Wrapping his metal arm around Fayt's waist, Albel forced him closer. The boy gasped lightly at the sudden movement, but he still didn't resist. Clutching Albel a little tighter, Fayt fought to steady himself. His heart fluttered momentarily and beat faster, as each strong palpitation sent warm blood coursing through every part of his body and Fayt flushed at the sudden tightening in his pants. While locked in such a close embrace, Albel could feel the younger man's arousal and he smiled at the unexpected turn of events.

Fayt's eyes were now locked with Albel's, and what he saw staring back at him from those ravenous crimson orbs was both frightening and alluring. Insatiable desire was written plainly on Albel's face. With red eyes gleaming fiercely, and his mouth parted to grin seductively, the Wicked One observed his captive.

Fayt was watching him expectantly, still unsure of Albel's motives. He licked his lips nervously, running a delicate tongue along dry pink lips to moisten them . . .

And Albel couldn't resist.

As if spotting his prey for the first time, Albel attacked and ravished Fayt's parted lips with his own. Fayt's tongue retreated hastily and fled to the safety of his welcoming mouth, but Albel pursued it, driving himself into Fayt before the boy could mount a defensive.

One tongue corralled the other, caressing it gently in an attempt to lure it into submission, and Fayt willingly complied without hesitation. With a soft moan he surrendered himself completely to Albel's coaxing.

_No resistance whatsoever?_ In fact, it was quite the opposite. Fayt was pressing forcefully against him, ensuring that Albel was rewarded handsomely for his spontaneity with the touch of a tentative, but definitely reciprocating tongue against his own.

Fayt's hands, still resting comfortably in the small of Albel's back, had started to tremble with anxious anticipation and need. He wanted more. With the same fluid grace he would have displayed in battle, Fayt shifted his position. His arms detached from Albel's waist, and lingered lightly, almost playfully on his slight hips for a moment, before he reached up and gently wrapped them around the Wicked One's neck.

Slightly trapped by the new position, Albel had no choice but to lower his head a bit, and he couldn't help himself from reacting to Fayt's touch with pent up sensuality as he felt the younger man's nimble fingers tickle the back of his neck, just above the ever present collar. The simple intimacy of that heartfelt caress left him trembling with desire for more contact with those hands, he wanted to feel them everywhere, allowing his body to compete fiercely for their attentions. How could he find such a minor expression of affection so arousing?

With a solid, guttural moan, he parted from the sumptuous spaces of Fayt's mouth and buried his face against the younger man's neck, nipping playfully at Fayt's lower jaw as he passed.

His left arm wasn't exactly useful for this type of close combat, but Albel had quickly made up for his deficiencies by using his right one. No longer needed to hold Fayt in place, it had long ago travelled lower. Albel was running his good hand slowly down the boy's firm, but supple body, groping leisurely as he went.

Upon reaching the point where Fayt's shirt and pants came together, Albel had chosen the high road, sliding his eager hand under the lip of his green-eyed partner's vest and making long awaited contact with the boy's smooth, hot skin.

With great pleasure he could feel each strong muscle spasm and twitch against him, craving his attentions with such desperation that it almost surprised him. As his hand moved higher, Fayt's body eagerly followed his touch. It shifted with him, pressing itself into his palm, begging him with the silent language of the body to do as he pleased.

Throughout Albel's attentions, Fayt was also busy, doing his best to show the older man just what he was capable off. As Albel's lips softened against his throat, pressing gently against and around his life flow of blood, Fayt's hands gripped the swordsman's hair tightly, nearly mad with unfulfilled desire.

With an intrepid nuzzle, Fayt burrowed his face further into Albel's thick, two-toned locks, kissing softly as he went. Upon finding an ear, long hidden from vision by the man's severe hairstyle, Fayt licked it delicately, drawing a strong tongue smoothly along the outer rim.

The action sent a subtle shudder through Albel's entire body, and the muffled groan which followed pleased Fayt immensely. He had never done this sort of thing with anyone before, but Albel was bringing out the best in him, or rather they were bringing out the best in each other. They were taking part in yet another friendly competition. It was the first, of hopefully many tests, to see who could bring the most pleasure and elicit the greater responses. Except that at the end of this battle, they would both be victorious.

Fayt's unrestrained, yet careful attention to Albel's needs was beginning to fill his partner with previously unthinkable thoughts. His mind was running rampant with enticing visions of Fayt, happily imagining every indecent thing the boy could do to him.

Under the seductive touch of his young companion, Albel relaxed completely as Fayt's hands teased and threaded through his rich hair while he continued his assault on the boy's lower neck. He didn't even bother objecting against the motions that were leaving his pied tresses in tousled shambles, and he could almost sense that Fayt's impromptu makeover was swiftly giving him the appearance of an unkempt tavern wench, but it wasn't as if he gave a damn about that _now_.

In an unexpected twist, Fayt grew too eager and took charge of the situation, using one free hand to grip Albel's lengthy hair and reposition the man's head so that they were face to face. Once in position, he forcibly brought their lips together once again. Fayt leaned into the kiss and tried to take control away from the elder man, struggling in an attempt to force his way into Albel's mouth, but he should have known it would end in failure.

Albel grunted in surprise, thoroughly caught off guard, though not just by Fayt's sudden aggression. It was the enjoyment he gained from Fayt's uncharacteristically fierce actions that confused him the most. Albel had always believed that he would be dominant one by default, but when faced with a hefty, and admittedly thrilling challenge to his seemingly implicit role, he nearly gave it all away.

A sudden urge to experiment had left him wondering if Fayt actually had what it took to take the lead, but in the end his stubborn pride interfered, and prompted Albel to pull away before Fayt could overwhelm him. The abrupt sundering had the ignoble result of leaving his partner both breathless, and needy.

_It's done. I can't take it back, and I don't think I want to._ Fayt thought with determination.

Ever the optimist, Albel was also considering his options. _If it doesn't work out, I can always kill him . . . _

For a little while, they just held each other. Fayt was flushed and frazzled at the sudden intimacy, and when he glanced at his partner, the boy smiled upon seeing that Albel wasn't much better. The Glyphian's complexion was not nearly as pale as usual, tinted as it was with a touch of red. Albel's breathing was slightly ragged, and he stared at the boy in his arms in disbelief.

Crimson eyes were swirling magically with so many thoughts and feelings, that even Fayt couldn't see what was truly going through the older man's mind. The wicked warrior couldn't seem to pick an emotion, and that fact was slightly disturbing to his young companion

"Albel . . . is this really what you want?" Fayt asked quietly after they had separated. Albel had pulled away from their kiss first. Did that mean he felt it was a mistake?

Still holding Fayt close, Albel considered the question. He knew that giving the correct response would be vital to what happened next, so he tried to take his time with constructing an answer. There were so many things which he had to take into account, but at the moment he was overwhelmed with too many emotions and sensations to think straight.

Having Fayt close to him, knowing that their lives had become entwined, that innumerable events had bound them to each other merely because there was no one else suitable to cling to was just so damned monumental in his mind. He had never put any faith in the gods, or the twisted occurrences of Chance which some would have labeled Fate. But if his entire life had seemed been leading to this moment, what else could it have been?

His childhood failure had left him emotionally traumatized, and his somewhat damaged psyche had led to his transformation from Glou Nox's upstart son into the feared and respected figurehead, Albel the Wicked. Driven by the need to prove himself, Albel had gone to great lengths to become strong, and when he had met Fayt, the boy had readily recognized and accepted that aspect of his personality. But it was another aspect of his character which had truly interested his blue-haired comrade.

The conflict with their Creator, had called for greater strength on his part, and his quest for power had guided him back to his father's heirloom sword, the Crimson Scourge. In that test, he had been force to admit his weakness to himself, which was something he had failed to do nine years prior . . .

And Fayt had been there to witness it all.

The others could have come, but only one person in their party had bothered seeking him out. Back then it had shamed him, and he held it against the younger man for a little while, but with time his minor grudge had weakened. Fayt had seen in him what others could not, including the similarities in their characters, and their situations. It was this last thought which brought Albel back to another memory.

He could still remember Fayt's words when they had reunited after Luther's defeat. _"Let's go back to where we belong," _the Earthling had said, so casually that one wouldn't have realized that the boy didn't belong anywhere any longer, nor did he have a welcoming home to return to.

Fayt had seemed to be looking right at him as he spoke, and Albel had felt the necessity to mumble a halfhearted, _"I guess,"_ as if he really didn't have a choice in the matter. Back then, he had scoffed at the notion. Ever the realist, Albel had seen the flaws in the boy leader's words. Fayt had no home, and Albel had nothing else to do but return to the same boring world he had left. What good was one swordsman from a backwards planet to these people who travelled through the skies at will, boasting weapons of unparalleled power. He had nothing to offer any of them, least of all Fayt. That was something he truly believed at the time. So they both took separate paths, each young man searching for something meaningful which would bring them renewed stability in a potentially chaotic future.

Somehow though, they had found each other yet again. Despite everything that had happened, and all the factors working for and against them, Albel was holding Fayt in his arms. Together, they were building the home that each of them had been lacking by carefully picking up the pieces of their shattered lives in order to make a new start.

The warmth of another against his body was refreshingly unfamiliar to him. The inexplicably wonderful feeling of Fayt's heart beating strongly against his own chest was a welcome sensation, knowing it did so for him. For a man who was associated so strongly with death, it amused him to think that the heart of Destruction could belong to him if he chose. Still, Albel could not bring himself to speak.

Silence weighed them down, and crushed the flimsy hope Fayt had allowed to once again grow in his heart. _It's too sudden. He won't be able to think clearly . . . After living alone for so long . . . he doesn't know anything else. I'll save him the trouble . . . _

"It's alright, Albel. You don't have to answer that." Fayt shook his head, feeling quite the fool, as if he had finally earned what used to be a misnomer. "I shouldn't have asked . . . "

Regretfully, the young man backed away, his own heart sinking as the distance between them widened into something which should have been more comfortable, though all he really felt as they broke apart was an intense need to close the gap once again.

Albel, too, was longing for a renewal of that contact, the shared warmth, the comforting presence of Fayt which showed him he wasn't alone in the world any longer. It felt too good to allow it to slip away because of a misunderstanding, so Albel asked a question, even though he was dreading the answer.

"Are you serious? About me?"

"Of course I am, do you still doubt me? I want to be with you, but . . ." Fayt sighed heavily and crossed his arms, knowing full well that everything would not be reconciled so easily. "I think it might still be too soon to make such a decision. Didn't you say that emotions affect your judgement?" Fayt lowered his eyes and smiled a little to himself. "Come to think of it, my presence is probably enough to throw you off, isn't it?"

"What are you talking about, fool?" Albel felt his body tense involuntarily with growing apprehension. The things the boy was saying . . . they didn't bode well for the wicked swordsman and he was sharp enough to realize this fact even before Fayt made his intentions known.

As for Fayt, his decision really didn't make sense. He could have everything he wanted. Albel would be his, willingly it seemed, but still, Fayt was cautious. In mere moments he would give it all up in the hopes that something deeper would form in its place.

"I don't want to start something if you're unsure, so I think it would be best if we separated for a bit."

"You're leaving . . . ?"

Fayt nodded slowly, frowning ever so slightly, his brow furrowed in deep concentration. "Just for a little while. It's necessary, I think. As long as I'm here, I'm only a distraction. Come to Peterny in two weeks. I had been arranging a reunion of sorts with everyone so we would have been going there anyway. Well, at least _I_ would have."

"But how did you–?"

Fayt smiled at his small victory. He had actually put something past the ever vigilant warrior. "I did it through late night communications. We had separate rooms after all, so it wasn't difficult." _Separate rooms . . . Will that change now? _

"I see." Albel said tersely, as if he really didn't see at all, or rather he couldn't quite understand. Why did Fayt want to get away from him? And _why_ did the little maggot want to bring those other wretches back to torment him further?

"I don't want you to hate me for being here . . ." Fayt grumbled, absently kicking the ground with his foot.

"It's alright, fool," Albel sighed. "I understand your simple logic." After giving it some thought, Albel had to admit that it was a very wise move. It proved to him once again just how deep Fayt's thoughts could penetrate when it came to their sporadic relationship. If what they had both been feeling was nothing more than a powerful infatuation brought on and fueled by proximity, then Fayt's departure would cause those feelings to fade away. If they grew stronger with his absence then a relationship might be something worth pursuing.

"I'll leave for Peterny tomorrow," Fayt announced, "which means we can spend the rest of today any way you'd like."

"Hmph. I like the sound of that, worm," Albel drawled, bringing his hands up to rest lightly on Fayt's shoulders and descending on the boy for a furtive kiss. It was easier to do the second time around, especially now that he had some idea of where they stood with each other. As long as Fayt was near him, he wanted the boy to know exactly how he felt.

Fayt, of course, didn't object to the older man's choice to spend their day on less than wholesome activities, though he wondered if indulgence was truly the greatest idea. Albel surprised him though by abruptly breaking their contact and pulling away with a satisfied smirk.

"You didn't think I'd actually spend the entire day giving you everything you wanted, did you Fayt?"

"Wha–?" Fayt's question was interrupted by a light cuff to the back of his head.

"I'm afraid my romance quota for the day has been used up. Shall we go spar?" Albel suggested lightly, almost hopefully. An amused smile graced his features as if the possibility for a good fight pleased him much more than any sort of emotional nonsense ever could.

"Are you kidding? Have you already forgotten everything we went through last night? You still look horrible! If anything, you should get some more sleep." Fayt bared his teeth in a taunting smile, "besides, you wouldn't stand a chance against me."

"Oh really?" Albel was almost ready to start another fight, but he frowned slightly instead. It was true that he didn't really feel that well yet, and Fayt was probably just as tired as he was. "Fine then. Come with me, fool."

"Um, where?" Fayt blinked innocently. _To sleep with you?_ Fearing another sarcastic answer, he wisely resisted the urge to blurt the only thought in his head.

Since Albel was not a mind reader he couldn't respond to Fayt's semi-perverted train of thought, and so he answered normally. "Just follow me, and don't ask pointless questions. If I'm heading somewhere, does it really make a difference where I'm going? Or would you stay with me anyway?" Albel smiled warmly at him and Fayt almost passed out from the shock of seeing something so devastatingly happy, and completely unexpected, coming from his usually scowling companion.

But within seconds, the affection of that gaze changed to self-confidant arrogance as Albel turned around and started walking. He already knew the answer to his question because Fayt had given it to him long ago simply by coming back to him. So he continued on walking without bothering to look back, although if he had he would have seen that Fayt was indeed following him, doggedly tracing his steps now, just like he always would.

Of course, when the day came that Fayt would take the lead once again, Albel knew that he would gladly step aside, and return to his old role as follower. It had always been that way after all. Fayt, the prominent leader, provided everyone with hope and direction, while his wicked guardian lingered in the background.

In two weeks Albel would follow Fayt's lead to Peterny, but for today at least, he would be their guide.

ooooo

**A/N:** Well now, looks like we finally have a happy couple in the works . . . or do we? XD Before all the Peterny fun happens, there's still one more day to get through, so that means an unplanned chapter must be written once I wrap my mind around what's going to happen, and get used to typing in this God awful heat wave! So hot! -whines- I miss writing on snowy days . . . So leave a review. Why? Because it keeps this tired author going despite the fact that I'm melting D:


	13. Good Times For a Change

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 13:** Good Times For a Change

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean

**A/N:** Well, I'm back again for another round, although my offering this time is a bit short. With that said, the length is partly due to my desire to end things at a logical stopping point, instead of cramming three or four distinct sections into one "chapter". I've been trying to keep the progression of this fic smooth and logical, and it just felt right to end this one when I did. I hope no one minds, and a shorter chapter will hopefully mean a quicker update, although judging by my past...I make no promises...

ooooo

With a smile on his face and a spring in his step, Fayt eagerly followed Albel's retreating form. Admittedly, his curiosity was peaked, and nothing could have stopped him from finding out just what the wicked swordsman had in store for him. Even so, he couldn't stop the small fingers of anxiety from tickling his consciousness with intrusive worries. Something important had just taken place between them, and everything that was about to happen was probably due to their single shared moment.

Fayt shook his head. He was actually getting worked up over something so trifling it was painful. He trusted Albel completely. Wasn't that what these last few months had been about? All his efforts had only one purpose, and that was convincing the stubborn, self-centered, apathetic man that someone cared enough to place their life in his hands, even when they were fully aware of his past string of failures? To doubt him now, or wonder at the future was not only useless, it was incredibly insulting and did nothing but denounce their possible relationship before it even began.

Their feelings of mutual attraction, admiration and affection were still in their infancy, waiting patiently to grow into something much stronger, something untouchable by doubt or regret. With these thoughts in mind, and a new determination, Fayt quickened his pace, desperate to have Albel close to him.

Albel greeted him with a dismissive snort that clearly said 'you're so predictable', but Fayt didn't mind in the slightest. The insults, and condescending gestures which everyone else found scathing and rude, delighted him. Over time, he had started to find all of Albel's nuances and idiosyncrasies nothing but endearing, and this time was no different. Above all, he knew how to combat Albel's behaviour with a few tricks of his own.

Fact number one, which had only recently jumped to the top of the list, was that Albel found him attractive. It didn't take a genius to figure out how to use that choice bit of information to his advantage, and Fayt was as far from idiotic as they came. He would prove to Albel that the usual remarks had no power over him. Fayt would not be intimidated or controlled by kindergarten antics coming from a man who was supposed to be his greatest opponent.

With calculating precision, Fayt crafted his expression into one of intense boredom, adding a little exhaustion for good measure. His goal was to make Albel feel guilty for keeping him up half the night, when sleep was what he needed most after being so sick in Airyglyph. But Albel's selfish behaviour had kept him wide awake, and coerced him into worrying about Albel's whereabouts. In the end it had even forced him to stay awake even longer to tend to the man who had conveniently collapsed in his lap. There was no way he'd let Albel forget about _that_ little detail.

Fayt took a moment to yawn and stretch languidly, arching his back and treating Albel to a soft groan as his body shivered pleasantly. But Fayt's fun was interrupted by a sudden pain, emanating from the series of claw marks on his arm where Albel had grabbed him. Wincing, Fayt lowered his arm to examine the damage, and frowned at the sight of fresh blood oozing from wounds he thought had closed.

Albel made a curious noise, a low grumble deep in his throat which expressed the concern he couldn't utter aloud. "Change of plans," he stated simply, and motioned for Fayt to follow.

Obediently, Fayt dogged Albel's hasty steps which led away from the Kirlsa Caverns and back toward the heart of town. As they walked, Fayt kept a protective hand over the bleeding wound on his arm. The blood was still seeping through his fingers and running slowly down past his elbow, leaving wet ribbons of red twirling and twisting around his otherwise spotless appendage. It would have been beautiful, if the source hadn't been so disturbing to him.

Before long, they came to the Storm Brigade headquarters and the two entered without hesitation. Young soldiers in the training yard watched them pass with undisguised curiosity, noticing Fayt's bloodstained arm, as well as the invisible connection which had started to bind one young man to the other. Combat Veterans themselves, they were quick to classify Fayt's wound as minor. Those who had witnessed Albel's eccentric behaviour over the course of many years easily saw the change in the young Brigade Captain as he glanced back at the boy who followed him. Surely the wound wasn't bad enough to bring such a worried look to the face of Albel the Wicked.

Those younger and inexperienced took no notice of the injury. Instead, they were more concerned with the fact that Albel was actually letting someone come so close to him without attacking the unlucky soul with a flurry of insults. Even if the young recruits had only known Albel for a short time, it was a good bet to say that he had already given each of them a verbal lashing at some point during the days when he would help Woltar with supervising the trainees. But to see him in the company of nothing more than a child in their eyes, untrained for the most part, was suspicious. There had been various tales passed around town of Fayt's powers in battle, but nearly all of them were difficult to take as truth.

Fayt Leingod, with the help of an Aquarian seductress and his trusty muscle-bound subordinate had not only eluded all three of Airyglyph's military branches but also defeated several of the higher-ranking individuals in hand-to-hand combat. He had ended the war between Airyglyph and Aquaria by bringing divine judgement from the heavens in a blast of blinding light. He had single handedly protected Albel the Wicked from an unnatural beast which had threatened the safety of the town and its people. He was a demon who had fallen from the sky in a ball of flame, and would bring nothing but pain and sorrow to their home and loved ones.

Fayt Leingod was a hero.

Fayt Leingod was a menace.

Fayt Leingod, was Albel the Wicked's chosen companion, and his obedient lover. The man they had all feared was twisted in ways none of them could have imagined. Those rumours were the ones they were willing to believe, judging by Albel's unpredictable nature and Fayt's uniqueness. Some of the soldiers, and most of the townsfolk, knew very little about the Leingod boy's background.

All they ever saw of him was a smiling face, and a helping hand. Fayt was the kind of respectable young man who could charm the young and the old, and apparently the wicked, with ease. It was unsettling, and bred nothing but foul myths about the truth behind all of his charms, and his layers of deceptive kindness. As long as Albel was with him though, no one dared to voice their secret distrust or act on their suspicions.

Unaware of their audience, Albel ushered Fayt through the mansion doors with a scowl. The two companions disappeared into the expansive mansion, and the momentary worries went with them. The men returned to their exercises, and all was peaceful once again.

After reaching the second floor, Fayt instinctively headed for the guest room, but Albel shook his head and strode toward his own bedroom door. Fayt followed him with an agreeable shrug, seeing no reason to argue with the man's choice of venue since he most certainly had his reasons. As usual, Fayt's intuition was dead on.

"Sit," Albel commanded, pointing his index claw at the chair he had pulled up beside the room's dressing table. Without another word, Albel left the room, only to return a few minutes later with a wash basin of warm water as well as a clean cloth.

"Don't bother, fool. You're probably too stupid to do it properly," he sighed when Fayt reached toward the water as if he was preparing to treat himself.

_Strange . . ._ Fayt thought, but there was no point in arguing about it. Sitting patiently in his chair, Fayt took a visual tour of Albel's bedroom. It wasn't the first time he'd been there, but every other time he had been too distracted with other things to actually pay attention to the decor. Fayt wasn't an interior decorator, so he had no reason to notice the expensive looking mahogany floors, the robust four-post bed, or the fascinating throw rug which dominated the floor space much like the room's sole inhabitant was master of his private sphere.

Not that the room actually showed any signs of being _Albel's_. Aside from the rug there were only a few scattered decorations including the faded artwork on the walls, and a couple antique looking katana's mounted above the doorway. It wasn't exactly homey or inviting, but . . .

Fayt sighed and turned his attention back to Albel. After rifling through the cabinet which graced the wall across from the bed, Albel had apparently found what he needed. He had withdrawn an ordinary looking box, which Fayt soon learned was the Glyphian version of a first-aid kit, although it was much more primitive looking than the sleek metal boxes filled with various medications that Fayt was used to.

_At least it's not leeches . . ._ Fayt thought grimly, remembering a passage he had read in what he thought was a dingy old tome. Of course that tome just happened to be an Elicoorian medical textbook. Needless to say he was still a bit leery of the planet's homeopathic remedies which were often as painful, or more so, than the injuries themselves.

But watching Albel soak his cloth in the basin filled with sparkling water, Fayt's worries faded away. Albel was still alive after countless battles, so it was pointless to worry.

Standing before him with cloth in hand, Albel snorted derisively as if what he was about to do was a waste of his precious time, but they both knew it wasn't the truth. With a steady hand, Albel ran the damp cloth over his skin, cleansing the area, and removing any traces of blood or dirt. The slight pressure of the gentle swipe was still a little painful, and Fayt groaned softly because of it. Albel shook his head at the sound, mumbling something along the lines of 'pathetic worm' under his breath, but the mumbled insult only made Fayt smile to himself. He wasn't smiling at the words though. Instead, he was rather pleased with, and somewhat flattered by, the tone of the older man's voice.

It was an utterance of resigned affection, and perhaps a little disbelief. Caring for another must have been shocking for the solitary Nox. He had always lived a proud life of abjection, distancing himself from all forms and extension of human contact which went beyond the meeting of a sword with flesh. He severed humans from their lives with practiced ease every time he met and engaged in this preferred relationship with other people, enemies mostly, but sometimes comrades if they angered him enough.

Any offers of friendship were promptly refused or ignored, and Albel retreated farther back into a world of his own making, one which excluded others and left him alone with his hatred and conceit. He was always trying to convince himself and others that he was superior to everyone who crossed his path. They didn't deserve to be in his presence, and had no claim on the earth he walked, or the battlefield he ruled. The undeserving were cast aside with nothing less than brutal cruelty and, if they were lucky, a round of heartfelt laughter at their misfortune. Albel was owner and master of the space he occupied, and shared it with no one save those who would soon meet death at his hands.

None were allowed to come close to him. The king was untrustworthy and weak. Vox was obnoxious and overbearing, a pompous fool, who hated him for reasons he had never understood. He had always presumed it was jealousy, everyone wanted what he possessed, at least, he thought that was the case. Now though, he understood that his outlook on life only made others leery of him, uneasy in his presence, and he cultivated that fear and used it to his advantage.

The only one who could truly be called a worthy opponent, back then anyway, was his father. He had spent countless nights dreaming of the day he would topple Glou Nox from the pedestal he occupied as supreme commander of the Dragon Brigade. His father was an elite soldier, and unmatched across the entire continent of Gaitt, and it was Albel's destiny to follow in his footsteps. Defeat the father, take his place and prove your worth. That was his purpose, but the opportunity had been taken from him. Unable to prevent the inevitable, his chance at legitimate respect had been stripped away in the most humiliating way possible.

When Glou died for his son's sake, it was the ultimate betrayal of the relationship Albel had developed with the man. He would never have the chance to defeat his father, never be able to conquer the man's legacy and replace it with his own, all because of his insurmountable faults, and glaring insecurities. Albel had been cheated by Fate, and his path became twisted, a sickly abomination unworthy of his father's sacrifice.

Afterwards, it was a proven fact that he was a lesser man than his father, and that he would never surpass him, no matter how hard he tried because Glou had died saving his worthless son. This final act was the ultimate sacrifice performed by an unselfish man.

_Nothing but a fool,_ Albel thought bitterly, _a fool who loved me._ Fayt was his new fool, and one he kept close at all times. He filled Albel's gaping need for rivalry and competition with one he believed was better than himself . . . and loved him at the same time. Why was it that Albel could only truly love those stronger and more capable than himself, and why were beings of strength drawn to his tortured power and implicit weakness?

But something had changed. Fayt's intrusion into his life had changed the equation ever so slightly, and it was enough to give Albel hope. Fayt was not his father. Fayt would never love him in the same way, the same _maddening_ way which reeked of one's parental duty to their offspring. Although it was also true that he could never love Fayt the same as he had loved his father. That was a love which had been full of doubt and frustration as their relationship came to a close.

Every day that Fayt was with him, the desire to stay together grew stronger, and the fear of separation grew fiercer. What would he do, if Fayt met the same end as Glou? It would destroy him, once and for all. His Fate, and his Fayt were intertwined. If he lost one, the other would follow suit.

Albel shifted closer to Fayt and willed himself to concentrate on his task. Why did those types of thoughts have to bother him now? And why here, in his hometown of all places, when Fayt was only inches away and more that capable of picking up on his inner distress? His heart was cursed with the bitter memories and inescapable nostalgia for a time that was long gone and completely lost to him. He could never return to the days of innocence, and the memories and reminders of that time were slowly fading away. Soon, he would forget everything about his life before the tragic incident. Albel's current life was filled with only a few scattered moments of happiness, and even fewer smiles.

Without warning, something unfamiliar and completely unwanted started to happen to the introspective Nox. Horrified, he felt the welling of tears in eyes. Albel blinked several times in an effort to stave them off, and in the end it appeared as though he had succeeded.

But Fayt was observant, and he easily spotted the grief in his caretaker's eyes, fully transfixed by the battle of emotions that was raging across the man's countenance. Realizing that Albel's problems would not be solved by questioning him, or expressing concern, Fayt held his tongue and tried without success to ignore the sadness that was dampening and darkening Albel's bright eyes with repressed tears.

As he grew comfortable, Fayt watched Albel's actions with interest, his eyes following every careful movement performed by the skilled hand and claws. Even with the obvious handicap, Albel was adept at the task, leading Fayt to wonder just how many times Albel had been hurt in the past and needed to doctor his own injuries. Had he ever bothered with the wounds of others, or just his own?

"You used to make me do this myself," Fayt murmured, heaving a contented sigh and leaning his head happily against Albel's chest as the man continued tending to him. It was the only thing he could think of to say, as if distracting Albel with words would protect him from the pain he was trying so hard to hide.

"That's because the other wounds were always due to your own stupidity. This one . . . was my fault," Albel explained while he wrapped the gashes he had inflicted on the boy, silently cursing himself for ever having done it. _My fault . . . like everything else._

"Don't blame yourself anymore, alright?" Fayt pleaded quietly, stroking Albel's pale cheek with his free hand, and smiling at the embarrassed shade of pink which followed his touch. Fayt knew that the reaction was due not to the embarrassment of being touched, but rather to the unfamiliar sensation of enjoyment that accompanied it. If Albel had ever felt the loving caress of another, it was probably one-sided. To be reminded of their mutual feelings in such a way had no doubt left him feeling uncharacteristically awkward.

Wanting to cover his sudden slip in behaviour, Albel tsked at him in annoyance, as if the contact was never really wanted in the first place. With a final, merciless tug on the bandages he secured them to Fayt's arm and stood back to admire his handiwork. "Hmph, you're done."

_He's happy again, I think . . ._ Fayt celebrated the news in silence, and stared at his glistening fingertips which were glazed with the residue of one man's sadness. A single tear had made it past Albel's innumerable defenses, but Fayt must have been the only one who noticed because Albel continued to act as if nothing was wrong.

Satisfied with how things had turned out, Albel gave the boy a nod which told him it was alright to move, and Fayt showed no hesitation in doing so. Fayt flexed the arm a bit, testing to see if everything was as secure as Albel thought it was before rising to his feet. "So, now what?" he asked brightly, looking to his moody nurse for answers.

"You wanted a day off, correct?" Albel started, raising a questioning eyebrow even though he knew exactly what Fayt had said earlier. The man didn't miss much in fact, unless he chose to overlook something, and he definitely didn't miss the answering smile Fayt gave him.

"I recall saying that you should rest. Did you have something else in mind?" The boy said. His tone was casual, but it still had the familiar embedded taunt which was present in nearly all of their discussions.

Albel stared at him, his expression blank for the most part as he weighed responses. If he was going to take a day for himself, he wanted Fayt to join him. Albel had never been one to seek companionship with anyone, but for today at least, he wanted to make the effort. "Didn't I ask you to come with me?" He spoke softly, but his fierce red eyes blazed with a silent challenge, blatantly daring Fayt to refuse his offer.

"Alright then, Albel," Fayt replied, before he could invoke the Wicked One's ire. His gentle voice was already adept at soothing Albel's apprehension no matter what situation they found themselves in, and Fayt knew that he would gain more if he resigned from the potential battle of wills than if he played until the bitter end. He took a bold step past Albel, only to look back at the quiet man with an inviting smile which promised only good things. "Let's go," he urged, and waited patiently for the other man to resume his role as leader for the day.

_Fayt . . ._ Pleased beyond expression, Albel smiled a little to himself and brushed past the younger man. Things between them had started off on a sour note that morning, but Albel was almost certain that it would be a good day after all. For the first time in a long time, he had everything he could ever want.

ooooo

**A/N:** So... After a long wait I suppose this chapter was a bit short compared to the others, but I'm rather fond of it myself. Consider it a little lighthearted fluff spawned from a small case of writers block...er, not really a block so much as writers laziness... So tell me what you think folks. Do ya like it short and sweet? Or longer and full of plot bits? Remember, every comment counts, and I love you guys who take the time to share your thoughts every chapter. So put simply, reviews make the authoress happy, and a happy authoress won't get sad and start killing characters;) Hehehe, or will she:D


	14. Wait and See

**Title:** Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 14:** Wait and See

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Ocean.

**A/N:** Once again, I got wordy and stuff ended up being pushed into the next chapter...which I am considering revising. Half of the next one is already written, I just need to decide which parts will become intimate with the delete key. XD

Ahem. On to more important matters. To those who were kind enough to review last round, I truly appreciate all the feedback received. I can't thank you enough.

ooooo

After a brisk walk through the town, they exited Kirlsa to the south, and entered territory which Fayt hadn't seen since his first days on Elicoor with Cliff and Nel. It was the pathway to the Kirlsa Training Facility, headquarters of the notorious Black Brigade, led by none other than Albel the Wicked himself.

_Albel . . . _The familiar name drifted through his thoughts, and he welcomed it with an open heart. Even geography reminded him of that man! When he and Cliff had come to Nel's rescue, he had never imagined that it would end up in a fateful meeting between him and the Glyphian swordsman.

Shelby on the other hand, Fayt had to admit, was incredibly _typical_ of what he secretly had expected to meet as representative for the seemingly barbaric kingdom. Large, strong, and greedy, Shelby possessed a lust for power so unlike Albel's that it was no wonder the two had despised each other. Fayt corrected himself. It would be a waste of Albel's precious hatred to despise that pathetic beast of a man. Being driven by the need to conquer and control as Shelby had been, was too shameful.

The marked contrasts between the two men were so vivid when Albel finally did make his appearance, Fayt had even been somewhat impressed by the Brigade's Captain. Only impressed though, not intimidated.

The little banter that had occurred between them at that time, in retrospect, was too amusing. It had become a fond memory for him as the day he had challenged Albel the Wicked's morals on his own turf, daring to berate the man for his subordinate's incompetence.

There may have been a time when Fayt would have backed down, and taken the chance for escape offered to them without a second thought . . . so why had he spoken up? And did that mark him as "different" in Albel's intelligent eyes? Special? Dangerous?

_Nothing of the sort . . . I think I annoyed him . . . but maybe that was enough._ Fayt continued to shuffle along, daring to risk a glance at Albel as his thoughts continued wandering to past events and current feelings. _We were nothing to him, less than nothing . . . but that changed. Am I important to him now? More than his old obsessions?_

But why had he even argued with the stranger? Why had he bothered provoking an enemy? Was it because he was foolish? Nothing more than a child in a fantasy world with dragons and kings? It could have been due to his own pride. After all, Fayt was still being driven by the euphoria of defeating Shelby, the Heavy Handed. That man had a name and a reputation feared by the Aquarians, just like Albel, but Shelby could not claim to be _the best_. Albel was still number one, but the man really hadn't acted like a responsible leader.

The only explanation was that Albel just wasn't meant to lead. He was a master of dominance, controlling his own men through fear and rage, but in the end that style of leadership failed him. His men failed him. Albel failed himself and his reputation swiftly changed from an exalted leader, to nothing more than a wretched traitor. But his comeuppance came when he was released into the service of outlanders . . .

And became a hesitant follower of Fayt.

Things hadn't always been pleasant, but eventually the unlikely group had come to terms, especially Albel and Fayt. Though sometimes, it seemed like nothing had really changed between them. Albel spoke; Fayt listened, and vice versa until they reached an intellectual stalemate. Neither one would ever budge on their ideals. It always amazed him to think that despite their obvious differences, he and Albel actually got along well . . . more than well it seemed.

Fayt smiled as if he was lost in a dream, so enthralled by memories and musings, that he never noticed it when Albel took a moment to glance back at him. The elder warrior noticed the distracted smile and couldn't help grinning to himself.

Fayt was pleased, and Albel was content with that knowledge. Whatever the boy meant to him, it had increased tenfold since that morning. Albel could recognize the signs, just like before, except this time he welcomed the feelings which made his entire body tingle. Of course it could just as easily have been the alcohol . . .

Having finally decided that it would be beneficial to pay attention to what was happening, Fayt perked up and took another sweeping examination of the countryside, gathering his bearings as best he could in the unfamiliar surroundings. He noticed at once that there was something odd about the land they were currently tracking through, something . . . unique. Unable to place a finger on what it was exactly, Fayt didn't hesitate to ask the one person who _should_ know at least something about his homeland.

"What is this place called again?"

"Hmm?" Albel shot him a bored look, but ended up smirking at Fayt's honest curiosity . . . and utterly delightful lack of knowledge.

Though he realized that there were innumerable ways to answer that simple question, Albel settled for telling Fayt exactly what he wanted to know right away, without the usual games.

"Granah Hills." Albel's answer came easily enough, considering how many times he had traversed this well-worn path in his lifetime.

Albel paused briefly and reflected upon those times, each one being so different from the last. How many times had he been this way, and used the same trail when returning to Kirlsa? He hadn't always been alone. As a child he had often gone with his father . . . and now, he walked with Fayt. Was his life that cyclical? Had Fortune's wheel spun until it was finally in his favour? And if so, would he eventually find himself on the bottom once again . . . ?

"Um, is that all you have to say?" Fayt prompted carefully. He had a name for the place, but still no answer to the nagging feeling that something was different about it. What exactly set it apart from the rest of Airyglyph?

_He needs more information?_ "Take a good look around you, fool. What do you see?"

_What the hell am I looking for?_ Fayt thought darkly as he did what he was told. The land was mostly flat, surrounded by the usual mountains, and there was no greenery to speak of . . . _Come to think of it, the land's unusually flat, not hills at all . . . almost as if it was done intentionally. It's unnatural! _

From his first meaningful observation, Fayt was able to conclude much more based on what he saw next. Small, well-kept buildings dotted the outskirts of the flattened land. They weren't abandoned like he had first assumed. Nodding a little to himself, Fayt was ready to give his deduction, but Albel beat him to it.

"Granah Hills is the only land suitable for agriculture in Airyglyph," Albel supplied happily, solely because he knew Fayt had already come to the conclusion on his own and he wanted to steal away that small victory from the boy.

Fayt sighed in defeat when Albel provided him with the information, secretly pleased that Albel could read him so well . . . although it was a little depressing to think that everything he did was _that_ obvious to anyone who was paying attention to him.

Albel sobered a little and continued with his description. "Compared to Aquaria, Airyglyph is practically barren. This is all we have to work with. If it wasn't for the profits made by mining operations, the country would be even poorer. With those funds, we're able to purchase enough food to offset the small harvest, but . . . "

"Even then, if there's a particularly bad winter, or crops are somehow ruined," Fayt continued sadly, "the people starve."

"So you see why war was a necessity. Not that I ever complained," Albel shrugged lightly and grinned, an unmistakable predatory glint in his deep, ruby eyes.

That crazed look made Fayt shiver despite the feelings he had developed for the eccentric warrior. During their discussion of finances and farming practices, Fayt had almost forgotten just whom he was talking to. But now there was no mistaking it. Albel Nox, the demon of the battlefield, terrifying to nearly all who came into contact with him . . . was incredibly well versed in his country's politics. Fayt had to admire that aspect, adding it to his long list of things he loved about the man, even though knowledge of his country's economic landscape was probably only used as a means to justify the lengths Albel would take to satisfy his bloodlust.

It was much easier to say you fight to better your land, rather than for the sheer enjoyment of it, yet even that didn't sit well with Fayt. Somehow, he knew that Albel's concern for his homeland was real, no matter how much he tried to conceal the fact. Even though Albel claimed to live for battle there were quite possibly other motives driving him that the Wicked One himself wasn't even aware of.

"I put everything I had into bettering Airyglyph . . . " Fayt stated, reciting the words which had been said to him long ago. "Isn't that what you told me once?"

The unexpected reminder elicited a brief expression of shock from Albel, but the slight glimpse of emotion was quickly exchanged for a flimsy excuse. "I was merely frustrated . . . "

"Right." Fayt rolled his eyes. _Liar. But why is it worth lying about something like that? Because he tried and failed?_

"Hmph, we're here. Follow." Placing his feet carefully, Albel picked his way down the sloping path which apparently led down to the coastline.

Fayt watched him go, eyeing the old pathway with suspicion. It was grown over completely, and only someone who already knew of its existence would have been able to spot it. His gaze left Albel and passed over the ocean itself, realizing for the first time that the land actually dropped off into a steep cliff . . . and Albel had led him straight to the edge. Not that he was afraid of heights or anything, but anyone with a scrap of common sense in their head would never wander so close to the edge, especially given the fact that the land's condition had obviously been deteriorating steadily. Whatever memory Albel had of the place had lost its viability a long time ago.

_But if I refuse, he'll probably assume that I don't trust him. Geez._ Miserable about his choices, Fayt shook his head and frowned at the decrepit old trail. He was most likely going to tumble to his death in the most ungraceful way possible, but . . .

"You're not frightened, are you, fool?" Albel taunted from where he stood, only a third of the way down the cliff side.

_Idiot. If anything happens . . . I'll take him down with me._ Forcing a smile to hide his thoughts, Fayt took a few steps forward. "No worries here, Albel. I have you to cushion my fall, right?"

"Heh, if you start rolling, I'll stop you . . . with my sword. Of course I'm hesitant to use it on someone as pathetic as you, so please, try your best _not_ to embarrass yourself, hmm?"

_In other words, 'be careful'_. "You never change, do you?" Fayt sighed. It was a redundant question. Albel hadn't heard him, and even if he had, there was no clear answer. _Albel_ has _changed, and I'm grateful for it, but . . . I don't want to lose_ this _either._

Making his way carefully down the precarious trail, Fayt eventually reached the bottom. Of course Albel had been standing there for a while without him, and the older man made no effort to even acknowledge Fayt's presence. Instead he stood motionless, his hair the only thing moving as it swayed in the ocean breeze. Albel smiled to himself. It was just like he remembered.

"So, you've got your own private beach?" Fayt asked, but then his humouring smile turned into a frown. _Maybe "beach" isn't the best word for this place . . . _

Actually, Albel's "beach" was just a narrow strip of dirt which met the ocean. It was hardly a tropical paradise like the typical resort planets boasted. The rest of the inland shore consisted of sharp rocks and small, menacing crevasses which looked rather suspicious to Fayt's curious gaze.

In response to his question, Albel turned to him and nodded. He was apparently searching for any kind of acceptance or approval from Fayt, who couldn't deny him, even if the place did look like a veritable wasteland. The spot had been neglected and probably long forgotten to any who might have cared, except Albel _did_ care, at least it _seemed_ like he did . . .

"It's nice," Fayt said finally, proud of himself for coming up with a positive, but not entirely committed, answer. Albel's seemingly uncaring 'hmph' made him smile. Not only did it matter, it was obviously important that he have a good opinion of the place.

His answer had put the wistful swordsman in a better mood, and the rest of the day would likely be filled with the mild pleasures of an emotionally suggestible Albel Nox. Fayt could sense things changing, feeling their relationship shifting, evolving into something new. Albel was being reasonably kind to him, but only him, surprisingly enough. Feeling sufficiently confident that his companion was open to a serious chat, Fayt attempted to pry into matters with a question.

"What is this place?"

"Isn't that obvious, fool? Or have you never seen the ocean before?"

"I haven't seen the ocean up close since . . . " Fayt paused. His thoughts were dredging up unpleasant memories. The fun-filled days on Hyda with Sophia and his parents had fallen through the cracks of his recollections as he subconsciously avoided his old pain. Separation and loss were swift to return though, and Fayt quickly bowed his head, shielding his raw emotions from Albel's curious stare.

_Where did everything go wrong?_ Fayt thought bleakly. Shaking his head, Fayt ignored his troubling thoughts and concocted a suitable answer which would hopefully wipe the confused look right off Albel's face.

"Ah, honestly? The closest I've been to an Elicoorian ocean was when we travelled to Aquios, but it wasn't like this. You're lucky, and I don't think you know how much. On Earth, technological advances and an explosive population forced people to build alternate living areas on the ocean. Sort of like, conventional dwellings, but it was only possible by creating new stretches of land. At first it was small, just expanding existing coastlines, but then they started making islands, continents . . . "

Fayt shook his head wearily. "But that's not the point. I want to know what this place means to you," he clarified, hoping that Albel would take the time to explain the calm that seemed to come over him as he gazed in subdued wonder out into the ocean. What was it about the sea that pleased him? What was he hoping to gain from coming to the rundown spot?

But Albel only shifted his stance, and tilted his head to watch a seagull glide lazily above them.

_Well, they do say ignorance is bliss . . ._

While continuing to ignore Fayt's curiosity, Albel started walking further up the narrow sandbar with purposeful strides. "Fine, don't tell me," Fayt sighed, breaking into a brisk walk to keep up. "But you could at least explain why we're here."

"To relax, of course," Albel answered, his voice exuding nothing but calm annoyance. "No one will bother us here. It's completely isolated, and . . . quiet." Albel walked on, and Fayt followed until the two men reached a flat section of sand. It wasn't strewn with rocks like the rest of the land, and Albel quickly kicked away any bits of debris so it was clear enough for his purposes. It was here that the Wicked One settled, taking a seat on the ground before motioning for Fayt to follow.

Fayt wasted no time in joining the other man, sitting down lightly with obvious relief. It wasn't ideal, but there was something comforting about the scenario he found himself in. _I didn't know that doing nothing could be so enjoyable._

Before long, Albel leaned further back against the rock wall which paralleled the small beach, his eyelids drooping slowly shut with fatigue. The events of the past few days were catching up with him, and Albel didn't feel like fighting it any longer. Even if Albel had possessed the strength, his will, was gone.

Only the sound of a wry chuckle emanating from his younger companion kept sleep at bay. "So if you're just going to sleep, why did you drag me along?" It was cruel to bother the blatantly weary Albel, but Fayt knew that any form of sympathy would be taken the wrong way. That's just how things were between them.

For a moment, it appeared as though Albel was going to ignore the comments lobbed against him by resuming his rest, and in light of this, Fayt found his mind wandering to the past once again. His brow furrowed as Fayt tried to remember the last time he had seen Albel relaxing, and came to the sad conclusion that the last time . . . was never. Once, in Aquios, Fayt had chanced upon the Glyphian sitting in the castle's council room, but that was only because the Aquarians had chosen not to provide Albel with his own quarters. Every other time he had seen him, Albel would be pacing back and forth impatiently while waiting to leave and fight.

Then there were the nights when Albel should have been sleeping, but was no doubt keeping himself awake with brooding thoughts. Given what had happened between them in Peterny, Fayt knew that Albel's true concerns were most likely smouldering under his cool exterior, tormenting him to no end. That night though, they had surfaced and their relationship had become dramatically different because of it. Albel wanted to be reassured about his status within the group, and in Fayt's eyes, but he would never admit to such a thing. _Things have changed so much since then . . . so much has happened . . . so many good things._

"You've changed since we captured you that day . . . Do you remember, Fayt?"

The boy blinked at the sound of his name. He had been startled from his own musings only to hear them echoed in Albel's question. The older man was staring pointedly at him, studying his reaction it seemed, while waiting for a reply.

"What do you--?"

"You're not nearly as pitiful . . . ," Albel murmured, raising his hand to Fayt's face, and trailing a slender index finger down his cheek. The flicker of burnished desire in Albel's eyes caught him off guard, and Fayt's breath hitched.

"S-so back then--"

"Mmn." Albel's lips were at his throat, kissing him with unexpected gentleness.

". . . Albel. I-I wonder what would have, ah, happened if we hadn't sided w-with Nel." Fayt craned his neck, encouraging more of Albel's attentions before mumbling the rest of his thought. "M-maybe you and I would have been friends much earlier, hmm?"

Albel sighed and pulled away. "Or perhaps you would have rotted in our dungeons," Albel replied casually, his shoulders lifting in a dismissive shrug as he backed off. Of all the things he disliked, lingering on what might have been bothered him a little more than the others. _What if_ Fayt had joined Airyglyph in the war instead of Aquaria? Albel couldn't repress the smirk which the idea brought to his lips. That _would_ have been interesting, but there were other 'what ifs' that were not so pleasant to dwell on.

What if he had grown up with the love of both parents instead of just the one-sided nurturing of his celebrity father? What if he had been stronger as a child? What if he had died . . . ?

"Everything is connected, isn't it?" Fayt's solemn voice cleaved the swordsman's dark thoughts with hope. "When one path is blocked to you, another opens. I know that a lot has happened to you, hell, to both of us but, " Fayt smiled faintly, and cast his eyes toward the ground as his voiced dipped to a whisper. "In the end though, I'm glad that things happened the way they did because I'm afraid that if it had happened any other way," Fayt raised his head and looked deep into crimson eyes, "your path wouldn't have led to me . . . "

Albel favoured him with a sardonic grin. "So all the pain I've suffered . . . You're my reward?"

Fayt blushed. "I didn't mean it that way. I guess I'm just being selfish. This can't compare to having a father, can it?" _Stupid._

"You can answer that one just as well as I, you know. Everything happens for a reason. You're mine. I can't complain."

A stunned silence followed Albel's confession during which Fayt felt himself trembling. For Albel to admit having such strong feelings . . . _I mean that much to him?_ Still trying to take it all in, Fayt fought hard to regain his senses. While the sudden declaration of his worth was more than welcome, Fayt hadn't forgotten the reasoning behind their little daytrip.

"G-get some rest, Albel. I'll keep watch, alright?"

Albel shook his head in fierce indignation. "What are you suggesting? I don't need you to--!" But Fayt quickly cut his protest short.

"Yeah? Well I'm going to do it anyway. You're tired; there's no point in hiding it from me. Maybe it's the permanent black bags under your eyes, but I think you're working too hard. Your body won't last if you keep pushing yourself like this just so you'll seem invincible . . . "

". . . You worry too much," Albel admonished quietly, even though Fayt's argument pleased him. It had been a long time since anyone had worried about his well-being, and he prayed the outcome of that concern would be different this time.

Fayt nodded and smiled warmly. "Always," he whispered, running a hand through Albel's windswept bangs. Albel flushed slightly, and submitted to Fayt's attentions without complaint. It was the most subtle hint he could give to show the boy that he was enjoying it. "I always wondered about you, and some might have considered it worrying, but I don't want to wonder anymore. I want to know you. Everything. But first you're gonna rest, got it?" Fayt ceased playing with Albel's two-toned locks and gave the man a stern look. _He just won't let himself relax . . . Even when he's worked beyond his capabilities, the idiot's too stubborn to admit that he needs a break._

"If it will shut you up, then I'll do it," Albel grumbled, growing impatient with the younger male's games.

"That's all I'm asking."

"Hmph, this is a waste of my time, you know," Albel reminded him, although some of the scorn was lost from his words as Albel closed his eyes in preparation for sleep. Granted, the man's rest would most likely be severely inconvenienced by the fact that he had chosen to remain sitting upright rather than actually lying down on the soft section of beach, but such details did not concern the warrior. It was more comforting for Albel to know that even while at rest, he would be able to rise quickly and defend himself if needed.

Against his wishes to stay awake a little longer, Albel quickly dozed off, unknowingly leaning against Fayt for support as he napped. If there had ever been a greater display of trust, Fayt hadn't seen it yet, and this small expression of contentment pleased him more than anything else.

"No rest for the wicked . . . " Fayt sighed, and shifted his position so his companion would be more comfortable. Unable to think of anything other than the pleasant feeling of Albel's warm body pressed against his own, Fayt turned his attention to back toward the seascape. Fayt sat silent and motionless for what seemed like ages, and continued staring absently out at the ocean until finally, his calm green eyes threatened to flutter shut against his will. All the talk of sleep had made him drowsy, and he was not going to be able to keep his promise.

ooooo

The sun was already dipping under the horizon when one half of the dozing pair began to stir. Blinking to clear the haze of sleep, two groggy red eyes were reintroduced into the waking world. A half-hearted yawn followed as Albel struggled to rouse his sluggish body into action, but it was not going to be easy. As awareness dawned on him, Albel finally noticed his slumbering partner, or rather, he noticed the arm that had inexplicably curled around the boy's shoulders. Still in denial, he refused to acknowledge the fact that he was holding Fayt much like a cherished plush toy, clutching the sleeping boy tightly against his chest as if he was afraid of someone taking him away. Fayt, too, held onto Albel with all his might, his arms wrapped possessively around the older man's waist. Albel sighed and silently considered his options. Letting Fayt rest longer was tempting, but . . .

"Wake up, fool," Albel whispered, the words sounding kinder than he had intended. Fayt muttered annoyed curses under his breath and cuddled closer. As usual, the attempted kindness had not provided Albel with the desired result. It was time to fall back on old tactics . . . but he couldn't do it. Violence was Albel's closest friend, so why did he settle for merely shrugging Fayt off?

Suddenly cold, Fayt's contented smile faded into a frown, and he started to shiver. After several unsuccessful attempts to recapture Albel's warmth, and finding only empty space as the swordsman easily avoided his grasp, Fayt groaned and opened his eyes. Bleary emeralds caught sight of smirking rubies, and Fayt hung his head in shame. "I fell asleep?" he asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

"Clever, aren't you?" Albel said dryly. "At least you weren't flailing around like you used to."

"That only happened once, and it wasn't even my fault! It was Cliff's idea to camp next to that stupid pond . . . "

Albel grinned, but didn't seem to regret his words. "And the fool didn't realize it was infested with hungry mosquito larvae. I remember . . . or rather I recall advising against it, only to be threatened and browbeaten by that idiot for questioning his decision."

Fayt chuckled quietly. It wasn't often that the bitterness of Albel's comments amused him, but this time he couldn't help it. Albel and Cliff had never seen eye to eye on everything, at least nothing important. Their personalities were too large to coexist, and any interaction between the two headstrong men had always teamed with insults, both explicit or implied. They argued fiercely, but Albel was always the first to back down after claiming that Cliff was a waste of his precious time and intellect. Cliff would fume, and Albel would smirk, giving rise to even more tension. It was an interesting relationship, if nothing else, and Fayt knew that all the posturing was nothing more than an act. He couldn't believe that his friends actually disliked each other that much, but squabbling over pointless details and such had become so routine, they wouldn't stop even if the feelings between them had changed.

"Cliff is smarter than you give him credit for, Albel. He's overbearing, but kind, and reliable . . . to a point, and I trust him to always have my best interests at heart."

_Do you trust him more than me?_ The question begged to be asked, but Albel ignored it and chose to remain silent. He really didn't expect the answer to be in his favour, and jealousy of Cliff's relationship with Fayt was not something he wanted to feel. "If you say so," Albel shrugged. He was trying to appear unaffected, and failing miserably, but Fayt let it slide for the moment. Wading through all of Albel's complex insecurities would take time, and there wasn't even any guarantee that he'd ever be able to confront the older man about his issues, but Fayt wanted to try, at the very least.

"Come on, Albel. Let's go," Fayt said, calmly taking Albel's hand in his own and rising to his feet. The brooding Nox had no choice but to follow. He didn't even object when Fayt gently tugged on his arm to get him moving. Albel trudged on in pained silence as Fayt led him back up the narrow incline.

While walking back along the flat, dirt trail toward Kirlsa, Albel continued to sulk. Every so often he would feel the brush of a careless arm against his own, and each time he would inch just a little closer to the younger man who strode placidly beside him. It was nice to feel the touch of another, even if it was unintentional on Fayt's part. The proud Captain was experiencing a strange longing for contact, and he wondered what absurd things he would do, or say, just to receive a brief caress from his chosen one. Deeper in his psyche though, he still wondered why it was so important to be near this person, and no one else. He was selective to the point of frigid, yet Fayt had always made him burn with emotion.

Anger and shame had come first, of course. Learning that Fayt harbored none of the same feelings confused him, and tricked him into new feelings and temptations not unlike those he felt in battle. The passion was there, and the lust, but they were no longer destructive forces. In the past, he had courted death and chaos. Now, though, Albel was learning to weave and twist through the landscape of affection.

A bitter chill in the evening air encircled them, and Fayt rubbed his bare arms, suddenly feeling terribly underdressed. Albel, too, pulled his arm away and brushed a strand of hair behind his ear, determined not to show any signs of disappointment. It was obvious that Fayt wasn't experiencing the same things as he was, not that it really mattered to him one way or the other. There would be another opportunity to get the boy close, preferably somewhere more comfortable than the Glyphian wilderness.

They continued along the darkening path in the same manner until finally reaching the city limits. The returning pair was met by the soft illumination of Kirlsa just as early evening was taken over by nightfall. Despite the time, people were still bustling through the streets of the small border town, scurrying here and there, completely absorbed in all manners of meaningless tasks. Albel tsked quietly at the sight of the townsfolk, disturbed by the utter lack of awareness that each individual displayed.

Few bothered greeting them with little more than a nod and an excuse to be on their way. It was disrespectful at the very least, and borderline insulting in Albel's mind. He had never been impressed by the groveling masses before, but the absence of proper acknowledgment set of warning flares in his brain. People were not supposed to feel comfortable enough in his presence to dismiss him so easily. They should have been cringing in fear, or avoiding him completely, not passing by with bright smiles and swift greetings.

It never occurred to him that being with Fayt might have something to do with the people's strange behaviour. Still walking merrily at Albel's side, Fayt was returning every one of the kind greetings and responding with his own naturally cheerful smile. They were all so alike. Albel felt like an outsider, watching every interaction with unwanted envy, and something more sinister. There was something disturbing to him about everyone's actions, and Albel's skin prickled with suspicion.

Perhaps he hadn't noticed just how lax the subjects of Airyglyph had become since the war had ended. They were peaceful, not prosperous, yet morale was still much higher than before. Did they even realize that their country had _lost_ the war? Would they ever comprehend just how close they had come to losing everything? Did they know how easily the tentative serenity could be taken from them again? His entire country had let its guard down, and Albel could do nothing but seethe endlessly about the pointless lives led by the maggots who surrounded him. "Ungrateful fools . . . ," he growled, surprising Fayt who reached out, touching Albel's arm in an attempt to calm his anger.

"Albel, I don't see anything wrong with the people here. What's wrong?"

"They're no longer living in fear. If we were attacked, there would be no hope for any of them. Peace has made them soft." Albel shook his head in disgust. _They'll never change._ "It's not good."

_He's worried about them._ "Airyglyph's not exactly in danger anymore, though," Fayt reminded him. "I doubt that Aquaria would ever attack unprovoked, and you don't actually think that Greeton would bother with a kingdom like this, do you? I can't see any benefits to another war, for any of the possible parties. You'll just have to accept it, Albel."

"Accept what?" he spat.

"There's no one left for you to fight. This world has run out of decent enemies. No one wants unnecessary conflict. Peace isn't a bad thing, you know? You might like it."

"Even you, Fayt?" Albel became distant as he spoke, hinting at his disappointment. _You're truly a fool, Fayt . . . _He didn't want to believe that Fayt could be so blind, or so incredibly optimistic. Surely after everything the boy had been through, he would realize that life often takes a turn for the worst when you least expect it. To cultivate ignorance is to invite death. "I never imagined that you would have succumbed to this false peace. Please, do not underestimate an opponent you know so little about. I'll grant you that Aquaria will remain silent, but Greeton is . . . " Albel stopped himself. He would never be able to look Fayt in the eye and crush his hopes with the truth. _He feels safe here, so I have to keep him safe. I can't let him worry anymore. He worries enough about trivial things . . . _

Albel bowed his head and sighed. "Never mind."

Confused, but unsure of how to comment on Albel's decision not to finish his statement, Fayt grew quiet. Albel most certainly had a good reason to explain his actions, but apparently it wasn't his business to know what that reason was, nor would they have had the time to explore the awkward pause. In the short time spent discussing the state of the townspeople, the scene had changed once again to the front of Woltar's mansion.

It didn't take them long to pass through the richly decorated ground floor while heading toward the main staircase. At the top of the stairs, both young men turned to part ways, when Fayt reached out and held Albel back, thinking through a question that was forming on his lips.

"You never told me why we went there, did you?"

"It's not important."

"I still want to know," Fayt persisted, and Albel knew he didn't stand a chance.

"I used to go there with my father, to play when I was younger and then later to train. He claimed that the sound of the ocean could calm a wrathful mind. I think he was trying to teach me a lesson."

"Did it work?"

"Not until today," Albel said softly, taking a small step closer to Fayt, drawing the boy into an awkward embrace. Grace eluded him when he needed it most.

Fayt leaned against him, and Albel's discomfort level rose accordingly. A pair of affectionate hands crept over the small of his back and lightly stroked the skin, running gentle, soothing fingers across tense muscles. He couldn't hide anything from the boy. Closing his eyes, Albel exhaled slowly, and relaxed in Fayt's arms.

"Your father sounds like a good man," Fayt murmured into his chest. It seemed like the right thing to say. Anyone else would have been pleased by the compliment, but feeling Albel stiffen defensively had Fayt questioning his judgement.

"I suppose he was," Albel replied tersely, swallowing a sarcastic retort. The moment he was living in was too precious to lose, and not worth spoiling over long buried, bitter memories. _He was always better. I can never surpass him. Even in death, I cannot match him._

Fayt lowered his head and spoke quietly, mindful of the old captain who was fast asleep in a room across the hall. "He'd be proud of you." _I'm proud of you._ "Even if you don't think that's the case. You've accomplished more than he ever would have. Remember that."

"If it wasn't so late," Albel whispered back, "I'd ask you to list those things for me." He couldn't stop smiling - just a little, of course - at the praise. _Stubborn fool. To be so certain . . . _

"I'm not tired . . . " Fayt stood back, and cupped Albel's face in his hands, waiting patiently for a response to his offer. Seeing the shy attachment in the older man's eyes caught Fayt off guard, and suddenly he knew that their upcoming separation would be more difficult than he had originally assumed.

"Funny," Albel chuckled softly. "Neither am I."

ooooo

**A/N:** So where is all of this going? Well, I'm stuck between two ideas with no solution in sight. Hmm...this could take a while. All I know for certain is there's a bed involved. ;) Now then, I shall take my leave. But before I go, might I ask just one favour? Review?


	15. Unlovable

**Title: **Heaven Beside You

**Chapter 15: **Unlovable

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Star Ocean.

**Warning: **A general warning for this, and future chapters. Expect sex. It's about time, and I think you guys have earned it. With that said, I really don't want to post a specific warning on each chapter indicating what's going to happen because that totally ruins the plot and/or any surprises. So expect the unexpected, be intelligent readers, and if you don't like the way things are heading, (it'll be pretty damn obvious when they start going down that path), then don't read if it makes you uncomfortable. Sometimes I forget that the rest of the world isn't completely desensitized to everything like I am, and other times I wonder what it would be like to return to an innocent state of mind...I wonder, but I sure as hell don't want to go back there.

**A/N: **Okay! I'm a little rusty, so bear with me folks. You may have noticed that this has been going on for a year. A whole, bloody year. So thanks to everyone who's supported my little endeavor here in one way or another! Granted, it'll probably take another year to finish...-cough- Anyway...here's the next chapter. It was incredibly hard to finish because I am getting increasingly lazy, but I do try. Really. I just need occasional beatings with a motivation stick, that's all.

ooooo

"Unfortunately," Albel sighed, directing Fayt's attention toward the two guardsman making their rounds at the bottom of the stairs. "We're not the only ones awake at this hour."

The pair of Storm Brigade soldiers were going about their duties a little too slowly for Albel's liking, and the attempted discreet glances being cast up toward the second floor were much too curious. Talk around town was bad enough without giving any new ideas to those inclined to gossip. The last thing they needed was proof that something was going on.

Fayt chuckled softly, curbing his disappointment with laughter. It was surprisingly hard to let go, but he managed. Only a few seconds needed to pass after Albel's warning before he was able to step away from the embrace. "Ah, good night, then." Fayt nodded in respectful farewell and turned away to seek his own bed.

"Good night," Albel repeated, standing alone in the darkened halls, long after Fayt was gone. He waited until the lights in the guest room flickered out, and then, reluctantly, Albel sought the comfort of sleep for himself.

ooooo

Not long after he had settled down, Fayt was awakened by a strange feeling. Sensing another presence watching him, Fayt turned toward his bedroom door. He always slept with it slightly ajar, allowing the faint glow from hallway lanterns to light the small guest room so it was more cheerful and welcoming. Those same lights were now treating him to a sight he never expected, at least, not tonight at any rate. In his doorway was the unmistakable silhouette of a man he had grown to love.

It was surreal. Tonight, Albel had come to him. Standing in the doorway, silhouetted by the glow from outside, Albel was presented to him in a vision of stoic beauty. The shape of that body, which Fayt had become so accustomed to, was special to him, despite the fact that he was so familiar with every inch of the man who stood framed in his doorway. Every time Albel graced Fayt's field of vision, he couldn't help but stare in stark idolatry of the man.

But the Albel Nox who greeted him now was not entirely recognizable as the same Albel he had spent so much time with day in and day out. It was another side of the warrior then he knew, perhaps even a side that Albel himself hadn't realized existed until their confrontation that afternoon. Gone were the adornments of war that had clearly marked Albel as a violent entity, replaced with the naked simplicity of humanity. Fayt's Albel, the Wicked One, had cast off his layers of defenses and emotional protections along with his armor.

Albel was dressed in an elegant violet robe, which was certainly something Fayt could never have envisioned, not that he was dissatisfied with the change. It must have been silk, or perhaps some material even finer judging by the way it clung to Albel's slender frame in some areas, hanging loosely in others, altogether shaped accordingly to suit him.

It was so thin that it seemed to be a part of him, an extension of Albel's character which was softer, gentler, and more subdued than what he usually displayed to those around him. There was nothing flamboyant about his choice either, nothing which flaunted his well-defined muscles and toned form while emphasizing every one of his striking features in the most glaring way possible. Dressing provocatively had always been beneficial for the cunning swordsman, but tonight was a special occasion.

In the simplistic nightwear, Albel's physical delights were muted, but no less attractive in Fayt's eyes. It could have been the way the fabric hung loosely, inviting an active imagination rather than clinging skin-tight to every inch of flesh as his clothing usually did, save for the skirt which had always shown more that Albel could have possibly hidden.

One arm, his right one, rested uneasily on the doorframe, ample folds of fabric gathering at Albel's elbow. The other still remained hidden, stealing itself away inside the safety of the second sleeve.

_No claws means . . . no gauntlet? _

That's when Fayt finally understood. Albel was laying his character on the line, in the same way as he would by allowing Fayt to hold a sword to his throat. He was vulnerable, and he knew it, but still Albel came, showing no signs of retreat that Fayt could see. But to Fayt's knowing gaze, there was a slight hesitancy in the older man's manner. A noticeable insecurity, for lack of a better word, as if the fear of commitment, or possibly rejection still governed Albel's movements. A pessimistic attitude was advising him to stay back, and remain sheltered in the safety of isolation.

Albel was always strong; there was no question of that. He was obviously intelligent, and intuitive to an extent, but in affairs of the heart, Albel could only cringe at his inexperience. In this initial moment of their union, Albel was not the aggressor, the cunning seducer waiting patiently to pounce on his virgin victim. Nor was Fayt a simple conquest waiting to happen. The young man would not be a weak, pathetic child who would give in unquestioning to Albel's desires. If he wanted Fayt, he would have to work for it. The boy could not be fooled or tricked into anything, which had resulted in this tentative lovers' meeting.

Albel had come to offer himself to Fayt, as lover, as master, as owner, to dominate and subvert in a manner acceptable to both of them. It was up to Fayt to agree to the terms of their contract, and to add any amendments if he so desired it. It might have been his only chance to gain the Wicked One's services and love for the small price of his own. It was an equal trade if ever there was one, and a partnership that Fayt had no trouble accepting with all of his heart.

Fayt left the bed and approached Albel without making a sound, his manner calm and gentle. He acted as one does when drawing close to a wild animal, afraid to startle, but also wary of unprovoked attacks.

Albel watched him come with quiet anticipation, letting none of his overeager urges rule his behaviour. No matter how much he would have liked to grab the youth and fling him down on the bed, if only to satisfy his new found sexual appetite, Albel would wait until the boy offered himself. It would be pointless to take something without consent. That would be meaningless, although he couldn't help but scowl at how long everything was taking. Fayt was painfully slow in his task, and it was driving Albel mad with frustrated anxiety.

When Fayt was finally near enough, Albel caught him deftly and pulled him close, initiating an embrace which lasted longer than he had ever dreamed possible. Pleased with the sudden move, Fayt did nothing to stop it, and actually wriggled a little closer, twining one arm around Albel's torso possessively, while slipping a tentative hand under the neckline of the silken robe.

The boy's hands roamed freely, relishing the smooth cloth of Albel's garment as it brushed against his fingertips, inviting him to explore further. His fingers traced Albel's well-defined collarbones, and slid lower. The flat of his palm rested lightly on Albel's chest for a moment, surprised to find that the man's skin was almost as smooth as the robe he wore.

Leaning his head against Albel's shoulder, Fayt sighed and proceeded with his examination. Above him, Albel was resting his forehead against Fayt's, allowing unruly bangs to tickle the younger man's face.

In light of the boy's obvious attraction to him, Albel surrendered to this last temptation. Thoroughly. Fayt's kindness had defeated him at every turn, and in every possible way, yet the reward for losing was such that he really didn't mind in the slightest. Albel was finally willing to indulge in something everyone else took for granted. It was a new craving, and one he still hadn't become used to. That night he actually needed to feel the touch of another, and in doing so, experience the absence of his pain. For a moment, the dull ache of emotional torment had left him. He would take a chance, give in to love, and attempt the selection of a life partner who would remain by his side and face any and all challenges with him.

As for Fayt, his emotional victory had driven him into the Wicked One's waiting arms, happily too. Of course Albel still found it hard to believe that anyone could be drawn to him so strongly, and he still didn't know why, but it was becoming less and less important to know the reasons for Fayt's actions. It was clearly something which only Fayt would be able to understand, so Albel could only sit back and reap the benefits of his lover's desire, as well as his own.

Before long though, Fayt's diligent caresses faltered. He had yet to come to terms with his actions. "So, you want to be with me?" Fayt questioned finally, pulling himself away from Albel's tight, almost desperate embrace.

"I guess . . ."

Fayt shrugged. It wasn't much, but he'd take it. "Come on then. Is my bed okay? Or should we go to yours?" The questions were posed in such an innocent way, as if Fayt was discussing the latest weather. His nonchalance proved his comfort level and any doubts Albel may have been entertaining were swiftly dispersed and sent on their way, free to torment some other unlucky soul. Albel had had his fill of uncertainty.

"Here's fine," he offered as a reply. Simple, but to the point. Albel's curt answers were speaking volumes.

"Good." As Fayt broke their contact and began pacing toward the bed, his guest gained one more vital piece of knowledge about his potential lover. When he was alone, Fayt slept in loose fitting flannel pants. These same pants had the tendency to slip down a little as he walked, which treated Albel to more of Fayt's backside than the boy probably wanted him to see at the moment. As if their groping session hadn't done enough to rekindle his desire, the alluring curves of Fayt's slender hips which peeked above the waistband of his pants sealed Albel's fate.

Exerting every bit of willpower he possessed, Albel calmed himself. With great effort he fought against this sudden attraction. More than anything, he wanted to capture the boy, and rub every delicate part of Fayt's flesh against his body in order to appease the uncomfortable heat between his legs, but he couldn't. The worst part though, was seeing that Fayt had no concept of his own body. Oblivious and inconsiderate of his guest's suffering, Fayt sauntered to the side of his bed, absently tugging at his falling pants before pulling back the covers and crawling in. His back had been turned to Albel the entire time, and if it had been anyone else . . . Fayt's chastity wouldn't have stood a chance.

_Does he actually intend on sleeping? After doing _this_ to me? _Albel fumed, gritting his teeth against yet another throb of arousal. His entire body had been pulsating with excitement, knowing that the cause of it all was finally within reach. A wild gleam came into his eyes, and desire ruled his thoughts as Albel stormed toward the bed and its unsuspecting occupant.

With one arm, he yanked Fayt over so that the boy was flat on his back, ignoring the frightened gasp which followed the move. He straddled Fayt's hips, and the younger male glanced nervously at him. The look of surprise and uncertainty which Fayt wore only amplified his feelings.

"What do you think you're doing?" Albel demanded. His tone was low and dangerous, coming frighteningly close to snarling in his effort to sound both threatening and seductive. "If you didn't want to do anything, you shouldn't have invited me in, or to stay." Albel tilted his head to the side and narrowed his eyes in thoughtful distaste. "And you shouldn't have touched me like _that_."

Albel leaned down, lips meeting Fayt's who still couldn't resist him, feeding his untameable lust. Fayt kissed him back, trembling all the while. Part of him wanted this, and enjoyed what was happening, but something didn't feel right.

Albel eagerly began grinding his hips firmly against Fayt's body, only to feel nothing at all. Fayt wasn't reacting the way he had expected, and it troubled Albel more than he was willing to let on. The elder man parted from him, giving Fayt a moment to catch his breath before receiving another seductive taunt from the Wicked One.

"This is what you wanted, isn't it? What you _always_ wanted from me?" The words weren't spoken so much as breathed into him, with Albel's hot breath surging against his better judgement. Fayt's only answer was to flush crimson at the offer. Albel knew. How long had he known about those thoughts if he was willing to act on them so soon?

When Fayt refused to acknowledge his words, Albel nipped an earlobe, drawing a sharp cry from the younger man. The reactions the pain triggered within him were so completely wrong though. Fayt groaned, but it wasn't unpleasant.

A mischievous grin spread across Albel's face when he finally felt something stirring against his lower half. "So you like that, eh?" Albel purred, sitting up quickly, rubbing something warm and unfamiliar against Fayt's tense stomach.

Fayt paled as his body relayed the new information to his sex-fogged brain. _Under that robe . . . he's not . . !_

"Answer me, fool!" Albel craved dominance and control, but his partner was showing fewer and fewer signs of compliance, which forced the wicked man to act on his own.

While under siege from Albel's questions, Fayt remained stunned and silent as his mind processed the situation. All he could do was stare in mute shock at the older man who towered over his flattened form, noting the crazed desperation which flickered through crimson eyes as they silently begged him for confirmation.

Instinctively, Fayt nodded, still dazed by the intensity of Albel's desire for him. It was his penultimate victory. Fayt had Albel at his mercy once again, but he surrendered before anything could prolong their potentially painful battle. Albel needed to know that he was wanted, and Fayt was only too happy to oblige him. He had always had a soft spot for the Wicked One, after all. He couldn't bring any further pain to those expressive eyes, and he certainly never wanted to see them flicker and dull in defeat ever again.

Against his wishes, Fayt was being drawn into Albel's whirlwind of emotion, and the elder man's fierce need for reciprocation had weakened his will considerably. Sitting upright, Fayt met Albel's hungry eyes, noting with a sinking feeling the mad glint which hinted at the man's feverish state of arousal. It was lust, simple, but not necessarily pure, which made Albel's eyes sparkle in anticipation. In the wicked recesses of Albel's mind, rejection was no longer a possibility and he fully believed that Fayt would not stop him.

And truly, all things appeared to be going Albel's way. Fayt's arms were coiling around him, as he began exploring Albel's body with hands and lips, using all the attentive delicacy one would expect of their beloved. For Fayt, it was getting considerably harder to ignore his own needs, which only Albel could fulfill, and nearly impossible to justify _not_ giving the lascivious warrior what he wanted.

For the moment, Albel's movements remained forceful and precise as he scooped Fayt into his arms, running sensitive, scorched fingers through the boy's bright tresses, only to snarl at the expected flourish of pain the action caused him.

"Is this your answer? Your commitment, Albel? Or are you just using me?"

But Albel quickly shook his head. It was a very positive negative if ever there was one. "I want to be with you."

"For how long? Just for tonight?"

"Isn't that enough? Don't even _try_ to tell me that you're not tempted to take my offer. Consider this a hands-on appraisal of something I wish to make exclusively mine." There was something desperate about the way Albel touched him now. His caresses were firm, and surprisingly gentle, but also rushed as if he sensed the moment wouldn't last.

"Hmph, nothing but a test drive, eh?" Fayt muttered sullenly. There was a distinct bitter edge to his words, and Fayt frowned at his own conflicted feelings. His body stiffened defensively and recoiled as his wanton desire began to fade.

Albel looked at him, puzzled. The terminology had gone over his head. For the moment, lust had been cast aside for confusion and curiosity, which Fayt was much more comfortable with.

Fayt had always been careful of what he said, avoiding whenever possible the lengthy explanations for various terms and phrases which came natural to others like him, much like the things Albel said were sometimes beyond his reach. It would be impossible, and frankly pointless to initiate Albel into his own culture just so that the swordsman could understand a few specific innuendos and analogies. But now it appeared as though a lesson was in order.

Stroking Albel's head as if he was calming a disobedient child, Fayt tried to explain his dilemma. "On Earth, when someone wants to purchase any kind of vehicle or ship, you're allowed a test drive. If you like how everything works, you buy it. However, if something doesn't please you the first time around, then you're free to look elsewhere without making any commitments to anyone. If the product doesn't meet your standards, or fill your requirements, it's returned and left for someone else. How do I know you won't . . . decide that even I'm not good enough?"

"You should know me better than that, fool. I don't take anything lightly, not anymore. You wanted me, and I want you. Why wait?" Albel asked, breaking down their issues into the most basic components.

_Why, indeed. _"I already told you why," Fayt murmured, his arms once again coiling around Albel's shoulders, clutching at the body as if to feel out the truth of the older man's heart, but unable to concentrate on anything aside from feeling Albel's lips traveling across his skin as they explored him, marking his flesh with playful nips.

"But this feels good right now, doesn't it?" Albel replied, rocking his hips against Fayt's arousal hard enough to force a ragged gasp from the younger man. "Hmm, now tell me you don't want it."

Fayt bit his bottom lip and considered his situation, quite confident that his objectivity had vanished without a trace. If experience had taught him anything, it had showed him that one doesn't always have the leisure of waiting. Even if he was unsure, would giving in to the moment truly hurt him? Fayt sighed, clinging to Albel, but still mired in indecision. "Of course I want this, but . . ."

Sensing what was coming, Albel quickly wilted, and halted his attentions, falling into Fayt's embrace in defeat. It was that "but" which he dreaded. And the dread he felt was quickly made known to his partner.

"You're not ready. I see." Albel shook off the embrace, and would have retreated to his side of the bed, but Fayt grabbed him again and held him fast.

"I'm sorry . . ." Perhaps waiting would hurt them more than acting on what they felt ever would.

"Bah, forget it. I'll wait you out, fool. It's not as if I have anything better to do . . ." The flippant sarcasm was back with a vengeance.

"You mean that?"

"I've no reason to lie, and every reason to be honest." It had taken him long enough to come to terms with his feelings. A little more time spent in pursuit of Fayt wasn't a problem. Besides, things would be even more entertaining now, and Albel was looking forward to toying with the younger man now that everything between them had changed.

At that moment, Fayt finally realized what should have been obvious to him. Albel didn't act without good reason, after all. The offer of intimacy and the indulgent withdrawal were both signs of something greater. "You care that much about my feelings?" _About me?_

A half-hearted shrug was his only answer. Once backed into a corner, Albel had reverted to type.

Chuckling to himself, Fayt shook his head. Albel's reaction didn't surprise him so much as it amused him. Comforted him. Warmed his heart with its feel of familiarity. But the time for patterned interactions was over. Fayt would start by taking the lead, as was his duty, if not his desire.

Patience had never been Albel's strong suit. Even so, Fayt could never have imagined just how easily, and quietly things would progress. As Albel watched on in curiosity, Fayt ran his hands calmly over the other man's hunched shoulders and started removing the thin robe.

With little effort the garment loosened and slid down, revealing ghostly pale skin. Albel shivered quietly under his touch, and Fayt reasoned that the unnatural colour was only due to the chill of night, nothing more. The intense heat of his own body seemed to disagree though.

When Albel had undressed in the past, it had always been dark, too dark for Fayt to have seen anything beyond blurry outlines and misshapen shadows. Now though, he could see everything in the glowing moonlight which streamed through his uncovered window.

Alabaster skin marred by dull red scars stood out the most to him. They were, at best, proof of Albel's fortitude and persistence. Even as Fayt admired the strange beauty of what he saw, the story Albel's body told was not a happy one. Years of war and harsh training had left painful reminders of exactly how Albel had suffered. Serpentine streaks left by the claws of beasts, and swords of men alike, curved across the whole of his flesh like ties of bondage, both constricting and inescapable.

_He could have been so many different things. Infinite futures would have been made possible to him if he had been born on Earth, but to have lived only for the sake of greater strength . . . _

A small sigh slipped out as remorse got the better of him, leaving Fayt no choice but to cover up his thoughts with actions. He released his mind to the night, emptying his head of troublesome thoughts as his eyes passed up and down Albel's form yet again. Would he ever get tired of him? Would there ever come a day that looking upon this man would cease to excite him?

Albel's tongue slid gracefully along his partner's pursed lips, drawing him into a passionate kiss which wiped every single thought from Fayt's mind and left him quivering with desire. He would not be allowed to lose focus. After a few dazed and unintelligible mumbles of satisfaction, Fayt resumed his attentions.

While his mind refused to stay blank, and his thoughts still bothered his peaceful mental silence, Fayt remedied the situation as best as he could by massaging his concern away. With every stroke of fingers on flesh, Fayt eased the tension within them both. Albel would be bound to _him_ from now on, and his body would reflect that change.

Fayt nuzzled his companion's neck sympathetically, placing fervent kisses up the side until that, too, had reddened to a healthier shade. Silent, except for occasional sighs of pleasure, Albel still hadn't admitted anything. Words were nothing but an unwelcome addition. They would only disturb the joy of his silence.

Next, the boy slid his hands lower and reached between the swordsman's legs to stroke his arousal, wishing that the pleasure of the moment could vanquish the sins and pain of the man's past. The sounds Albel had been making intensified as Fayt touched him, but the boy insisted on making him work for his release.

"I want . . . I want you to show me how you feel." Fayt said suddenly as he withdrew. It was an open invitation, a challenge even, and one Albel couldn't ignore. Fayt had seen what he needed to see, and was now giving Albel permission to do as he pleased. Albel was _not_ going to let the opportunity slip by him.

_Consent? _Without wasting another moment on foreplay, he was well past that anyway, Albel took Fayt by the shoulders and forced him down on his back, only to descend upon the boy's quivering lips with his own. Fayt opened his mouth without a struggle and the Wicked One entered eagerly with an expert tongue.

But before too long it became painfully obvious that Fayt was unaccustomed to being kissed under such circumstances. His tongue merely floundered in meek surrender as Albel drove his own against it fiercely, attempting to elicit a response. _I bet, aside from me, he's only been kissed by his mother, and never like this. _Disappointed, Albel broke away and sighed deeply.

To his credit, Fayt looked up at him adoringly and implored for more but when he realized it was not forthcoming the boy shook violently with despair. _I'm not good enough. I can't satisfy him. Damn it! _"This was a mistake Albel. I'm sorry. We never should have bothered." Fayt made motions which resembled leaving and Albel quickly grabbed his wrists and held him down.

"I didn't give you permission to leave, worm," he drawled before leaning forward to whisper in Fayt's ear, tantalizing him with words of encouragement. "Don't be a fool. You are unsullied, Fayt. I can mould you into the perfect lover and then, you will please me like no one ever has." Albel's mouth watered at the thought. He was certain that the younger man would do anything for him, and do it with the kind of vigor that only comes from the belief that you are inadequate. That feeling was one which Albel knew all too well.

Albel gave him an apologetic smile and slid a hand along Fayt's stomach and over his chest. Well toned muscles tensed reflexively, and the smooth skin tightened in response to Albel's flowing caress. "Your body responds nicely to me, doesn't it, Fayt?" Albel's fixed smile grew smug then as inspiration struck.

A mouth that had only ever smirked and scowled at him, and a tongue that had always lashed out at him with insults and playful taunts, were now moving here and there, working steadily over every inch of his ever yielding body. Fayt never thought he'd experience their touch against his naked skin, or feel his heart hammering in his chest because of it.

In his efforts to please, Albel teased him in ways that bordered on cruelty. He never seemed to linger long enough in any one spot, and always moved on long before Fayt had been satisfied. Before long, Albel's determined teasing had left Fayt craving more, positively aching to be touched and tormented by him.

Albel pinched a hardened nipple for attention, and moved close once again, seeking yet another of Fayt's innocent kisses. It was beyond gratifying to play with Fayt in this manner and for the moment, Albel completely forgot that love had even entered the picture. His desire for Fayt was blinding him to everything else.

Frustration and impatience were taking their toll though. Fayt was wriggling just a little bit, which would have been more than welcome, if he hadn't been moving himself away from Albel in a vain attempt at retaliation.

He was, of course, easily caught and stopped by one very determined Albel Nox.

"What else were you expecting?" Albel asked, grinning with utter amusement at the sight of Fayt's antics. "I wouldn't do this if there was nothing in it for me, now would I? It's fun," Albel mused, "to watch you squirm."

"You sadistic bast - oh gods." Fayt couldn't help himself and he moaned his approval as Albel's wandering fingers shifted south and quickly made their way down the front of his pants. What had he gotten himself into?

Fayt opened his mouth to protest once again, but Albel silenced him with powerful and completely irresistible lips, devouring the half-muttered objections, and overruling them, moaning softly as their kiss deepened. Little did he know that the sounds he made had put Fayt fully at ease. This was not a time for thinking about actions and consequences. What mattered most of all to Fayt, were the hot lips pressed against his own in passionate persistence, begging him without a word to let himself go, and fall into the bliss Albel was offering him.

The final blow against common sense came when he felt slender fingers casually stroking him while steadily working away at the waistband of his pants. Fayt's entire body shook with fear and anticipation when he felt a rush of air brush against sensitive, tingling nerves as Albel pulled the protective trousers away and encircled Fayt's swelling erection with his fingers, drawing it out into the open.

Albel composed himself and parted from Fayt, tilting his head just enough to look his lover over from the waist down. His gaze shifted at will, taking in everything with greedy eyes.

Fayt looked deceptively delicate, proving that time spent in Albel's presence had indeed changed him. Frequent exercise had toned him better than any battle simulator ever could have. Matching exertion with a sparse diet had neatly ridded him of his weight advantage over Albel, and, in time, Fayt would likely become just as wiry as his partner.

Fayt, too, turned his head and smiled at the view. Flushed, yet feeling slightly numb to embarrassment after so much contact, Fayt was able to appreciate what Albel was doing to him. Was it pride he felt, seeing Albel's smug grin stretch from ear to ear just because of him?

"Eager, aren't you, Fayt?" Albel murmured softly. There was no answer necessary, but Fayt gave one anyway, nodding weakly as he pushed himself wantonly into Albel's hand until the other man tightened his grip. Albel continued to smile absently while watching Fayt's glorious reactions to his touch. It would be easy to please the boy. Hell, if he allowed it, Fayt was obviously more than willing to please himself.

But as Albel casually traced his finger in intricate motions between the youth's legs, easing them gently apart, it became clear that Fayt was still uncertain about what was expected of him.

Fayt placed the palms of his hands on Albel's chest and calmly pushed the other man away from him. "Albel, what are you-"

A brief flash of anger crossed glowing red eyes at the denial, but when Albel saw the look of self-conscious confusion on Fayt's face, his own features softened with understanding and he shook his head at his own stupidity. _I should have known it would be like this. I would have to fall for an amateur, but to be honest, it's better this way. He can't control me. I have power over him at last._

"Don't tell me. Let me guess. This has never happened to you before, correct?" Albel ceased his actions and pried for information. "You're completely inexperienced?" Fayt nodded hesitantly and Albel sighed. Taking hold of the younger man's trembling hands which were beginning to dig into his chest, Albel gently brushed them away.

"And I'm not just talking about the fact that I'm a _man_. You've never been with a woman either, have you Fayt?" _It's pretty damned obvious he doesn't have a clue. I'll make his first time memorable, at least. He'll never want anyone else to touch him after this. Only me. Gods, what have I done to deserve this gift?_

"Do you want me to stop? I won't force you if you're unwilling."

"N-no, it's just that . . ." Fayt flattened his body against the bed a little more and avoided Albel's questioning eyes. Being the center of attention was starting to bother him.

"Are you afraid? You know I won't hurt you." The words he spoke were foreign to him. Fayt might not doubt him, but Albel certainly doubted himself. Would he be able to keep that promise?

"What if I want you to?" Fayt smirked, looking positively daring as he spoke. He would do anything, say anything, if he knew it would counter Albel's unspoken doubts. A little pain would be a small price for their happiness.

"You've become fond of pain, Fayt? I suppose that's my influence, hmm? Well then, if that's the case . . ." Albel grinned and bowed his head, acting perfectly accommodating. "I'll do anything you ask, just say what you want from me."

"What is it that you want, Albel?" Fayt said as he reached up with both arms and pulled Albel into a tender kiss. Fayt was infinitely gentle, and Albel's lips parted for him with little coaxing, allowing the younger man's tongue to slide inside his mouth. Accepting the Fayt's advances was proving to be quite satisfying. Fayt shifted his focus and gave Albel a teasing peck on the cheek. "Mmn, well?" he mumbled.

Albel nestled into Fayt's neck and spoke, his voice hovering somewhere between a whisper and a growl. "I want to make you come, and have your taste linger on my lips. Is that too much to ask?"

Albel flushed when Fayt's arms tightened around him. It was unexpected, and Fayt's reaction sent a shiver of pure relief through his partner as the boy silently shook his head, burying his face deeper into the crook of Albel's neck.

Flustered and confused by Fayt's reaction, Albel's confidence wavered. "I don't understand."

Fayt sighed and released Albel, then leaned against the headboard of the bed so that they were face to face. Fayt's expression, a mix of sadness and gratitude, allowed Albel yet another glimpse into the heart of Fayt Leingod. "You're probably the only one, who wants something so simple from me. I'm glad."

Unexpected praise, Albel learned, was the best he would ever receive. Lost for words himself, Albel rested his forehead against Fayt's and closed his eyes. He needed to think.

Long ago he had learned how to take what he needed from his partner in order to fulfill his urges while leaving the other wanting. But being with Fayt was different. To consider someone else's needs along with his own was a frightening prospect and, to be honest, Albel didn't know if he was up to the challenge.

"Fayt?" Still looking thoughtful, Albel opened his eyes.

"Yeah?"

"Sit up," Albel ordered. It wasn't a harsh command, but neither was it a simple request. "And don't bother asking why. You'll see." Albel grinned and rose to a sitting position, delighted when he saw Fayt do the same.

The young man was willing to give him everything, and, for once in his life, he wanted it all. To feel another react with joy under his experienced hands. To hear sounds of happiness come from his lover. To _have_ a lover in every sense of the word and not just a casual bedmate taken out of pure physical need. Albel closed his eyes for a moment and just enjoyed the expectancy. Love, and the desire to please, was making this better than he ever could have imagined possible.

After all, Fayt should have been beyond him. What the fool saw in him, he never could figure out. But whether Fayt's intentions were driven by pity, love or something else entirely, no longer mattered. To preserve his flimsy grasp on sanity, Albel couldn't ask _why_ any of this was happening. All that was needed was his acceptance.

ooooo

**A/N:** Hehe, I'm stopping it there because I'm a tease ;) Besides, if I continued on from here this chapter would be too damned big for me to handle so…a little split was in order. Oh, and you guys can go ahead and review if you want. I won't stop you, I promise!


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